Third degree tear, 12 weeks on... Is this discomfort normal? (probably TMI)

[TheHopefullyAndTheIvy]

Had a very fast labour with DS (first baby), and partly due to him coming at high speed and probably partly due to me panicking and pushing like a mad woman when perhaps I could have taken it a little slower, I had a third degree tear.

Had a couple of totally agonising horrendous weeks, and things slowly began to improve, and the consultant was happy with my recovery at 6 week check, but I'm still far from pain free.

My girl bits aren't really uncomfortable, although I haven't dared insert so much as a finger, never mind anything else, so I haven't exactly tested that!
However, despite still being on lactulose, going to the toilet is enormously uncomfortable, and there's always a bit of blood (sometimes a drop, sometimes a fair bit more, but not loads). I was lucky enough to get piles as well as the tear, which could be to blame I suppose?
Also, as I look at my stitches, the line is very neat and beautifully healed almost all the way back to my bottom, and then the last couple of milimetres looks far more lumpy and messy, and is very very tender after the aforesaid toilet trauma.
Finally, if I go for a long walk, I have a real uncomfortable tender ache around the whole area.

Does this sound reasonable 12 weeks down the line? None of it is remotely cripplingly painful, and I'm happy to give it a couple more weeks to heal before bothering anyone, but just wondering whether I'm doing the right thing leaving it longer.

My face was when they told me I could have a CS for any future pregnancies!

Sadly that's reasonable for a 3rd degree tear. I was in pain while walking for months. And I've read a lot of threads on here from women who felt the same.

Are your hemorrhoid still really swollen and puffed up? That could account for the bleeding. Hang on one sec, gotta settle DS.

OK, for haemorrhoids, get some witch hazel andsome viitamin E oil capsules. Bite the capsules open and spread the oil on the haemorrhoids and also on the lumpy swollen bits of your scar. This helps to reabsorb the clotted blood in the haemorrhoids. Pour some witch hazel on a cotton wad and tuck it around the anus. Witch hazel is an anti-inflammatory and helps with any swelling.

Gosh, I have to stop hitting "post" when I mean "enter"

I had to laugh when I saw the part about C/S for next baby --- I bet that was good to hear!!!

Now, about the pain with walking, that'll be due to nerve injury. When you tear, and are subsequently repaired, there's some injury to branches of the pudendal nerve. Unfortunately that can take months to years to heal. I had that "I've been kicked in the crotch" ache for about six months, maybe longer. I can't remember when exactly it faded. And I love walking so that was a real pain. Now remember everyone's different and you could heal faster than that so don't let me discourage you.
Oh, forgot to say, had 36 hr labour with DS, 4 hours of pushing followed by episiotomy and forceps and a massive tear in the back wall of my vagina. So I know about your horrendously agonizing weeks. I couldn't stand fully upright for six weeks.

I think it was four months before I dared fully explore down there, including the inside. (Shudder.)
This may be too personal but are you having any incontinence? Because, horribly, that can be "normal" after a 3rd degree tear, too.

And - CONGRATULATIONS on your l.o.!!

Thanks for the congratulations, and the words of wisdom!

I am lucky enough not to have any incontinence (although my pelvic floor is far from what it was, so when I need to go, I need to go), for which I am very grateful..
I also love walking (and DS loves sleeping in the pram), so that pain is probably the most irritating.

Thanks for the tip for the evil piles, will try that - anything to make them a bit less horrible!

Lucky DS is so cute, or I'd be really pissed off

I'm right there with you... looking at my DS was the only thing that made it a bit better.

About your pelvic floor, there is a tool called an Educator, made in Lancashire, that can help. www.mobilishealthcare.com/neen/p-6851-pelvic-floor-educator.aspx
That was the only thing that helped me, my pelvic floor was so shot after 4 hrs of pushing that I couldn't feel a sodding thing for months. The "when I have to, I have to go NOW" thing is really common, too.

Have you tried sitting on a hot pack (one of those microwavable bean bag thingies) for comfort? That helped the pain so much for me. I nuked it before nursing DS, got comfortable on it, and both he and I felt better.

There are a bunch of threads about injuries during birth. Let me know if you want links to them. But they can be a bit scary and upsetting, and if you're doing mostly ok, you might not want that much TMI.

