Post C-Section

[LaurenW2627]

3 days ago, I had my little boy who I am completely obsessed with. My birthing plan didn’t go how I would have liked. I went in to be induced but with my contractions not being close enough together, not dilating past 4cm and baby boy being in an awkward position, I had an emergency C-Section.
I am so glad that both me and baby are safe but now I just can’t seem to stop crying. I have the guilt of not being able to do a lot for my baby. I have the guilt of what if I waited and wasn’t induced, would things have been different. Also, when I cry, I can’t stop and I sob. No one has mentioned this part to me before. I’m not sure if this is normal or whether I need to seek advice.

Bless you OP sending love and hugs. Both the feelings around his birth and the crying sound normal. But it's worth mentioning to your midwife. After birth there is a massive hormonal shift which often causes sadness and crying for a few days. And emcs often cause feelings of guilt / regret / what ifs. I had one with my first and it gradually got better over time but in the early days it felt all consuming and very important (it is) but it gradually shifts into perspective as your little one gets older. Lean on all the support you have, focus on feeding and bonding and nothing else. Do you have a supportive partner and/or family?

Baby blues are absolutely typical for day three so it could just be that. Your hormones are crashing on their way back to normal. If you continue to feel bad then you may need to talk to someone about it as it can be difficult to tell you have post-natal depression when you’re in the middle of it. You should also find tomorrow that you’re a bit more able to move around. If you don’t overdo things then it will get easier every day. My tip is don’t watch any comedies for the first couple of weeks as laughing can hurt your stitches! It is hard to come back mentally from an unexpected EMCS and all the things you thought giving birth would be like. Be kind to yourself and don’t let anyone tell you it’s wrong to feel a certain way. I have had three EMCS and it’s just something I’ve had to come to terms with. Best wishes to you and congratulations on your little boy.

Congratulations on your new baby.

Firstly day 3 is the pits hormone wise. Most women find themselves crying over something or nothing on day 3. Be kind to yourself.

If you feel it would be helpful to process it all you can ask for a birth debrief in a few weeks. Make a note to raise with the community midwife or HV.

Your baby will be fine even if physically you can’t do a lot right now. Presumably your partner is on paternity leave to help you? Have you got decent pain relief and are you taking them on a schedule?

You did the absolute best thing for your baby. I had 2 emergency sections, my dc are now 24 & 20 and I remember those days where I felt like you do now, I rarely give them a second thought now and haven’t for many many years, I’ve been too busy loving them and truly enjoying bringing them up.

If you’re otherwise fit and healthy, you’ll probably find that in a week you’ll be able to do far more than you expect, I was moving around easily pretty quickly. The thing is, don’t push yourself until you’re ready and be kind to yourself, you aren’t failing anyone, not your baby and not yourself.

Congratulations on your baby.

Thank you all so much for your replies and advice. I do have a supportive husband and supportive family members who are helping as much as they can. Hopefully, as I start to heal, I’ll start to feel better.

Yeah crying a lot 3-4 pp is common however the baby comes out.

Give it time.
Once the wound is more healed make sure to get silicone strips.

Congrats on the baby!!!

Oh OP, have a huge and gentle hug. I am a midwife and I can assure you, as others I’ve said, day 3 is the day we call the baby blues. Your pregnancy hormones are changing to lactation and it can feel terribly overwhelming.

With regards to your your C section, sometimes baby’s just aren’t in a great position and nothing we or you can do can change that. It is completely normal for women think what if after a birth didn’t go to plan (I absolutely did with my birth). Please reach out for support from your midwife x

Yes also came to say that day 3 is very typical to feel emotional and teary. You've done loads for your baby already, you've grown him and nourished him with your body and right now, it's your time to do what you can but let your husband take a leading role too. Mum guilt is the worst but try and be kind to yourself- there is no way of knowing how things would have gone if you weren't induced, birth is not something that always go to plan.

I would say it is normal to feel this way at this point but be open with your loved ones about how you feel and do speak to your midwife/health visitor if you need support.