Midwives/ doulas - what WAS this????

[Minicooper]

My dd is now 6 months old and I'm just starting to come out of the fog and think about possibility of doing this again! My labour was ok-ish - long - a 24 hour labour - dd was back to back, which, I understand, is often more painful than usual ( 1st pg, so have nothing to compare it to!) The thing is that out of the whole long, painful labour, the bit that is the sticking point for me is the internal examinations - my first midwife gave me 2 and they were painful beyond belief. It was the only part of the labour that made me vomit. The only way I could describe it to dh was that it was like going through a wilderness - I could hardly believe I'd made it out the other side. Why would this be? Is it normal? Everyone I've spoken to says theirs were uncomfortable, but more like a smear - not excrutiating. Any ideas? Thanks.

I had 3 internals and only 1 hurt and this was right at the end when they finally worked out that she wasn't positioned correctly.

Perhaps they hurt because she was back to back?

Maybe - but forgot to say that when another midwife took over, it was far less painful - even the one before they gave me the epidural!

Yeh my painful one was from a different midwife so maybe she was just rough. I know mine was rough as there was a little bit of a panic involved.

Some midwives and drs are just rough and some are gentle, although early VEs are a bit more uncomfortable as the cervix can be quite posterior (or right at the back of the vagina or round behind the head if the head is low down).
Also if you were induced the Prostin tablets sometimes make you very sensitive.

Of course you are 'normal', but normality is a broad spectrum, from some people hardly noticing a VE to others who will find it excruciating.

If its any consolation, it is usually less painful with the next baby!

my first ve was a real shock so painful I remember it even after 3 day labour and induction!

I'm interested in these replies as I was going to post about this very thing. I'm 36 weeks pregnant now and worrying about the internal exams part, because with my first labour, I found them ABSOLUTELY EXCRUCIATING . I wondered if this was normal. My labour wasn't back-to-back, I wasn't induced, needed nothing for the labour other than gas and air, and I've never had an 'issue' with internal exams before for smears etc. I was totally shocked with how painful all 6 or so of my exams. were. So, Minicooper, I sympathise!! I tell you, I'm asking for a whiff of gas and air this time round before they go anywhere near me!

ditto Mintpurple.

You can ask for a minimum of VEs next time.

At the maternity unit I went to last time (and am booked for again) they only did one examination and that was at my insistence when she thought I was ready to push and I suddenly got paranoid about a lip preventing the baby's exit. I think if you specify a preference to avoid VEs and are at a midwife-led unit you can probably skip them altogether provided all other signs are good.

in two labours i only had one exam (that was so they would admit me) def state a pref for no or very few, who needs more pain!

Thanks, ladies, sounds like I'm not the only one. It wouldn't put me off going through it all again ( thouth last 6 months of sleepless nights might!) but I did wonder if it was just me, or an unfortunately ham fisted midwife

I've had 2 like that,both from registrars Mini, and an in labour sweep - and from that I've deduced that both were sneaky,unconsented sweeps - They felt exactly the same as the sweep I knew about,but the midwife was more gentle(That's one thing I'd like to see my notes for actually)

I had a v painful VE when I was in hospital being induced with DS. I'd had 2 gel pessaries but not much was happening apart from irregular contractions. Midwife was having a rummage about to see if she could break my waters. Didn't realise it at the time, but she was doing a sweep and not just aimlessly rummaging about .
It was so painful I wanted to cry. I kept inching up the bed to get away from her. There was a woman in the bed opposite me, and she was waiting to have her waters broken, and I remember thinking to myself 'I mustn't cry or scream in case I terrify the woman opposite'.
Anyway, midwife managed to get her crochet hook thing in and broke my waters. The relief was unbelievable.