should I/could I do it again? (childbirth, I mean)

[dinny]

I've had two lovely children but of late have been thinking more would be great.

but, I am scared - of what I don't know as had two ok deliveries (albeit with 2nd - ds - getting stuck, but was ok)

I just feel am kind of asking too much after having two healthy babies - is that a usual feeling or my gut feeling saying - don't do it! - ???

I think it's the usually feeling because I've been having it myself lately.

That's pretty normal.

its up to you. obv

on one hand your fears.

on the other hand you like the ones you made already - chances are you'll like the next one.

can't remember if I felt like this after my first dd.....

just feel so darn scared - not sure why!

I felt like that during my second pregnancy, or course everything went smoothly. I do kinda feel like a third could be pushing my luck a little.

yeah, same, MKG

I wonder if it's because my immediate family all have two kids....

Yeah everyone I know has two and I they always say how two is soooo hard (I don't agree). Then I get scared and think could the third be my bad child. I've been blessed with two good sleeper and eaters with no allergies. Do I push my luck with a third who will probably push me to the edge.

a lot of my friends now have three and even four...

gosh, am very tempted!

I had similar feelings and worries. Then the matter was taken out of my hands

I was scared in my third pregnancy - of losing the baby, of not having the child I was expecting and planning on, of something happening to me. Not scared all the time you understand - but it definately crossed my mind a fair bit. I think part of my fear was the knowledge that my daughters are of an age where you would have to explain everything to them and they would feel the grief very much if anything had happened.

But it didn't - and for most people all will be well and as you expect. You can't let what is a basically irrational fear make such an important decision - and I would say 3 is a magic number!!

This thread has made me smile, as we were concerned that we were pushing our luck having our second and I had a dreadful pregnancy, traumatic delivery, lots of post-birth problems, and DD was a very demanding newborn and never slept!
I like our definition of "luck".

(Disclaimer - we had fertility treatment, and we have had several friends who had children with severe health problems, in fact a couple of friends' babies had problems so bad that they died , so we were right, we really were lucky)

agree with northernlurker - i was very much the same in my second pg. i think because i am a 'worrier' in general - with ds1 i was so anxious (will i have a terrible birth? will i hate being a mother? will i scar my poor child for life?) but i had a good birth with ds1 and he's turned into a lovely 3yo. so i didn't have the same anxieties with ds2 and i think i worried instead about something going wrong.

don't know if this makes sense!!

'what to expect' addresses this q by saying that the odds of having another healthy child are improved, not reduced, if you've already had one or more. i found this helpful... ?

yes, AG, snap - I am such a worrier as well!

ah dinny it takes one to know one... i think embracing your worrier-ness can help.. this is my latest idea - rather than trying endlessly (and unsuccessfully) to worry less, I'm trying to say to myself 'That's just because you're a worrier, it's not real, you just have to have something to worry about' when I get overtaken by irrational thoughts. Sometimes it helps...

asicsgirl - that's a great attitude, I think I might use that one myself.

yes, that is a great idea, AG!!

am going to try and employ that myself!!