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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Unsure about labour......

11 replies

cici84 · 19/02/2009 21:14

Hi,

can anyone please give me any good tips or advice about labour... i don't mind hearing about the horror side of it too... i'm just so scared i don't know what to do for the best....

7 years ago i had to have an emergancy c-section, as there was complications with my pregnancy and i delievered at 33 and half weeks... sadly the rest of that experience didn't have a happy ending.

I guess i'm just scared, sorry if this all over the place, my mind has a million things running through it.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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scrooged · 19/02/2009 21:17

Just go with the flow. Your body will tell you when it needs to push, it's alot like wanting to poo a housebrick. Listen to the midwives. If you tell them about your c-section they will help you and be supportive.

Original poster

cici84 · 19/02/2009 21:20

My Midwife does know about the c-section and so do the hospital staff, as they have said they want me to go for a natural birth this time, but will only leave me for so long before making me have another c-section due to the scar tissue.

OP posts:

scrooged · 19/02/2009 21:37

It can be so hard to have trust in them, especially after what happened before but they really do know their stuff. Please do talk to them if you are still worried. The best bit of advice I can give to you is just go with the low. Don't have any expectations, just be adaptable. Childbirth is on of the few times in your life when it's your body that takes over rather then your brain. You have a certain amount of control but at the end of the day, your body will do whatever comes naturally to it. Go with this but listen to the staff.

Original poster

cici84 · 19/02/2009 21:40

Thank you so much, would u say take all the pain relieve you can get, or just certain types?

OP posts:

dinkystinky · 19/02/2009 21:42

Cici - I'd really advise reading "childbirth without fear" by Dick Grantly Read - it explains what happens physiolgically during labour and takes away alot of the fear about a natural birth. I wish I'd read it beore I had DS1 - I read it before having DS2 last week and it made a huge difference (as well as practicing hypnobirthing to help me distance DS2's birth from DS1's birth experience, which really worked). It gave me the confidence to listen to my body - and it did its job... I'd recommend looking into a doula if you can afford it (trainee doulas work out very cheap) as you can then have someone there who knows you, your past experience and supports you through out (before, during and after your labour) and will help ensure the midwives listen to your concerns and you give birth in your "comfort zone". Congratulations- and good luck.

SnowlightMcKenzie · 19/02/2009 21:46

cici84 I would say do as much research as you can. Pain relief is one persons saviour, but another person's nightmare.

All forms of pain relief have side effects. Depending on who you are and how you deal with things they are either worth it or not worth it.

One thing is for sure though and that is that being scared works against your body. You probably have to work harder than most to deal with this given your past experiences.

Are you pg now? And if so, how far?

scrooged · 19/02/2009 21:48

Pain relief is a personal thing. I had whatever I could get , some of my friends opted for nothing so it's how you see this. I was induced so it was no pain to lots in a few minutes so my natural endomorphins didn't have time to kick in. I tried gas and air, I still had the pain but it was giggly 'I'm floating and laughing off my head' pain. Pethidine didn't really do much, ds needed an injection after birth because of this and I didn't have time for an epidural. I know that this can take away some of the control that you have, without it you can feel the contractions and you know when to push, with it you are reliant on the midwives to tell you when to do this, in hindesight, I'm pleased I didn't have it, even though I didn't know this at the time.
Do whatever's comfortable for you, do what you are happy with. There are lots of other types of pain relief, TENS, hypnotherapy, do some investigating. It does help if you are relaxed so find something that works for you.

Original poster

cici84 · 19/02/2009 21:51

Hey SnowlightMcKenzie

I only have 8 weeks left, which i do hope will fly by, as i feel like a hippo.

I try not to worry about things, and my wonderful Fiance is fantastic, he calms me down when i start worrying.

I guess part of me just wants another c-section as i can remember what i went through, but then i also want to be able to say i've experienced a natural birth.

My Mum wishes she could of had me natural but she wasn't able to.

are my fears normal, or am i worrying over nothing?

OP posts:

EllieG · 19/02/2009 21:54

Have an epidural the moment you can. I was all for natural labour, but then the pain kicked in.....oh my god, I discovered I have a very low pain threashold. The moment I was 4cm dilated asked for epidural and it worked like a dream. Labour was fine, got some kip, when time came to push we laughed through it and she was out in 45 mins. My epidural was particularly good though - I could still move and feel to push but with no pain, and I understand not everyone's work that well.

I also got them to top it up every time I felt any pain - me - 'Nurse! I'm feeling something! Can i have some more please?'

Oh - and other tip is make sure you do a poo beforehand.

SnowlightMcKenzie · 19/02/2009 22:00

cici84 I can assure you at least that your fears are normal, even if you hadn't had your past experiences.

EVERY woman gets the heebie-jeebies in late pregnancy, even if they've given birth to an army. It's no small deal after all.

Do you have any planned strategies for dealing with early labour. i.e. pre-drugs, and pre-hospital?

I'd suggest you think about them and practice. They may well do you for the whole thing.

Tangle · 19/02/2009 23:02

Sounds like you've had a rough time of it - it would be more suprising if you weren't stressing

Have you considered doing any kind of hypnotherapy? I used the natal hypnotherapy CD's before DD was born - I don't know if they helped, but if nothing else they gave me a good excuse to lie down and relax for a while every day. When it came to the birth I felt very calm and centred, aware of going on but not phased by it - I almost became an observer. I do think that being able to let me body do what it needed to do without my brain getting too involved probably helped, but whether that was due to the CDs or not I'll never know.

Pain relief is a very personal choice, partly because every woman's experience of labour will be different, and their experience of labour with each child will be different. No-one can predict whether your labour will be painfull or painfree. If you're not sure you want lots of chemical pain relief then I'd try to go with the flow and see where it takes you.

I'd also 2nd the suggestion to get a doula or even an independent midwife if you can afford it. There are various things that have been identified that can result in a better birth experience, but the one that comes out on top is an experienced female birth supporter that you know and trust. I used IMs - DD was 9lb 12 and breech but I had confidence in them and felt that they had confidence in me and my body, all of which generated a very positive environment where I felt very safe and cared for.

Fingers crossed things go smoothly for you from here on in.

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