Would you have a homebirth if you were me?

[fairywing]

It's very very early days for us yet but i'm the sort of person who likes to research things incessantly!! I had my booking in appointment yesterday with the midwife and had said before hand that i woud discuss homebirth with them but i was worried about the distance from the hospital so would need some reassurance about that before i would seriously consider it. When it got to talking about where i wanted to give birth the midwife suggested homebirth straight away. I raised my concern but she didn't seem to think it would be a problem. She has said to raise it with the midwife after my scan who will be my allocated midwife throughout the pregnancy and she will talk me through things. I want to be well informed before then.

I have scoured the net, this site and the homebirth website but stil feel undecided. My reasons for wanting a homebirth is that i would really like to attempt to give birth with g&a only although i am totally open minded about that, i have read so many horror stories about hospitals, i like the idea of being in my own home and think i would manage the pain and stay in control better at home as hospitals make me feel tense as soon as i get to the carpark! The things worrying me is the potential risk to baby and me.

From what i have read midwives along with emergency services support if necessary can deal with most things that may arise including PPH or baby not breathing etc and i am very open minded about having to go into hospital if needed or if i can't cope. There also seems to be statistically no more risk at home thn hospital i think the risks are just weighted differently.

The hospital is 30 mins away by car, i know an ambulance will go faster but they need to get to me first. I also realise that there is a delay in getting emergency treatment even if you are already in hospital so perhaps the gap isn't so big between the two scenarios.

This will be my first baby. So i'm just wondering what others think they would do in my situation to see if it stimulates any mor thoughts for me. Either way i will not attempt a homebirth unless i am feeling 100% confident about it by the time it comes round.

Thanks in advance!

Yes I would.

There is research that shows that homebirth for a low risk woman is the safest option. The midwives will transfer you in during labour at the first sign of something not quite right if necessary.

I would too.

If your pregnancy low risk and you don't have any problems then I would recommend it.

I had my daughter at home (first baby too) and I'm really glad I did. Me, DP and 2 lovely midwives.....and the 3 of us went to bed together that night in our own house (me DP and bubs that is not the midwives!)

It was tough, lasted 20 hours and I only had gas and air but it was the single most exhilarating experience of my life!

The advantages are many and if it's what feels right to you then do it.

Oh and if you want to ask any questions about being a first timer and a home birther then just shout!

yes

To be honest, no I would not have a homebirth if I were you.

My first baby was hospital born; my second two at home.

I would not have my first baby at home. It's too scary, you just don't know what will happen. There are too many unknowns. Because my first birth was straightforward, I knew that the chances were high that my second and third births would also be straightforward, and I felt that having a home birth second and third time round was not such a risk.

Also I live just five minutes from the hospital - thirty minutes is a long way to go if there are problems.

Would you think about hiring a doula? Or do you have a midsife led unit close by?

Yes, I would.

I had a homebirth for my second baby and it was absolutely lovely. I am almost tempted to get pregnant again to repeat the experience. I only had TENS for pain relief. I didn't need gas and air and my daughter was born after 3 hours and 18 minutes of labour. I also used the natal hypnotheraphy CDs

The advantages of a homebirth.

• You have a midwife all to yourself.
• There is no stress trying to find a parking space in a hospital car park. You are in far more control of your enviroment. The midwives are guests in your* home and that really changes the dynamic. No one will bully you into continous monitoring. There is nothing silly like "nil by mouth" or having lots of strange people popping in and out of the delivery room.
• You can do whatever you like, ie. have candles, hire/ buy a birthing pool, use TENS, surf the web.

Prehaps the biggest disadvantage to a first time mother is that you will have very little help with establishing breastfeeding. To get round this problem I suggest that you attend a couple of La Leche League meetings when pregnant and read up on breastfeeding. If possible make sure that your partner at least knows in theory how to get a baby to latch on. Maybe he will be able to spot your mistakes at 3 am.

If I was you I would book your homebirth. If you don't want a homebirth its quite easy to change your mind later on, but it is difficult to get a hospital booking changed to a homebirth.

Yes, I would, in fact I did!

I had DD (my first and only) at home at 21. At the time we lived 7 miles from the hospital.

My midwife told me that in a first labour the most common reasons for transfer are that things are going 'too slowly' or that stronger pain relief was required - so, genuine emergencies where speed is of the essence are very rare. Also the fact that at home you have the undivided attention of at least one midwife means that any emergency situations may to be picked up on far sooner. All the equipment in the world is no good without constant care and someone to notice warning signs, and IMO I had a better chance of that at home.

I'd do it again if I ever have another.

The decision is down to you. I would say that you need to be 99% wanting it and feel that it is right for you.

I had my Dd at home. It was my first child, she was born in a pool. I had no pain relief at all and it was amazing.

Peoples responses to my choice varied from 'you are so brave' to 'that is so risky'. However, I was clear that that is what I wanted to do.Like you I live 30 mins from the nearest hospital.

My second child was going to be a home birth but when my waters broke DC was breech and I transferred to hospital (in 20 mins). Hospital birth (which happened in this case) was fine too. But I came out unscathed (no stitches or meds etc) and I am sure the first birth being so 'natural' assisted with the delivery second time around!

I would suggest do your research, listen to the professionals and decide what is best for you, you partner and the baby! there is no reason why, if the conditions are right, you cannot have your first child at home.

I agree with belgo.

I've just had my second baby at home - the first was a hospital birth.

