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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Elective c-section embarrassment

50 replies

Mum2025 · 25/09/2024 19:51

Hello , I’m expecting my first baby in February 2025 but I’m so insecure about my body . I’m chubby and I’m insecure how my lady parts look . I’m embarrassed about people looking at me in a vulnerable place . I want to know if they will block my view with a screen before they lift up my gown because I don’t want to see that . I’m also embarrassed for my husband to see everything in all its glory even tho he loves all of me I just get embarrassed easily and would rather none of us see me during the surgery . I feel like I can bare with the fact of me being half naked if I can’t see all the people in the room looking at me and pretend I don’t exist . And also will they cover me back up before I go to the resting area …. Please if anyone can read this and let me know .

OP posts:
BarbaraHoward · 25/09/2024 19:55

Neither of us saw anything of my body during my c sections. Flowers

Namechangencncnc · 25/09/2024 19:58

Neither of you will see anything, if that helps. Your husband will stay next to you and they put the screen up before they start.

Then they will cover you up when they transfer you from the table to the bed afterwards - you'll still be lying flat at this point, and your husband won't be there with you.

sugarplum33 · 25/09/2024 20:01

They really have seen it all before and hopefully once all the adrenaline and excitement hits it won't matter to you either.

I don't remember feeling exposed at any point. Obviously lots is going on below your waist but this will be covered by your gown then a screen. If you don't want your partner to look then speak to him about this. Once the op is finished you'll be covered up and kept warm in recovery. If you're feeling particularly anxious about it still on the day then speak to a member of the team and they should take extra care to keep you feeling comfortable. The teams who did both mine were amazing.

Newsenmum · 25/09/2024 20:02

Hi ok so no way will your husband be looking beyond the screen! I’ll tell you how it happens:
You take your clothes off (in privacy) and put on one of those hospital gowns. Then you go into theatre and meet the big team of people who explain it all. Have your magic injection and you lie down and they make sure it’s worked. Then they pull the screen down and unwrap your gown and put your catheter in when you can feel completely nothing. Yes it’s weird. But they’re focussing on cutting you open and chatting. They love getting the baby out. Just note they might shave you (if you haven’t been told to do so beforehand). Your and DH will have your heads at the same end and see nothing. Once the baby is out, they might until your front a bit to put the baby on your boob but they’ll cover your lower end up again before lowering the screen. Then you get pushed into another room with a baby on your chest. Bliss.

Newsenmum · 25/09/2024 20:02

Also put any preferences in your birth notes,

Echobelly · 25/09/2024 20:06

You won't see anything, they won't care at all what you look like they have seen every body there is, there is nothing wrong with your lady parts, labia are labia. You partner won't be staring at your lower body, he'll be standing by your shoulders IIRC (I had two sections)

HairyFeline · 25/09/2024 20:13

Just to add that I felt the same as you and the ward nurse let me remove my own catheter afterwards. She showed me how on a dummy one first and was happy to let me after she’d left - with strict instructions to holler for help if needed. It was easy.

Babyboomtastic · 25/09/2024 20:24

I've hated my body and it's squidyness for as long as I remember, all except for the last few months of pregnancy with both of mine. My soft tummy was firm, my thighs didn't look big any more because of bump. It took me by surprise, but it may be that by the time February gets here you'll feel more body confident than you do now.

I don't remember feeling particularly on display in any event.

Babyboomtastic · 25/09/2024 20:26

And being frank, the dr/nurse who may see your labia has probably just finished reconstructing someone else's. Your vulva will be a much happier vulva than many they'll be seeing! Not that it matters at all though!

shellyleppard · 25/09/2024 20:27

Op the screen is up so you won't be able to see anything. Just be prepared to possibly be shaved. Also don't wear nail varnish on your toes, they have to take it off 😭!!

Mostlyoblivious · 25/09/2024 20:30

shellyleppard · 25/09/2024 20:27

Op the screen is up so you won't be able to see anything. Just be prepared to possibly be shaved. Also don't wear nail varnish on your toes, they have to take it off 😭!!

Was it gel? I didn’t have to for mine - it wasn’t mentioned

sleepdeprivationismyname · 25/09/2024 20:34

You can't see a thing around the screen, just tell him to go where the doctors tell him and it will be totally fine. The doctors have seen the worst of the worst, they won't care about how you look, just that you are ok during the section and so is the baby. In better news you are having a c section which means your husband wont see the placenta come out naturally with a large thud. Totally disgusting, and a mental image that can't be taken back.

Mum2025 · 25/09/2024 20:34

HairyFeline · 25/09/2024 20:13

Just to add that I felt the same as you and the ward nurse let me remove my own catheter afterwards. She showed me how on a dummy one first and was happy to let me after she’d left - with strict instructions to holler for help if needed. It was easy.

Also when I'm nervous I sweat and worried if I sweat down there as well. TMI but it's another stupid worry I have as well

OP posts:
Pistachiochiochio · 25/09/2024 20:36

My DP saw my insides when he was coming back from the resuscitaire (the table where the midwife checks and dries the baby) but that was from the surgery site not from my vulva!

