Best advice for new mums

[TeamMeerkat]

My baby is nearly 2 now but I saw a thread on what the best thing to buy a new mum is, and it got me to think about all the (often unsolicited) advice I got when I had my baby.

What advice would you give? I'm not talking about "sleep when the baby sleeps". Mine are as follows:

• download the huckleberry app - when the midwives come round asking how many wet nappies the baby has had or how theyre feeding, you can consult that instead of trying to remember when you dont even know what time/day it is

• get some jelonet burn dressings and bamboo breast pads - this was told to me by an amazing midwife after I complained about nipple trauma while my baby struggled to breastfeed effectively and pumps comped my nipples into pieces. Healed within 2 days!

3. get bedside snacks - especially if breastfeeding. I especially appreciated chocolate Brioche rolls.

For most people this is really unsuitable and hugely increases the risk of prolapse as it's adding extra pressure on an already weak pelvic floor.

I'd say don't make your life difficult by worrying about the future, when it comes to sleep - for example, spending hours in a dark room trying to make your baby nap in their cot. They will at some point, and if they don't, it doesn't matter. If it works to get the most sleep, just do it.

The best advice I ever recieved was from a lovely health visitor. She said you don't have to be perfect, you don't have to be amazing, you don't even have to be good, you just need to be good enough. It got me through the harder days.

I think it probably depends upon the circumstances of the birth, but it's advice I was given too late.

I hated when people told me that.

Totally with you on not worrying about housework etc! But when you have a newborn that needs to feed every 3 hours, then for me because I needed to express milk her sleeping time was taken up by expressing/washing and sanitising pumps and bottles etc.

Don't bother arguing with advice. Nod, smile and then go with your own instincts. When in doubt, listen to a qualified doctor - ie someone with at least 7 years medical training. You know your baby better than anyone else.

Honestly, don’t overthink it, follow your instincts and to a certain extent, wing it.

I hate anything to do with an app connected to baby raising. Just don’t get it.

Don’t start off with stuff like white noise, special night lights, pram rockers etc. Obviously if you’re in the trenches and struggling to get them to sleep and you introduce something that works then that’s great, but don’t plan to use all that from the start.

Don’t over stress about temperature of room and how many layers, and togs etc. You’ll get to know your baby and will know when they’re too hot or cold.

I think the rise of social media etc is a powerful tool for shared experiences of motherhood and feeling like you’re not alone. But I also think it’s an absolute recipe for comparison and total overthinking of everything to do with babies.