Need a bit of a rant about sorting out my epi scar and my next birth - stupid system just isn't set up to help!

[MrsTittleMouse]

I've posted on here loads about my awful treatment by the OB when I gave birth and the huge epi scar that he gave me without my consent, how I was sewn up by the SHO and have healed really badly.

I'm now PG again, and I want to go back to the only gynae who was at all sympathetic or useful - partly because I want her opinion as to whether the scar will hold through another VB, partly because my issues still aren't sorted out from last time. But she isn't based in the hospital where I'm booked to deliver DB2. The gynae I saw in that hospital was awful. So when I asked the MW to please refer me back to the good consultant, she told me that she couldn't - as I wasn't officially in the system at that hospital. She advised me to get a referral from the GP.

So I got a referral from the GP, phoned the hospital, got an appointment, all great. Then they phoned me yesterday and told me that they had to cancel the appointment as I was pregnant. The receptionist told me that it was OK, as the gynae also had an OB clinic, so I could still see her. They were supposed to get back to me, but they haven't. I've left answerphone messages, but no joy. They told me that they were going to contact my CMW, and I think that's the problem. They won't see me, as I'm not going to give birth there. But she isn't the person I see for a delivery, she's the person I see to do the gynae stuff! But I am really worried that "computer says no". So my choice is to see the complete arse at the other hospital, or to transfer all my care to the hospital with the good gynae, and fuck up all my antenatal/ultrasound/physio appointments that are already made (the worst problem being that I have an anomoly ultrasound booked in a few weeks).

So I'm stuck in the middle of the system. I know that it's nobody's fault, and that everyone has to do what is set out on the computer system for bookings. I just need a rant, as I'm so worried about this delivery as it is, and I just wanted to see the only person who treated me well after my last delivery - so that I could get an opinion from someone I trust.

Do you know the gynaes name ? If you do, phone the hospital switchboard, and ask for Dr X's secretary. Explain the situation to her, and say that you are concerned that you are caught in a trap of having a gyn problem, but are pg.

Alternatively, if you can afford it, you could see her privately - as you just need an opinion it would prob be 150 quid or so.

Oh, thank you. I am in such a state about it, with the fear of the next birth and the pregnancy hormones that I just hadn't thought that there might be a way out. DH would be fine with us spending the money on a private consultation, as he's so worried about me.

OK, I just spoke to the MW who phoned me yesterday to cancel the appointment. And shockingly for the NHS, there actually is a good reason for them cancelling, even though it doesn't help me and I'm stuck in the middle. Because I'm 18 weeks pregnant, I look pregnant, and so they want to keep me away from the regular gynae patients. Which I can completely understand.

Thats understandable, but I'm sure that pg women get gyn problems anyway, so there must be a precedent. Did you mw have any other info to give you re the obs appointment.

Do you know the nearest private hospitals to you ? You can go on their website and see who consults there.

My CMW is going to refer me to the OB at the hospital where I will deliver (i.e. one of the doctors who could actually take over my care if things go pear-shaped during my MLU delivery). So she is organising that I will see a doctor anyway. Which seems to be all she can do unless I transfer all my care to the hospital where the nice gynae is (the MW at that hospital confirmed that - she said that I could keep the anomoly scan, but that everything else would switch). That isn't good as I'd either have to switch back, or deliver there - and it's further away which scares me for a second birth which could be really fast (I hope!).

I have been given the phone number of the nice gynae's secretary, so I can make a private appointment if I want. DH isn't answering his phone at work, which is annoying as I just want to sort this out! She is the top consultant at that hospital, so coupled with the sympathy, I'm guessing that she's the right person to see. I have been given the name of a consultant in London that another MNetter recommended for bad scarring which is another option. It would involve travelling, but to be honest this is so important that's irrelevant.