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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Is it too late to tell the midwife I want home birth?

26 replies

helpneededplease · 19/04/2009 20:17

I am 35&2 with dd2 and after a long deliberation have decided that we want to have a home birth. I hadn't mentioned it to the midwife before now as my husband wasn't keen, and I am worried that they will tell me it's too late for this option.

I was going to ring them tomorrow but am feeling a bit nervous now about what they will say - you know how it is with all of these hormones!!!

Any ideas?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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FrannyandZooey · 19/04/2009 20:19

they may tell you all kinds of things but you can have your baby where you choose
i knew i wanted hb but was not booked in until 37 weeks so there's no reason they can't do it now

ShowOfHands · 19/04/2009 20:21

I knew I wanted a hb from the start. MW didn't even discuss it until I was 36 weeks as it's only advisable after 37 weeks.

You should be fine. If you want a hb, tell them that's what you would like.

greatwhiteshark · 19/04/2009 20:21

Never too late, until you're actually at the hospital in labour! They might not like it, but that's not the point. On the other hand, if, like in our NHS Trust, they're trying to up the homebirth rate, they'll be chuffed to bits!

Original poster

helpneededplease · 19/04/2009 20:25

Thanks guys for putting my mind at rest. I'll sleep better tonight now!!

OP posts:

Lio · 19/04/2009 20:26

I decided at about 36 weeks. F&Z is right on the money, you can do whatever you choose. Hope the conversation goes well and you feel supported.

19fran76 · 19/04/2009 21:34

Good luck! I found homebirth to be a positive experience, hope that you will too. As previous posters have said, it is your choice. I was also booked in for it my my midwife at around 36 weeks.

19fran76 · 19/04/2009 21:35

Doh! By my midwife.

Heathcliffscathy · 19/04/2009 21:36

it is never too late.

nothing can happen without your consent. at all.

duchesse · 19/04/2009 21:43

No, not at all. You do need to tell them soon though so they can bring the delivery pack and G&A round.

BunnyLebowski · 20/04/2009 08:43

NO! You do not have to ask for permission or go with the assumption you'll have you baby in hospital!

As Franny says you can have your baby where YOU choose to!

Tell them as soon as you can so that the practicalities can be sorted.

Duchesse - I had nothing delivered before the birth! Midwives brought all the equipment and gas and air with them. Just had the pool blown up!

I decided on a home birth very early on and when I went to my 20 week scan the nurse (without asking) filled in the "where having the baby" section on my notes with the name of the hospital.

I asked her why she would assume that and fill it in without asking and proceeded to score it out and write "HOME" in block capitals!

Reesie · 20/04/2009 20:11

Nope - not too late at all! In our trust we don't start planning our home births until 36 weeks and you can't have one until you are 37 weeks plus (you're deemed premature until then).

Home births are lovely and we midwives love them!!!!!

Reesie · 20/04/2009 20:12

PS - midwives love chocolate biscuites at home births! Especially the ones with really thick chocolate or caramel!

froggy16 · 21/04/2009 09:55

I've been told I can't have a home birth until 39 weeks, which I'm gutted about as my first two were born at 37 and 38 weeks. I really want a home water birth, but as I 'm not sure I'll make it I don't want to buy a birth pool, but if I do reach 39 weeks it will be too late to get one arghhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
But it's been on my notes since 18 weeks I want a home birth.

duchesse · 21/04/2009 11:27

froggy- is that decision based on your baby medical needs? Or have they just drawn that number from a hat? Can you challenge them about this, given that so many health authorities deem 37 weeks onwards to be fine?

froggy16 · 21/04/2009 12:09

No it's nothing to do with baby, all they said was they don't come out before 39 weeks, it used to be 38 weeks, only last year when my SIL had hers. They didn't really give a reason. I don't really get on with my midwife, she's a bit vague about everything and thinks she knows best, though the more I think about it the more upset I get, so I may ask next app., which is on 30th.

spinspinsugar · 21/04/2009 12:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

19fran76 · 21/04/2009 12:44

Request a change of midwife froggy if you don't feel she is in support of your choice to have a homebirth. As reesie says most midwives love them. It is important to feel that anyone attending the birth is onside if possible P.S. Good tale spinsugar

foxytocin · 21/04/2009 13:00

froggy they cannot deny you a hwb based on what happened in your prev pg or because they have changed their policy. as long as you have a normal, healthy pg and you choose to stay home during labour, they have a duty of care to send a midwife.

gardeningmum05 · 21/04/2009 13:10

i had a home birth, purely by accident. i went into labour, couldnt get down the stairs for the pain, and when finally got to my DP who was engrossed in the footy on the tele, my waters burst. he dialled 999, they arrived with a minute to spare. the guy my DP spoke to on the phone for the ambulance told him he may have to deliver the baby..it was worth the pain to see the look on his face
anyway, my point is it was heaven getting into my own bed that night, with a cup of tea
go for your home birth!!!!!

Original poster

helpneededplease · 21/04/2009 21:23

I spoke to the midwife yesterday and she was really positive about the whole thing. She is coming round on Monday to have a chat. We have also decided to get a birth pool in a box so I am feeling great about the whole thing.
Thank you for the support.

OP posts:

Ohforfoxsake · 21/04/2009 21:25

Wonderful!

I'm really pleased for you. Homebirths are just fantastic.

floraflora · 21/04/2009 21:43

Birth Pool in a Box - FAB! I loved mine and the design is even better now.
Don't forget to stock fridge and freezer with lots of nice food to keep the midwives going - they do really appreciate it.
If you want gas and air and they do deliver the cylinders beforehand - check they're not empty! Happened to a friend of mine.
Having a home birth is such a good way of getting really good midwife care.
Good luck.

froggy16 · 22/04/2009 14:45

Thank you Foxytocin, thats good to know!

What kind of food do you class as nice food for midwifes floraflora?

floraflora · 01/05/2009 21:03

I'll have to ask DP what the midwives actually ate in the end - I was too spaced out to know!
Good luck.

Whiteybaby · 02/05/2009 09:45

i had a home birth and we had chocolate biscuts, my mum's brownies and flapjacks and loads of tea ! I asked at my antenatal check once I got to 37 weeks what the preference was for. Proper food deemed not needed and biccies the main request! I bought a couple of big boxes of fox's selection so something for everyone. Luckily my dd was a week early as had already opened one of them in pregnancy induced chocolate cravings - any longer and there could have been none left!
At my check a couple of days after the bith the midwives asked for the brownie recipe! Fab experience all round and ditto on love of pool in a box..

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