Birthplan omissions

[jaabaar]

Hi!

What did not include in your birthplan and subsequenly wished you had?

I am 38+4 and have meeting with midwife discussing birthplan.

Thanks

G x

Hmmm... I had no regrets as the plan was never needed/used. I honestly think they are a bit of waste of time.

I found I just had to go with the flow; my birth wasn't what I expected so I just made the decisions as I went along... And if the decisions need to be made fast I doubt mw or doctors will waste time going through your notes looking for the plan- they will just come and ask questions directly.

That said, I think it's good to make sure your birthing partner knows the most important things you wish for your birth so they can answer doc's questions re how to proceed in case you wouldn't be able to do so.

All the best, hope it all goes well for you

I think lots of people misunderstand what a birthplan is meant to achieve. Writing "I'd like a drug-free natural birth with only water and whale music for pain relief" it has minimal bearing on what will actually happen once labour gets going.

What I found invaluable was using it as a statement of wishes/preferences so I didn't have to be asked/think about them when I was "preoccupied" and nothing was assumed that I didn't want to be. So, I'm glad I stated:

1. No-one is to touch/examine me without asking permission and explaining what they would like to do.

1. I'd like the likelihood of success of an instrumental delivery explained with the option of going straight to c-section if intervention is required.

1. I'd like my husband to tell me whether the baby is a boy or a girl.

1. I'd like the midwife to help suggest optimum positions for the pushing stage.

It was clear my birthplan had been read/explained to everyone who dealt with me which gave me a sense of control and confidence in the process despite a highly medicalised labour and birth. Point 1 in particular was really comforting. I have several friends who have said that the most distressing part of their births was feeling like a piece of meat with numbers of people doing unknown stuff to them, esp. as things started to complicate and increased interventions were required.

HTH

birthplan schmirthplan. At 1pm we were getting shown round the DMU - had a lovely waterbirth planned, had the perfeAtly packed bags. For the second time (!) didn't get bag unpacked (didn't even get it out from car..), we'd gone back to the unit at 7.30 or so - had DD2 at 9.45, was only in delivery room for 10mins. About 5 mins before she was born I said to midwife "I should be having a waterbirth", to which she replied "well, you should have come in earlier then".

To be honest I don't think birthplans are worth the paper they are written on

sorry, just read that back. Didn't mean to imply jaabaar or mozarela didn't know what a birthplan was to achieve!

Was just meant to refer generally to people who say "the plan went out of the window" or similar.

I think lal123 makes my point quite nicely. 3 of 4 of my "preferences" would still have been perfectly valid.

Put in whether you are happy with a medical student/midwifery student being there. I always write that I'm happy as long as one is there for the whole thing, but not with a student just popping in for half an hour at the end, for the exciting bit. A student tried to do that with my recent birth, and the midwife told her to go away in no uncertain terms, and said to me "I don't think its fair to the mum when they do that so I'm always glad when birthplans mean I can tell them to stay out!"

Thinking about things that changed between my birthplan with DC1, and DC4 who I had recently... hmm....

added;
-Natural 3rd stage
-Wanting to pay for a private room in hospital (so it could be booked early in the day)
-Not wanting examinations to check how far dilated I am... I find it depressing as I go from 1-4 cm reeeaaallly slowly, and then from 4-transition in a very painful half an hour. Prefer going by how much pain I'm feeling, how much gas and air I need. Just have midwife check when I feel like pushing, that I'm fully dilated.

Having had 4 children, I've found a comprehensive birth plan (Please don't offer me epidurals, just gas & air etc..) helpful. Midwives have always read them.

