What to expect from a birth reflections appointment after an EMCS

[Gerbera55]

I’ve managed to get a birth reflections appointment, I gave birth via EMCS after a long induction process 8 months ago.
Has anyone had one? What can I expect? Did it help?

it very much depends on what you want to get from it - it's driven by you rather than the hospital.

Fair point - I have questions surrounding why my induction was allowed to go on for so long rather than having a conversation around alternatives and given I was induced due ro
concerns with baby.

I had one after my first birth during covid. The midwife talked through my notes/ asked me what I remembered and helped me understand what had happened, why and when. It really helped me understand, especially as she validated how I was feeling (ignored in labour basically)

So yes, it really helped me

Thank you - I’d definitely appreciate some validation because I have found myself questioning if it was even that bad.

I think time helps too, but just understanding the what happened and why it happened really did give me a lot of peace. Birth trauma is not talked about very much but it is very real. Also keep talking with friends about the birth if you feel up to it

I had one, and the midwife was kind and listened, but part of my unhappiness was the way I’d been treated by another midwife, and she was very quiet and didn’t really respond to that. I’d hoped for some support with my feelings about it, but I didn’t get that.

I had one and it was great. The consultant went through absolutely everything with me and really helped explain things.

I had one and it was awful. Just dragged up all the memories and didn't give any answers or closure. To be fair there wasn't really much for them so say other than "yeah we got that a bit wrong" but I already knew that, and there's no changing the past.

I'm glad to hear many others have done better though, so is likely that my experience is a rare negative one. 🤞

I can’t lie, I’ve also been worrying that it will make me feel worse because they can’t change what happened.

I think it depends what you want out of it. It’s not a complaints service, so if part of what you want is to complain, it won’t help. If you want clarification about what happened, or the reason why decisions were made, then it might be beneficial for you

I’m hoping it will help me to decide whether I should complain or not.