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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Newly pregnant and terrified about birth already :(

12 replies

maybebaby23 · 27/04/2009 14:23

Hi everyone. I am almost 5 weeks pregnant..i know really early to be worrying about birth but i can't help it. I spent the whole of my last pregnancy worrying about it, then they told me DD was breech so i was booked in for a section. I really suffer with anxiety and during the section i had to have some kind of injection every few minutes to calm me as i was constantly on the edge of a panic attack (not good when you are numb from chest down...) Also throughout pregnancy my blood pressure was a bit high due to anxiety, my heart was always racing. So here i go again and i have calmed myself thinking that they may allow me to have another section. But now im not sure at all because im not exactly high risk am i im petrified, my negative mind will only cause problems in labour anyway so i feel im heading for a really scary time, possible emergency section or something awful. Does anyone have any advice. Do you think they won't even entertain me for a section as im only 23 and not high risk? I can picture myself on the floor begging the consultant...how pathetic am i!!! Thanks for reading x

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SoupDragon · 27/04/2009 14:25

If you have had a previous cs, you are very likely to be offered another.

MrsMattie · 27/04/2009 14:25

If you've had a previous section and want another one, most consultants will be fine with that, especially once you tell them how you feel.

You might want to think about some hypnobirthing/hypnotherapy classes, or getting a CD or a book at least. Really helped to clam my nerves.

Good luck x

MrsMattie · 27/04/2009 14:26

calm my nerves, even!

Gromit78 · 29/04/2009 13:04

This is my first baby and I confess that I am becoming more and more anxious about the birth as well. The unknown is always frightening.

My sister is a midwife and has suggested hypno/birthing. Unfortunately I cannot afford to have any sort of therapy so I will have to just think positive.

Here are a few things I plan to have/do during labour to try and prevent panic attacks.

1)Balance my biochemistry with vitimins. I believe the Vit B's and Magnesium can really hep as well as herbal tea like Chamomile.

2)Listen to music. I listen to music all the time and it calms me down, so does singing and playing the guitar.

3)Pray a lot. I intend to have my rosary to hand. It serves as a sort of mantra.

Go to my happy place. I have a strong imagination and have various dreams I enjoying day dreaming in. I fully intend to be 'somewhere else' whilst giving birth.

Hope these ideas will help inspire you to think positive about the experience.

Rebeccaj · 29/04/2009 14:43

I requested a CS section for my second birth, having had an elective for my first due to her being breech. I had no problem requesting one on the grounds of my phobia of birth - something I had had for years. So definitely talk to your consultant.

flooziesusie · 29/04/2009 15:24

You wont have any problems getting a second cs, but they may try and persuade you otherwise...

One thing to remember is that us girlies have been giving birth forever, where there's a will, there is usually a way!!

MrsMattie · 29/04/2009 15:27

I couldn't afford hypnobirthing classes, either, but used a CD bought from here. It really helped.

Snoopy99 · 29/04/2009 23:14

I had a c-section because he was breech and (though I was disappointed when they told me I couldnt have a natural birth) it wouldn't enter my head to have anything other for another child. If you want a c-section, then you need to demand it. And if you feel you can't, then you need to get your partner to fight on your behalf. Being married to a lawyer, no hospital in its right mind would put on paper that they had refused you a c-section when you specifically requested it for previous medical reasons and because you suffer from panic attacks. You are not being a pain or being selfish, if you think you need it then you are doing this for your baby. Ultimately, what matters is that you deliver a healthy baby and that you yourself are healthy as you can be during and afterwards.

dizzeelizzee · 30/04/2009 12:23

Im a doula and I think you really need to talk to someone (not necessarily a therapist) about your previous experience and your fears and worries.

Its really imporatnt to debrief your previous birth so you can move on.

Remember all the negatives to having another caesarian, you will have a longer recovery period and two children to deal with!

Perhaps if you could talk about your fears to someone who knows what they are talking about (MW, Dr, doula, therapist) you will be able to realise that every birth is different and that childbirth is a positive, natural experience.

If you really cant move past this then you should speak to your consultant and they may offer you an elective.

But surely its worth having a try to get past your fears just to make yourself feel better!

Best of luck x

Katelyn · 30/04/2009 12:33

I have no advice for you except I had a natural birth with my one and only child and it was absolutely lovely - i definately plan another natural delivery.

What is it that concerns you exactly, is it pain, problems occuring?

lljkk · 30/04/2009 12:53

I want to say that there are so many things to worry about in pregnancy that you really need to ration yourself. There's a lot else to fret about.

I suggest that you draw up a schedule & stick to it. Like so, Worry about:

Month1: getting pregnant (you can check this one off already)
M-2: What you can't eat or do
M-3: will 1st scan be ok?
M-4: When will you feel the baby move?
M-5: Will the 20 wk scan be ok?
M-6: Planning Phase I (like where baby will be born or will sleep?)
M-7: How to deal with heartburn, piles, stretchmarks, weirdos groping bump...
M-8: Planning Phase II
M-9: Is everything going ok?

I am only partly joking. See how the birth gets organised at earliest in Month 6, let yourself bury head in sand on that issue until then, I reckon.

Original poster

maybebaby23 · 30/04/2009 14:16

Thanks for the replies! Feeling much better after reading those saying i should be able to have another elective, thankyou We will have to wait and see though i hope you are right. Gromit78, thanks for your input, i think its a good idea to be elsewhere during birth as well lol seriously if i have to try vbac i will consider your ideas thanks.
Snoopy99 thanks for your support!
Ok its not the pain i am worried about (i for one know how painful it is after a section so wouldn't want to go there if it was pain i was worried about!) Im seriously worried about my scar ruptering as 2 close friends had this happen last year, one resulting in the death of the baby terrible. They can't tell me this is so rare and won't happen!! Also im worried that the midwives will not take me seriously if things get a bit out of control and i am asking to call it a day and go for a section. They didn't listen to my friend and she lost her baby because they didn't take action. I don't want to be in all that pain, not thinking straight and sure i need a section then they don't listen. Im getting panicky just thinking of it!! Surely a calm repeat elective where i am aware of all the risks etc is a much better experience for me and my baby than all the stress and worry of a vbac? I just know the consultant won't understand, i dread the whole conversation with him. Thanks for taking the time to reply x

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