Third Labour - have heard they can be 'tricky' or is this a myth??

[frazzledoldbag34]

Hi. Am pg with DC3. Had easy 9 hour labour with DD1. Had horrible 18 hour labour with DD2 (almost ended up with emergency c/s for failure to progress - was 4cm for 12 hours in active labour with HORRIFIC contractions. Had normal delivery in the end but was an awful labour).
So am now worried about my 3rd labour (still a long way off but worrying already). I have heard that third babies can be more difficult labours than the previous 2........not sure why this might be but anyway would love some opinions/experience from you lot............(by the way I was really relaxed going into my 2nd labour as the first had been pretty easy - only found it really hard for about the last half hour first time around so was expecting quicker and easier the second.)

I heard this with my

3rd- born within 2 hours of hosp
my 4th -homebirth no probs and
5th - slipped out in one push, hardly a drop of blood loss!

Dont worry - just enjoy

3rd ones are like shelling peas.

(Well, IME anyway!)

easier for me, actually too fast

DD1 - 4h20m second degree tear
DD2 - 2h30m no tears
DD3 - 1h35m shot out in 2 pushes second degree tear, horrendous afterpains though

3rd one yes like shelling peas, but unpredictable - ds1 went as a textbook first labour, ds2 same but condensed into about an hour and a half, DD [#3] slow labour, two days and nights fo starting and stopping then got stuck at 5cm or thereabouts, they had to break my waters and from there on it was gas and air for a bit, baby!! all seemed rather random IME. Just that you have to appreciate that all labours and births are different, and anything that you think you've got "sussed", well, erm, you haven't actually

giggle - I think that's what I'm worried about! I like to plan and I like to be organised about these things. Last time I thought I knew what it would be like (like DD1's labour only faster) and I was just SO wrong. So this time I just can't contemplate it being any WORSE. And daren't hope it will be better. Am actually just being pathetic probably as of course they are all different. I'm just a bit scared .
Am even vaguely considering a doula or independent midwife option but live in Scotland and I don't think there are many around me. (DH was brilliant support in 1st labour. He was bored and slept through most of my 2nd labour and was quite frankly rubbish. Maybe that has something to do with my different labour??? Or is that just making him the scape-goat?)
Thanks for sharing your experiences though..............

My 3rd was faster than my first 2 but also more painful than my first 2.

Wasn't tricky though - just 4 hours from first pain to giving birth, only 2 hrs in hospital prior to having her and with no pain releif.

Good luck

try not to panic. sounds like you had my experience of #3 for your second - so have perhaps more clue about how things can go than folk like me who have two similar [just different paced] labours then wtf with number3.you're probably far more clued up and no3 will be a dream for you!
[fingers x'd for you!} Good luck!
BTW, when is dc3 due?

Not due till May 09!!!!!!!
So am worrying perhaps a little prematurely.
But as I said, I like to be organised.........sitting here tonight just worrying about everything. And if I do go for independent mw etc I should prob start researching soon. I wouldn't have considered it with the other 2 but as I said, nervous about this time already.
[looks on the bright side - maybe it'll just fall out with no pain at all]
Thanks x

By the way, my mother had no labour pains at all with either my brother or me. Both times they told her she wasn't in labour as had painless tightenings only. Then when her waters broke and the head immediately appeared they had to agree with her that yes, perhaps she might be in labour!
Why oh why did I not inherit this?
So not fair

you are a control freak, just like me

try to do lots of talking with your mw and doctors, so that they can support you properly. I know you're at the "worry" point atm and things may alter, but it's better that they're all aware of where you're up to.

Nothing wrong with a bit of control freakery
Thanks for the advice.
x

My 3rd was the only one I didn't need ventouse for as the cord was around the neck with the other 2, so was definitely easier in that respect! Was quicker, only 3 1/2 hours from when my waters broke. I was really worried about it before, I think knowing what to expect can be worse than not knowing, especially if like you, you had a hard time with one of the previous births. But you did it twice so you'll do it again. Maybe provide lots of things for your DH so he doesn't get a chance to fall asleep?
Enjoy your pregnancy until then!

My third was fast - I did feel a bit out of control as I expected it to follow the pattern of my previous two births. Expect the unexpected. Good luck!

Thanks. I think you're right and knowing what it might be like can be worse than blissful ignorance or even fear of the unknown first time around.
And I do remember (in both of my labours actually) telling myself
'Remember this. This is awful. NEVER, EVER do this again.'
Both times I made this mental note I was pushing the baby out. And I'm doing it again! I must be mental.

But then I just LOVE that moment when the baby is just out and she snuggles up and looks you in the eye and you just melt and you can't believe that they're yours. [wipes away tears and sniffles]
And then you don't care about the pain anymore
Am looking forward to that bit.