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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

scared to have sex after childbirth

7 replies

mama2leah · 13/09/2008 15:52

my labour wasnt a badlabour, i did really well..jus gas and air for last bit..
but i tore badly, and got stitches...labial...

but now im suddenly scared to have sex..it still feels raw and sore down dere, citrois hurts (TMI)

an1 else had this?

OP posts:
BitOfFun · 13/09/2008 15:57

How long has it been since the birth? You still sound a bit too sore.

I had a bad tear with second dd, but was healed up enough within a fortnight - just be slow, a bit pissed, and stop if it's agony...Feeling scared with make you tense, so give yourself enough time to heal physically, and try to relax (easier said than done perhaps?). It's worth getting it out of the way so to speak, or it can become a bigger issue than it needs to be from what I've read on here, and then the worry can go on for months.

Good luck!

mama2leah · 13/09/2008 16:00

7 weeks post birth

OP posts:
BitOfFun · 13/09/2008 16:02

I'd get your fanjo checked out, referral if necessay, cos GPs can be crap (mine was - I saw him write "healed with unfortunate cosmetic result" in my notes, and felt like a freak ) but the lady gynae consultant was very reassuring. It's worth it if you are still in pain x

mama2leah · 13/09/2008 16:16

i went a&e for another reason, gayne sed healin ok...im scared...

OP posts:
Buckets · 13/09/2008 16:32

Hiya

Fair enough you're scared!
I had forceps which bruises inside plus stitches and it was really quite painful when I first tried it (just under 4wks after labour.) Am lucky to have understanding DH who let me control everything - managed to have an orgasm even but of course had to stop immediately after, poor DH. Just tried again at nearly 6wks and it was much better, reckon I'm 90% healed now.

If you do try it, you need a large glass of wine, some KY jelly and of course a condom (because yes you can get pg when breastfeeding.) And a DH who will go down on you as long as you need to feel confident and sexy again .

Good luck.

MingMingtheWonderPet · 13/09/2008 16:42

7 weeks doesn't sound taht long to me, we waited longer than that!
Breastfeeding, broken sleep etc did not make me feel atall sexy. Also I was SH*T scared of getting pregnant again.

Agree with the large glass of wine, and maybe a bath to relax.
It will happen, and it will be great again.

frogthistle · 25/09/2008 14:06

And just to make you really feel better. After DD1's birth it was 9 months before we did the deed! Not going into details but it was still bloody sore & I am still surprised that dd2 came along at all.

I tore again with DD2 but I think the MW was much more skilled at stitching. It was about 2 months that time.

Don't worry, everything's normal!

Good luck, FT

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