I am 100% glad I had my second as a homebirth and, for me, there was a lot wrong with the hospital set up (including anxiety just from being in the place).

BUT... I wouldn't have had the same good hb experience even if I'd had my first at home. I didn't know what to expect, didn't have the inner confidence that my body could do it, was unprepared for the pain.

FOr a first baby, I'd try for a MLU.

Yes, If I'd known then what I know now I'd have had a homebirth for my first.

I also agree with what AnarchyAunt says about potential problems being picked up earlier at a homebirth where you have a midwife with you constantly.

I would yes, and I did.

You never know how labour will progress, so I don't really understand the argument about doing it in hospital first time round. Even if it's your 4th there will be unknowns.

Then there is the point of view given to me by my midwife that if something is going to go wrong to require transfer, it may be better in a first timer for who the labour is usually slower, so any problems will take longer to develop.

Then finally, I thought that the first time can set the blueprint for my future labours so I didn't want to be getting over a birth trauma or doing a vbac second time round because I had had such a bad time with my first birth at hospital.

Yes I would. My first baby was born at home, it was a wonderful experience.

Agree with rubles - each labour is individual, and having a straightforward 1st baby is no guarantee of subsequent labours being the same, so I don't follow the hospital first time round argument.

I didn't know what to expect and was unprepared for the pain but dealt with it better for being at home. Looking back, I think it may have been very different in hospital as I may not have conformed to their time frames and needed 'help'.

Not sure about 100% confident though. I would have anxieties about giving birth no matter where I was planning to be.

Should have clarified: yes IF my baby arrived after 37 weeks and I had a low risk pregnancy.

yes, I would. but that's me and not you.
in our area the midwives have to alert ambulance control when they attend a homebirth, and they keep an ambulance in the area.

you will have TWO experienced midwives watching you very closely all the time, ready to act if anything appears untoward.
compare that to the hospital birth I had with ds1 when I saw a midwife approx every 15-20 mins max.

I am a HUGE advocate of homebirths, but I would also say that the best place to give birth is the place YOU feel comfortable in.
you need to be in an environment where you feel safe, secure and relaxed. if you're really worried about having a homebirth then you shouldn't have one.

No, I wouldn't for a first birth.

I was classified as a low risk pregnancy and encouraged to think about a home birth, but if I had gone ahead with it, my baby would have died and I might have died too. We had an emergency, impossible to predict beforehand and once the doctors realised what the problem was they had 5 minutes to get the baby out alive. We live a 30 minute drive away from the hospital so even an ambulance wouldn't have got us there.

I feel really bad writing this because I know it's not what you want to hear, but if it was me I would want to hear a balanced view from all perpsectives. My situation is rare, and I know most women have really good experiences of home births, but sometimes emergencies do happen in childbirth with very little warning.

Tuttifrutti may I ask what was the complication?

I had fibroids in my womb blocking the baby's exit route. They weren't picked up on the antenatal scans, and this wasn't the hospital's fault because they were on the back wall so couldn't be seen once the baby was there, blocking the view. In my second pregnancy I asked whether they could do a scan from a different position but they said no, it's only possible to do scans from the front and so you can only see what is in front of and directly to the side of the baby.

One in three women has fibroids, but I was just unlucky to get them in this position.

I wouldn't ever have a home birth, because I would be too afraid - which is my problem. Assuming that there are no contra-indications for a home birth I think that it comes down to where you feel happiest. For me that was hospital (and I wouldn't go to a midwife led unit). For others that might be a home birth. But don't tie yourself in knots at this stage in your pregnancy. You have plenty of time to make up your mind.

I agree with Belgo.

I had a risk free labour and went to a MLU to have my first. For your reasons, I just wanted to have gas and air and water and everything as relaxed as possible. Anyway, I had a fit with no preeclampsia prior to delivery in the 2nd stage and 2 more in the ambulance as I was being transferred to hospital on the other side of London (that's where the MLU was) and ended up being in for a week. We both came out the other side healthy and well and am currently almost 37 weeks with no 2. Obv have no choice but to go to hosp for this one, seems like its transverse so may even have the decision of whether or not to have it naturally taken out of my hands which is fine too.

Looking back I would have gone to hospital for the first and if all went well tried the rest at home or a MLU. Most hospitals have home from home centres now which are just around the corner from the full on ward should you need help.

30 miles is a long way if anything goes wrong.

If you have absolutely no fear and would love to give this a try and your pregnancy remains risk free then go for is, lots of the women above have positive experiences. But make sure it is 100% what you want.

My experience up to the fit was great with just gas and air, although my contractions did stop so I was going to have to be transferred to hosp for a drip anyway when the fit happened.

I would have your baby in the MLU.

My first pregnancy was textbook low risk and I booked a homebirth, was very keen to avoid hospitals and interventions at all costs. Our hospital was 25 miles away.

In the end, after 17 hours labour at home, I transfered to hospital for slow progress. I started to bleed as I walked in the door, my placenta had abrupted, a rare but totally unpredictable complication....I was zoomed into theatre for a section and, thank god,my DS was fine.

If we had insisted on staying home longer or had a longer journey, DS could have been brain damaged or died

I still feel guilty three years on about the risk I subjected him to.

Last year, I had by second child by VBAC at the same hospital and I it was very straightforward and totally drug free (ironically I really wanted them this labour but there was no time!!)

I don't want to scare or upset you but I just thought I should share this, obviously hundreds of women have wonderful, successful home births but things can still happen out of the blue like they did to me