So - come tell me what you did with your DC1 whilst home birthing your DC2 ?

[puffylovett]

I sort of thought that DS1 (2.6) might be around and about, not entirely sure how it's going to pan out. I'm 29 weeks btw. I have this vision in my head of my homebirth being like that lovely spanish mattress add that's been posted on here a few times ! Except maybe in water..

However practically my whole family disagree and think he should be removed from the scene of the crime as it may be too traumatic for him.

What do you think ?

I had a homebirth with DD2 who will be 2 on tuesday, DD1 was 14months when DD2 was born and was at the birth in daddies arms having a good look, she wasn't fazed by it at all, but to be honest i think she was too young to understand that blood meant pain etc,

Not sure what we will be doing this time DD3 due in sept, i think i will plan to have them around but not there as i think it would upset them, especially DD2 who is very much a mummies girl.

Oh and i was supprised when my DD1 was in the shower with me and said 'the baby will come out of your ninny like hattie did won't she?'....she has recently turned 3 and i have not said more than the baby is in mummys tummy..so she clearly remembers how she got out and seems quite excited about it. x

good luck

DD1 was 2.3 and I had really hoped that she would sleep through and wake to find her new baby sister/brother had arrived.

All was going to plan when my waters went at 3am (first labour was only 6 hrs, so thought this one could be very quick). Unfortunately DD2 got a bit stuck and things didn't progress for a while. So (reluctantly) we called my mum at 6am as DD1 stirred and she kept her in the lounge with Rice Crispies and funnily enough -The Jungle Book.

It was really lovely and we had chance to get everything sorted (cleaned up) before our girls met.

I look at her now (3.5) and think she would be fine to have been around as it was happening. But then I look at pictures of her on the day and realise how much more immature she was. I think she would have possibly been upset by it all.

Also you don't know how much pain you are going to be in or how you will behave. So I think it's wise to have a back-up plan and then just see how it goes.

Good luck with it all and hope you have a great Homebirth whatever you decide to do.

My sister went into labour at home. It turned out to be a very short painful labour, and her DH had to deliver the baby. My poor little 18month oldniece was found in the corner of the next room by the ambulance driver . She was traumatized and was just saying over and over again "mummy crying"

8.30 a.m. ds1 off to school
9.30 a.m. me off to maternity ward (just old fashioned, I guess, I like LOTS of doctors, medical equipment and the machine that goes "ping")
10 a.m. induced at full term because dh is going away in a few days time
11 a.m. up the dose of hormone thingy because nothing is happening
1 p.m. ds2 is firmly attached to boob
3 p.m. transferred from birthing room to bedroom
5 p.m. dh picks ds1 up from school, brings him to clinic to meet ds2.ds1 more interested in the tv channels available and the buttons to make the bed go up and down.

The worst thing was that I missed lunch.

Easy!

DS1 spent the night at his my wonderful childminders as we have no family nearby and they werent supportive of me having a hb anyway.

He was 19 months, it was great as my cm brought him round at about 12pm the next day so we all had a sleep. He then met his new brother when it was calm (if you can video it, it makes me cry everytime)

Dh went to bed during the labour and he and mw only just made it down in time for the birth.

I loved my hb. good luck

DD1 was at nursery.
MW: "what time does she finish"
me: (between contractions, wondering absently why they didn't ask DH) "1 o'clock"
MW: "oh we'll have this baby out by then.
12.55, DD2 arrived!
(No I didn't do the nursery run to pick DD1 up.)
I had lots of alternative arrangements - in principle I was happy for her to be there if she wanted to, but I also prepared a list of 7 people who had offered to come and get her if necessary.

DD (2.8) went to my Mum's ten mins away, had a 2.5hr labour with DS and my Mum bought DD back 1.5hrs after he was born. She then stayed with me til about 8 (DS born at 3pm) so that she could help feed DD and get her to bed for us.

Was all very relaxed and lovely Hope you have a lovely HB - I've had two and they are wonderful.

