Due in 2 weeks, feeling overwhelmed!

[redclover79]

this is my 3rd pg, and I don't feel at all prepared for labour and birth! I had ds2 just under a year ago and had a really quick and 'easy' labour, no drugs no intervention etc... This time round, I've been worrying for the last few weeks as the baby's been transverse and shown no signs of moving round. Had a hospital appointment on Weds and had a scan which showed the baby had turned and everything was looking good. So I should be really happy and positive now but I'm not.
My mum is miles away caring for my terminally ill aunt and is there for the foreseeable future. I keep having to cancel going to visit my aunt due to various bugs etc, so I feel like I'm letting the family down. Mum has arranged for me to go down and visit with my brother this weekend (without checking!), but I will be 38+5 and I've had a couple of shows etc, so I don't really want to go anywhere as my last labour was only about 2 hours. However, my aunt is deteriorating rapidly so I feel it's a now or never situation...
And when I do go into labour I've no idea what to do about my kids. MIL will not drive the 20 mins down the road to get here without FIL, FIL is happy to drop everything and help out but will not do it unless MIL gives permission. I didn't think to ask other parents at school before hols as I thought my mum would be here, I have one friend with no kids who will help out but she's just split with her boyfriend and is getting trashed a lot, and my brother's a pothead...
I know once I get the other side of the birth everything will be fine, but I'm totally dreading waking up to find my waters have broken or I'm having contractions to the point where I'm barely sleeping...
This is probably not the right place to post, sorry! Would be grateful if anyone has any advice to help me get this in perspective!
thanks

You are being completely rational and normal. The prospect of giving birth is usually much worse than the reality and perhaps you are just getting your head together before you are ready to have this baby. It doesn't mean things are going to go awry.

Also don't worry about your family, your priority quite rightly is this baby and it sounds like you are getting yourself ready mentally and physically.

I bet your baby is here by Sunday though

agree with who, you are being completely normal.
You should be under no pressure from your family so close to your due date.

Hope all goes well

thanks who and pedilia - I keep wondering if I'm even approaching rational... I've been stressing about having a c-section if the baby didn't turn, now she has I'm worrying about her turning back and me not noticing!
I'm also worried because my mum is one of 3 sisters and the other sister died of cancer a few years ago... My grandparents are both still alive so I feel I should be making more of an effort in the circumstances, but I don't want to go into labour on the M25 and having no idea where the local hospitals are etc!
I also get the distinct impression that MIL is being evasive just because she can, I know I'm being unrealistic in thinking that for once she could make the effort and be supportive but she's a typical MIL and has resentment issues with me!

bump

slept better last night but woke up to a phone call from my brother this morning saying he couldn't visit this weekend as he's got to fix his mate's car!!? Feel like I'm being forced into going to see my aunt, dp is not happy about situation either but...

You need to concentrate on you and your new baby and not worry about everybody else - I am sure your aunt would understand that you are in no condition to visit at the moment and would not want you to be getting stressed about going to see her. Can you call her and talk properly on the phone? I am sure she would much rather see you with the new baby too? Tell your mum you just cannot do the trip as you are having shows and feel that you are too close to delivery.

As for MIL - where is DH in all this - can he not get his mother in line? Maybe she is just waiting to be "needed" so she can do the dramatic " we had to drop everything and race over to look after the children" thing? Is that what she is like?

hi sam- my mum's always like this and organising my life for me, usually I tell her where to stick it but... well the problem is my best friend died of cancer a few years ago and I feel like I didn't make enough effort to see her as life kept getting in the way... I know logically that I should stay home for the next few weeks til I have the baby but with my overemotional pregnancy brain I'm not being rational at all!!
As for MIL, she has that trait where she needs to be centre of everything and we're all supposed to come running. I can usually deal with her because I know how difficult she can be I just never bother asking for anything! She loves letting us down at the last minute with babysitting and I just don't trust her not to see this as the ultimate opportunity to get one over on me!

redclover, don't think I can offer much constructive advice but wanted to post to give you some support. You're def right not to do any long journeys if you had a short labour last time. I wouldn't worry about MIL too much, she probably cares deep down but has a funny way of showing it, my Mum sounds just like your MIL and I try to do similar and not rely on her for anything.

Can your DH talk to his Dad about the situation and get your FIL to agree to be on standby? Might not be too popular with MIL but at least then you've got someone and prob would all be forgotten once baby arrives. My brother sounds just the same as yours, trouble is they don't realise what it means to you and don't think there is anything wrong with not turning up.

thanks lennied - just cancelled going to see my aunt tomorrow, although I've only managed to persuade myself as I've been having twinges on and off all day .
FIL has been brilliant and has even installed a phone next to his bed so we can call him day or night!
I think the only thing left to worry about is the birth now!

twinges sound good . Glad you are all sorted, enjoy a nice relaxing w/e... and a new baby!