I had my DS 12 weeks ago, and like you, got a 3rd degree tear from pushing when I shouldn't have! I have an anal fissure I think, still bleeds and hurts like a bitch when I poo. No words of wisdom but you are not alone!

Hey kat are you on this thread too?
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/529999-spincter-injury-fistula-support-eachother
Thehopefully, this may be TMI for you but maybe not.
xxx

no but I'll check it out! Thanks

Ooh, I've just googled the anal fissure (wow, my google search history is so glamorous) and it sounds v similar to what I've got and how things look. might have to investigate further.

jacks if you can link to any of those other threads I'd be interested to read them - I'm mostly dealing with the emotional trauma of it all, so it would be interesting to read how others are coping.

First of all congratulations on your new baby TheHopefully, but huge sympathy that you're having to go through this. I'm another one who's had a third degree tear so I can totally relate to everything you've described. It took months for me to feel better and apparently, even after a year I still had a lot of bruising and swelling. It took about 8 months for my stitches to dissolve which didnt help! I'm hoping that things improve for you much quicker than they did for you. I had problems with walking too, I remember feeling so bloody depressed the first time I went for a walk with my new baby. It was an experience I'd dreamt about when I was pregnant and had visions of me strolling round town with my new baby girl, radiant with happiness and blooming after the birth. How naieve! Instead I hobbled round town, barely able to cope with the pain. But things did get better and I can honestly say I have no problems walking now (thank god!)

What I would say though, is that if you feel you're not getting any better please please go to your gp and demand a referral to a gynae, there is so much they can do these days to help with recovery like physio, injections for scarring etc Wish I'd pushed my gp for some of these things (though I didnt know about mumsnet then, wish I had, things could have been so different...).

Hey Jacksmama, have seen lots of posts from you recently on this topic but don't think we've ever "spoken"! I've posted lots on the birth injury thread too.

Hi theautomatic, yes, I've seen your posts - nice to "meet" you . I had a lot of counselling because of DS's birth and thought that one way of moving past the bloody trauma of it would be to help other women with information... some days it works... some days it sends me back into a tailspin, especially when the stories are abut complications that could have been avoided with listening to a labouring mother and some compassion!! Oops, back off my soapbox

TheHopefully, here are some links for you:
Another labour gone wrong...

Forceps: a little poll

Support thread for sphincter injuries and fistulae

C-section for no. 3 or try VBAC?
www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=childbir th&threadid=582164-birth-trauma-support-thread#11880931 Birth Trauma Support Thread]]
I've lurked on this one but haven't posted. Simply because if I did, I'd want to tell the whole story, and atm, I don't have the strength and don't get enough me-time. Wouldn't want to start crying halfway through and freak out DH. ;)

Some of these are pretty intense. If they get to you, come back and we'll give you lots of un-MN-like (((HUGS))).

TheHopefully,
I had exactly the same as you and when i looked the scar had healed and the Consultant was happy but it was still excruciating to poo for several months after. I'm certain it was an anal fissure as I had all the symptoms. i think they are pretty common after childbirth. I did go back to GP and they referred me to hospital but nothing came of it and the consultant didn't seem very bothered and by that time the pain and discomfort had lessened a lot.
At my 6 week check they said I could have CS next time and I am now pg again and when I went back to see Consultant they refused me a CS and said they didn't treat women who'd torn any differently to women who hadn't! I probably could have pushed for one but I accepted the decision and just hope it doesn't happen again.

Unfortunately I think its fairly common to suffer for such a long time after a 3rd degree tear. I would say mine took nearing on a year to heal fully although 2.5 years later and its still not great down there. My consultant says I might need official repair after this next baby (due in April) and I'm being referred to pysio for my continence problems.

For info despite all the problems I had from my 3rd degree tear I am still having a vaginal birth this time. The risks of csection for me are way too high for me. Also as this would be a 2nd cs for me the risks are even higher. IMO a cs isn't the easy option and I'd rather risk another tear than go for the gauranteed cut of a cs. But thats just me.

Hi,
I know this is a dormant thread. But I am suffering from a third degree tear and an 7 weeks PP. I am still in pain when I even stand up for more than 5 minutes. I also have urinary incontinence. How long does the pain last ? I am almost bed ridden because of this and am unable to take care of my baby. Can you also tell me how long the incontinence lasted for you ? Badly in need of some motivation ☹️