With my DD I went into labour in the early hours and I called my friend at 7am who came straight away and watched Thomas videos with DS downstairs.

With DS2, DS1 was a very reliable 5.5 year old so I knew he would be OK and indeed he slept through the whole thing as I went into labour late at night. DD however woke up and so friend was called again and she had the joy of watching Tweenies videos.

Because I have no family to call on I had already planned if there was a problem I would transfer to hospital on my own and DH would stay with the kids.

If I ever have a DC4, I will go to hospital on my own and have a mini-break away, LOL!

I had an unplanned (very fast) homebirth with DD. DS slept through the whole thing and we have a very small house! I kept asking between screams if I'd woken DS.

When I'd had practice contrations DS had helped DP rub my back. I liked him being there for the early stages but don't think I'd like him there for delivery. DP was in shock after DD's birth and he'd seen it all before so I think a toddler would have been overwhelmed.

If we have #3 I'd ask for a homebirth but have someone on call who could take DS out or sit with him if it was night time. Personally I would be distracted with him in the room.

I loved my homebirth even if it was unplanned. The best bit was spending DD's first night in my own bed with DP and having DS snuggle up with us in the morning.

Forgot to add that I did have my parents present just in case the dcs were upset or things went wrong and I had to go into hospital.

foxytocin has a great story. Can't remember the detail but the friends who were going to look after her dd had been drinking so couldn't come to get her, she (dd) then slipped on water on the kitchen floor (from the birthing pool) and broke her leg iirc. To top it all, the midwife got lost. Epic story.

I was planning on SIL being here for DS (then 3.3). I thought she could take him to the park, to a friend's house, to a different room - whatever seemed right.
In the end things happened MUCH faster than anticipated. DS was in the room and was completely fine. I had made him a treasure chest of 'big brother' pressies and he was busy opening those and glanced over occasionally. At one point he sauntered over while eating an ice lolly and whispered in my ear - "Come on Mummy. You can do it". He said it unprovoked and with such sweetness. Definitely my favourite memory of the whole experience
He also popped over to watch the placenta being delivered and did flinch a bit but we talked about what it was and what we had read about it in various books and he calmed immediately. In our situation DS was very verbal and able to talk about his feelings and understand explanations. I think that really made all the difference. If he had been much younger I'm not sure I would have been as happy with how things had turned out.

I would just try to give yourself options. I think it's sensible to have another adult around and follow your instincts nearer the time.

yet more lovely stories and great advice !

Planning on having my mum come over, all being well. Apparently we have to have a 3rd adult around for a water birth, so actually she's probably going to have to stick around unless we can call on others, but our house isn't big enough for 4 adults, a toddler, 2 midwives and a birthing pool ! Lol.

Looks like I'd better stock up on some DVDs then

I went into labour around 7am. Ds1 (then 2.7) was around, having breakfast & watching CBeebies, so it all felt quite nice and normal. When things started hotting up my parents came round & my poor old dad took him off to the park for a couple of hours in the freezing cold till after ds2 was born. When they wandered back in, ds1 was askedif he wanted to see mummy and his new baby brother, and he said 'Yes, after lunch'.

I thought I'd want him to be there but actually it worked out well - the second stage seemed to go on for ever and I was screaming the house down, I'm sure he would have been upset if he'd been around, instead he had a fairly normal day.

Good luck for your hb, they're great.

DD2 - DD1 was 18month slept through whole thing, DD2 born at 4am after 2 1/2 hour labour

DD3 - DD1 4yo, DD2 2 1/2yo, both slept through although DD1 woke just after DD3 was born and came into bed for a cuddle, SIL nad a friend were here in case they woke

Not much to offer from me but wanted to say this is a really helpful thread as I'm wanting a homebirth but will have a 4 year old and 18 month old in the house. Was wondering how I'd do it, this has given me some ideas.

