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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

How much did your contractions hurt?

65 replies

fitforflight · 19/11/2023 14:09

With my first I was booked for a C-section but ended up going into labour before that date, so the result was an emergency section. I only got to 2cm dilated before the section and although I was having contractions (according to the monitor) I could barely feel them. My friend was in agony from 2cm all the way to the end.

Did you find there was a point where they became very painful? I appreciate it's different for everyone! Did you find the same sort of pain levels at those points with subsequent babies?

I'm hoping to have a vaginal birth this time and although I'm confident in myself after birth when looking after a baby I feel like a first time parent when thinking about labour as it's not something I've experienced.

OP posts:

luckbealadytonight · 19/11/2023 17:06

I do think it's different for everyone but mine only started really hurting within 3 hours of birth with dc1 and literally 40 mins before birth for dc2. I labour very quickly though.

Miri42 · 19/11/2023 17:07

Just towards the end

Roselilly36 · 19/11/2023 17:23

When I was in really active labour, I couldn’t even say my name, absolutely overwhelming feeling. But my body just took over, the feeling of wanting to push is an absolute desire. I can remember when giving birth to DS2, why I am doing this again! I must be bonkers 😂 I did have natural labour with both though, no pain relief or gas and air. Not how I planned it, tbh, I was open to anything that could help me, but it was just how it happened. Good luck OP the birth doesn’t matter as long as you and baby are safe.

Original poster

fitforflight · 19/11/2023 18:04

Thanks all. What's considered actual active labour?

OP posts:

Rocket1982 · 19/11/2023 18:06

my contractions weirdly stopped hurting completely with DC1 once I got to the pushing stage and I felt only pressure. Before that they were very painful! Was hoping the same would happen with DC2 but it didn't! Maybe DC1 cut off the blood supply to my pain nerves...

Rocket1982 · 19/11/2023 18:07

I think active labour is from 5cm?

Teatrayderby · 19/11/2023 18:09

I was on the drip. They were off the top of that toca chart thing every 20 seconds but it was exhaustion rather than pain really after hours and hours of it with no progress cm wise I was drained.

DelightfulDoris · 19/11/2023 18:12

I have had 3 DC and 2 labours similar. The first was induced and it was incredibly painful. Had a spinal with that one.

Other 2… it’s hard to remember exactly! Definitely gets to a point of being so painful you can’t talk, then eventually (mine were long 12/13hr proper labours) I can’t remember the name!! But you feel that you can’t take it anymore and you want to give in blah blah.. then shortly after that the huge pressure then urge to push. Which I can’t ever not push!!

delilabell · 19/11/2023 18:12

I genuinely thought I was going to die. I was induced and on the drip. They started being hideous 6 hours before I gave birth

DelightfulDoris · 19/11/2023 18:13

To add, I think combined with the extreme tiredness it makes it really hard work x

Cocteautriplet · 19/11/2023 18:28

I had a similar experience to you in that I had an emergency c-section first time round (failure to progress) then a vbac with my subsequent two births. The first c- section birth was grim as I was induced and laboured away painfully but with no benefit for the best part of 24hours … got to 3cms and they called it as I was really in a bad way by then. My vbacs were not painless but definitely doable … the worst bit for both vbacs was the pushing at the end … but that’s just awful for a few minutes as they crown.

My conclusions based on my personal experiences are:

natural labour is way easier than induced labour as you get all these amazing natural painkillers (and I like gas and air ) I’d tried an epidural the first time and it didn’t work for me at all… the absolute killer the first time is fear which shuts everything down and is so unfair … I really feel for first time mums

even if you’ve only progressed a little bit before in previous labour it will make a difference to the speed and ease of your progression next time … I was 6cm the second time before I even thought to go into hospital but in hindsight id been labouring all day but it was mostly just these wierd painless clicky feelings down below.

I had a doula the second time as the first experience was so horrible and it made the world of difference to my anxiety.

mizu · 19/11/2023 18:31

@delilabell yes! Me too. I was induced for both of mine as they both didn't want to come out!

Remember when having my 1st having an almighty contraction that went up and up and up and then when it subsided, I said something like good lord, I felt like I was going to die then!

The midwife just turned round and said well love it's going to get a whole lot worse than that!

