My answers:-
Big knickers are great as the waistbands of them sit well above your scarline. Anything that is vaguely close to the area of your scar can feel really, really uncomfortable. I was very tender around my scar and couldn't bear anything near it. Big knickers were great and the bonus of a giant pack of cheap ones was that if they got disastrously messy from the lochia or a leaking pad you could just chuck them in the bin. I also used disposable knickers for the first couple of days. They're paper and you chuck them out after use and they're also good for circulating air around your scar, which helps with healing. I bought cheapy packs from M&S. I think I bought twenty or so pairs in the end.
I took nightdresses as I don't like pyjamas (I never normally wear anthing in bed) and also the thought of faffing with waistbands post-op was too much. I changed my nightdress every day and had a spare for any leaking episodes, which I didn't actually have.
You can take paracetamol on top of the pain med. My TOP TIP is to be on top of your pain relief. Get it before the previous medication wears off rather than having to chase it as it's much harder to kill pain this way. I had drugs every four hours and three and a half hours before I would ring my buzzer and ask for my medication. I had a grim caesarean and GA so I needed extra pain medication so I'd also say that if you're in pain and the current meds aren't really touching the sides then ask for extra. They have lots of different sorts that they can offer you and some people need stronger painkillers. Some caesareans are harder than others and some people react to the surgery and healing in different ways. If it hurts, don't be "brave" and struggle on. Far better to get some extra painkillers and enjoy your time with your baby.
My midwife made me remove the dressing the day after. I think as a psychological trick really as she wouldn't do it for me (although I begged her as I was terrified of ripping open). I think she wanted to show me that my scar wasn't something to be scared off and wouldn't burst open like a horror film. In the end I took it off after my shower - soaked the sticky bandage with soapy water and inched it off when it was damp. It didn't hurt, but because it was an adhesive bandage and stuck to the skin I went slowly. My husband helped.
I had a threaded stitch which I'm really pleased with as I've a very tidy, neat scar. They pulled it out on day 4 or 5 (can't remember) and it didn't hurt, although again I was in a complete panic about it.
Baths are fine and can be quite nice when you're tired and a bit strung out post-birth. Put some tea tree oil or lavender oil in the bath as these are antiseptic and antifungal (tea tree oil is better but you can mix both - say six or seven drops of tea tree and two or three of lavender). Avoid harshly scented soaps or bubble baths, etc. Dry your wound really carefully as damp conditions can encourage infection. My midwife encouraged me to use a hairdryer on a cold setting to dry it but my consultant went berserk when I told him as he basically said that I'd be blasting the gunk and fluff from the hairdryer filter into my scar and it was much better to use a clean flannel or towel to dry it and give it some 'air time' as often as I could. I did this - avoided the hairdryer and lay with my tummy exposed for half an hour here and there - and never got an infection in spite of having a haematoma behind my scar (blood clot - great breeding ground for infection apparently!).
I wouldn't lift anything for a good few weeks. You'll know when it feels right but I'd be surprised if you could do much before four weeks. Although the scar and underlying muscles/uterus are superficially healed after three weeks it's only surface healing and the area is still very tender and weak and so straining the area should be avoided.
I had a rubbish, complicated caesarean (quite a rare combination of events so don't worry) and still felt absolutely crap and poleaxed at 3 weeks post-op. I literally struggled to get to the end of my road. However, literally one morning I woke up at 3 1/2 weeks and felt like a different person. Presumably everything had just finally knitted together. I do remember it being literally overnight though and quite odd. I'd been an old lady the night before and then the next day I was around 80% my old self. Continuing with the percentages, I felt 90% at 4 weeks post op and then 100% 6 weeks post op. By 12 weeks post op I started running again and things felt absolutely fine.
Good luck. My two top tips are to take all the pain meds you need and also to take some Andrex moist loo roll (the loo wipes you can get in the supermarket). They're an absolute godsend for post birth loo trips when you haven't got the energy or stomach muscles for complicated clear-up jobs. There's a lot of lochia and gunk post birth and these things really helped clean me up with minimal effort.
HOpe this all helps.
K