It's sounding like Jungle Book is the way forward, isn't it whistlejacket

I'd say that the key is to be flexible. I had a fab HB where for the start of labour (in the afternoon) a friend took DD1&2 out for a walk / to the park. They then came back, kissed me night night and went to sleep upstairs (my parents put them to bed) whilst I had DS1 downstairs. They slept through it all and woke up in the morning to meet their new baby brother.

I wish I had prepared DD1 a bit more because she was quite worried to see me in pain but other than that it worked out really well.

Good luck... I am feeling quite jealous that you have a home birth ahead of you !

well, fingers crossed !! I went 18 days over with DS and they wouldn't 'let' me have one (I didn't have the strnegth or guts to put my foot down) and I'm pretty sure they've got my dates wrong this time too, so we will have to see.

But I'm loving all these stories, it's making me even more positive about having DC2 at home

My contratctions started at 2:30pm. I called the MW and DH called FIL. FIL came and waited to see what the MW said. She arrived and called for the second MW. FIL took DD to the park and his house. My best friend showed up at 5pm and FIL brought DD back at 6pm. He gave her a bath and put her to bed. I was able to hold it together enough to help put her to bed like normal. She slept through everything and I had DD2 in the living room at 9:45.

The reason we had another person there was because the MW's said if there was an emergency they would need DH and he also wanted to focus on the birth. Everything turned out great and as a result of my best friend being there we were able to webcam the birth to my family in the states as she also kept them updated!

It is such a great experience and I am sure everything will work out great. I was sooo worried too in the weeks before but it all worked out in the end.

I'm afraid I don't have time to read the rest of the thread but we arranged for DS1 to go to MIL's. DH wanted to be able to look after me and not worry about DS1 and I didn't want him to see me either in pain, or getting into difficulties if things went wrong. People would have been rushing around and I think he would have got upset.

DS1 left at 16.30, DS2 born at 23.47, MIL brought DS1 back the next morning and then she insisted on taking him back with her to give us another night with DS2. It was a very good idea as DS1 had a lovely hols with Grandma and Grandad and we had time to clear up the 'mess' from the birth and spend afew precious moments just baby gazing!

BR

There's also the issue that you might have to transfer to hospital so if there's only your OH present he'd have to stay with DC and you'd go to hosp on your own.

The ideal is prob if you have a friend or family member who can come to look after DC while you labour, esp if they're not school age .

I gave birth on Monday morning - first contraction 4am, sent DC (11 and 6) off to friend's house for breakfast and taking to school around 6am while I could still kiss them goodbye and reassure them, gave birth 8.29. I made a lot of noise they may have found a bit disturbing! DH phoned the school and they got the kids to come to the phone to be told the news, then he fetched them early. Worked out perfectly.

My MIL was coming to stay with us for 10 days from 3 days before the due date. She arrived at 5.30 and we were just sitting down with a cup of tea at about 6 when my waters broke (first sign of anything happening). DS1 (then 2.3) thought I had wet myself, all very comical. DS1 was very excited about having granny to stay and was quite happy for her to put him to bed (glad I didn't have to sit on a plastic bag to read him stories in bed). DP had just got on the train 2.5 hours away and arrived home 1/2 hr before DS2 got here, just as my contractions really started. It was all very relaxed, we had 2 midwives, a student midwife, MIL and DP in the kitchen, but all of them bar DP were hanging out at the other end of the room drinking tea while I was in the pool and were a bit suprised when I announced that I was holding the baby's head.

I'll never forget the look of wonder and confusion on DS1's face when he came in to our room the following morning and met his little brother.

It was great, I'd do it again tomorrow if I didn't have to be pregnant or deal with another year of no sleep!

Ment to say, of my 6 friends who have had 2nd/3rd babies at home, all of us have delivered at night with older DCs asleep.

DD1 slept through it. Most home births seem to happen at night since that's when you relax after the day's activities.

I kinda wanted DD1 to see DD2's birth, but DH didn't so we had a friend on standby to take her.

But like I said, she was asleep upstairs, didn't even stir with all my noise and woke up to a new baby sister!