I found my birthplan (for #2) invaluable - all the people who dealt with me read it, and it actually changed the course of events, as I was in the consultant unit where people seemed fairly keen to intervene to 'speed things up' but my birthplan was really clear, so once people had taken the time to read it they encouraged me off the bed, and I gave birth with gas and air only. Be really clear about your preferences and if there are things you think would help ask to be reminded/encouraged etc to try (e.g. different positions, water etc). I totally understand why people say birthplans can be a waste of time, as my first birth certainly didn't go to plan, but being more prepared second time around, and having a comprehensive plan was invaluable. My community midwife helped me to phrase it so I didn't annoy everyone, and she suggested that as I was so against having syntocinon, I could refuse it, and go straight to CS if things had to 'sped up' that much.

TBH ive found them a waste of time.
Ive done 2 and neither made it out the bag.

At no point was I unable to make my wishes known (even when i had an EMCS). I never followed either of them, because other things happened and changed my mind.

Just know what you want and make sure your birth partner knows as well.

Thanks very much, some comments made me smile too!

g

For my second, DH had written in large letters

THIS WOMAN IS HOSPITAL PHOBIC

They treated me with kid gloves and I got the very low intervention VBAC I so desperately wanted.

Just wish he'd added: SHE MUST NOT SEE ANY NEEDLES as I nearly leapt off the bed and ran into Headington when they came to stitch me up.

Having DC3 at home (God willing) any day now.

I also think it's important to put what you want immediately after the birth. If you want the baby passed straight to you for skin to skin, who you want to cut the cord, who you want to tell you boy/girl if you don't already know and whether you want to bf or ff etc.

My birth plan covered things i'd like if my labour didn't go to plan (eg emcs, instrumental etc etc). My DH and independent midwife knew what labour I wanted so no need to write it down. My IM was great, helping me write mine. She made some good suggestions about handling the baby (eg hand to mum first, examine baby on mum unless emergency etc etc), induction, third stage etc.

I didn't need it in the end though but I found the process useful as it helped my DH be clear as to what I wanted!

As long as your DH or birth partner is fully briefed and prepared to defend you, you shouldn't worry about one too much. (I say defend because I think hospital births are at such risk of intervention. I suggest any mum to be reads the NICE guidelines as it's amazing how many health professionals "forget" recommended practice and just do what's always been done!)

nice one, MrSnortpigs

my 'big letter' points this time are SEND OFF MY CLEXANE PRESCRIPTION NOW and GET ME IN THE POOL

(last time I had to stay an extra 24h while they fannied about getting my anticoagulant scrip sorted - not planning on hanging about that long this time!)

NB are you still on Oxon?

aah bless mr snortpigs

I didn't have a birth plan either time.

However this time (only 11 wks now so ages) I want a natural 3rd stage cos of retained placenta the 2nd time and perhaps a water birth. Do those requests mean you have to write a plan??

girls I'd write one to cover your bases in case you don't get a waterbirth or you need a managed third stage (eg haemorrhage).
I wanted a natural third stage but was losing blood so midwife decided to give me the injection. In my plan I said I wanted the cord cut after it had stopped pulsating (so DS got all of the blood.) If I'd not requested it, the cord would have been cut straight away.

have my booking apt on monday so will discuss with mw then.

yes MrsB I am still in Oxon - still phobic of hospitals and slightly freaked out that there are drugs in my fridge should they be required at the birth.

Girlsyearapart - I'm 38+4 and still haven't discussed birth plans with my community midwife !
If you're booking in at around 10 weeks (standard) they really will not be talking to you about birth plans at that early stage.

I didnt have one last time but then I hadnt found MN then.

This time I am a lot more clued up on things so mine is -

No forceps - Ventouse or c section.
No examinations until I feel ready to push.
The baby is not to be moved from mine or dp's view at anytime.
I want a natural 3rd stage and will ask for the injection if I want it - Gentle cord pulling only please.
I want to be discharged as soon as possible.

Thats about it. I didnt any of that last time as I just went with the flow.

TBH I doubt I will even get it out of my bag but its nice to have it written down

Oh Fibilou thanks.
I am clueless as to birth plans as didn't have them either time before.