Pistachiochiochio · 25/09/2024 20:41

Mum2025 · 25/09/2024 20:34

Also when I'm nervous I sweat and worried if I sweat down there as well. TMI but it's another stupid worry I have as well

They have seen all sorts and honestly wouldn't care a bit if you sweated buckets

JumperStripes · 25/09/2024 20:43

Just say you want the screen up and for it to stay up throughout which means you will both be cut off from seeing anything (as long as your DH remains seated) from your neck downwards. However, your body will be covered in sheets and you can’t see any of your body so sometimes it’s lovely to be able to watch it and video it if the consultant agrees.

birdglasspen2 · 25/09/2024 20:44

You can make a note on your birth plan explaining that neither of you want to see anything. You don’t have to go into reasons. Just point it out beforehand in case they don’t read closely. My DH never wanted to see anything or be asked to cut cord so they respected that. They put a sort of curtain across. If it helps I found that I really didn’t care who saw what around my 3 babies, you may find you don’t think about it half as much as you are leading up to it.

Haroldwilson · 25/09/2024 20:45

Your body is doing an amazing thing. Be proud of it. Don't waste time being ashamed of it being soft, sweaty, hairy - that's your natural state.

In twenty years' time you'll look back to yourself and think you were beautiful and glowing with health, you might as well think it now.

No one is comparing you to anything, your husband got you pregnant so presumably doesn't find you offensive.

To the doctors you're the latest in a long line of pregnant women, of all shapes and sizes. They're just concerned with getting your baby out, it's not speed dating!

Develop more body acceptance. You're about to have a little person who will learn a lot from how you show confidence or shame about your body.

Female bodies are naturally soft, whether you're size 6 or 26. It's not a bad thing.

Haroldwilson · 25/09/2024 20:45

Ps watch out for the surgery light - you can catch a glance on a reflection in it, which can be gory!

Haroldwilson · 25/09/2024 20:47

Pps thinking of it, I'm pretty sure I pooped during my c section (long labour, epidural, urge to push even though baby not engaged - your body pushes out whatever it can)

I don't even know if I pooped in front of the staff, I think someone swiped away something but who knows. The point is, they see it all and it's all fine.

Dyra · 25/09/2024 20:50

Hey OP, I work in obstetric theatres scrub side, and we really have seen it all. But we always try to preserve privacy and decency where possible, and any time you are exposed will be for a good reason, and we try to mitigate it as best we can.

So since you mention your lady parts, I'll list the times they will be exposed.

When you enter theatre, and before the spinal is inserted we'd ask you to remove your pants if you're wearing your own. If you're wearing net knickers or disposable pants, then we can remove them (i.e. cut them off) just before the catheter is inserted.

The first time will be when the catheter is inserted. We do this to every patient having a C-section. We can hold your gown up so you and your husband can't see what's going on, but obviously the nurse/ODP/midwife inserting the catheter has to be able to see what they are doing. Once it's inserted you'll be covered back up asap.

The catheter is necessary as it keeps your bladder drained, and thus as small as can be so is safely out of the way of the uterus reducing the chance of accidental bladder damage. It also gives us a way to see if there is any blood in your urine, which is an indication of damage. It's also the way we can test with dye to be sure there's no damage done, so it is vital.

The next time is cleaning. Unfortunately there's not much we can do here to mitigate this, as we need to area to be sterile, which means we cannot touch or cover it. Best we can do is to lift your gown again, so that you can't see, but at this point the entire team will be in theatre getting ready. It takes a minute or two total to apply the solution ensuring it covers everywhere (bump, lady parts, top part of your legs), and then for it to dry. Once it's dried, the drape goes on , and you're completely covered then.

Final time is post procedure. The lower portion of the drape is removed, with the upper portion left in situ so you can't see. You're frog legged (as when the catheter is inserted) and the surgeon removes any clots in your vagina, and checks there's no ongoing bleeding. Once that's done, a pad is put in place, your legs straightened back out, gown pulled down and/or you're covered with a sheet.

That it for theatre. In recovery, the nurse would like to check your pad every so often for bleeding. But this takes a couple of seconds, you'll still be covered by blankets, and the privacy curtains drawn.

Hope it helps, but for now, talk with your midwife about what will happen as well.

oustedbymymate · 25/09/2024 20:51

Firstly. Please try and not worry. They really won't care.

Secondly. There's a screen at chest height. You won't see anything

Dyra · 25/09/2024 20:52

shellyleppard · 25/09/2024 20:27

Op the screen is up so you won't be able to see anything. Just be prepared to possibly be shaved. Also don't wear nail varnish on your toes, they have to take it off 😭!!

That's absolutely not a thing at my trust. If anything, we'll comment how nice they are!

Tarantella6 · 25/09/2024 20:54

For dd2 they asked if I wanted to see her being pulled out. I said no, I don't want to see my insides and the doctor pointed out my huge bump was in the way so even without a screen you can't see anything except your own stomach, stretched to maximum pregnancy size😂

tiredwoman123 · 25/09/2024 20:55

We do 6 elective sections a day, 5 days a week on my unit. On top of that we have all the emergencies.

Imagine being a member of staff within that team of people.

We aren't like normal people. We see these things all day every day. Kindly, there's nothing special about your vagina or your sweat. It's all the same, and we see it all day. It's simply not a thing for us, we don't bat an eyelid.

Everyone sweats and bleeds and pops and vomits!

I appreciate for you it's a big event, but it isn't for us.