2nd not so bad, half the time in labour and I knew what to expect I guess.

wishuponastar1988 · 19/11/2023 18:34

I think it varies from person to person. My waters went at 10am and I stayed home until around 7pm and when I got to the hospital I was 7cm (I was in agony by this point). Earlier in the day, I was having contractions that were like period pains, took the dog for a walk and went to Tesco and it was manageable. For me, the contractions were far worse than the actual pushing!

Lookingfornewdirection · 19/11/2023 18:35

not really. To me it was intense pressure rather than pain.

luckbealadytonight · 19/11/2023 20:51

I would say active labour is when you can no longer speak through your contractions and the world starts to fade away.

NatMoz · 19/11/2023 20:55

I didn't make it to 5cm barely before emergency c section but I didn't think i could go on at that point.

I was totally screaming my head off. Maybe I'm weak, no idea how people handle it all the way to 10cm

Givemepickles · 19/11/2023 21:10

It was a pain like I couldn't have imagined. Total torture. I was not induced and didn't have an easy time, thanks PP 🙄no fucking happy hormones here. From my first contraction I was 3 in 10 and yet my labour lasted 30 hours. Once I got the epidural at 8cm I told my DH if it didn't work or they took it away I needed him to kill me and I meant it.

I'm requesting an elective this time. I'll never trust the NHS with caring for me in labour again.

NotToYou · 19/11/2023 21:15

Mine were both back to back. It was hideously, unbearably painful from pretty early on.

Glitterb · 19/11/2023 21:16

I had no pain really at all until my waters went at 6cm, it was manageable until about an hour before birth when it was agony! I begged for an epidural which failed and then 20 mins later she was born! My labour was incredibly quick, I was only in the delivery room 4 hours before she was born.

@Givemepickles you poor thing, honestly that sounds utterly miserable!

bjjgirl · 19/11/2023 21:18

I have very fast labours and I literally thought I was dying

EricInk · 19/11/2023 21:21

I thought contractions were really painful, like unimaginable levels of pain and I was scared of each one coming back. I thought I had a high pain tolerance going into it and didn't give it much thought until it happened. Second time around I was more prepared so found it easier. I have really long labours where my babies don't want to come out though! It's tolerable if it doesn't go on for hour and hours, DC1 took days....

ShowOfHands · 19/11/2023 21:22

First labour was 31hrs and I wanted to die. It was pain like I've never experienced. I have a really high pain threshold but the contractions were 2 minutes long, 30 seconds gap and agony from start to finish. DD was in a v bad position though and I had a catalogue of interventions after hours of pushing and eventually, an emcs. I couldn't think or talk.

Second was 38hrs and didn't hurt a bit!

No drugs at all until I had the emcs, both times.

Isthisexpected · 19/11/2023 21:26

the birth doesn’t matter as long as you and baby are safe.

^ literally hundreds of studies disprove this. The experience of birth goes on to predict postnatal mental health for a start.

It's so unpredictable and personal OP. You can do it! I declined internal examinations with mine so can't tell you cm but it became very painful in the final hour each time. Couldn't really speak!

vipersnest1 · 19/11/2023 21:28

Interesting, looking back!
With both labours, my body didn't 'do' the gradual increase in frequency - started at three minute intervals both times.
First DC was a back to back labour, failure to progress, drip, you name it (all but the stuff I should have had o pop f course). By 24 hours in, I was pretty much delirious but it still hurt like hell. I used gas and air, and also had meptid which was useless. It ended up being 36hrs plus (to this day I'm not sure and I don't want to remind myself). The last two and a half hours were spent with the midwives forcing me to crouch for contractions until DC was finally born.
Second labour same start, and we had to wait for in-laws to come to look after DC1. By then, I couldn't speak during a contraction as I was busy dealing with it, but not agony. I was 7cm when I got to hospital and said I'd like an epidural (as I should have had for DC1), but was told it was too late. Having said meptid wasn't helpful, I was given pethidine which did make a difference. DC was born 1hr 40mins later.

CrikeyMajikey · 19/11/2023 21:54

Mine didn’t hurt anywhere near as much as the pain of my retained placenta straight afterwards. I’d had gas and air for the births; it was painful but more exhausting than unbearable pain, I slept for a few seconds between each contraction. With DC1 the feeling of needing to push felt a bit like and orgasm, it was such an involuntary reaction from my body. Weird

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