did anyone have a toddler with them at a homebirth?

[workstostaysane]

if so, what did you do with them?
were they ok? did they get bored and want to go to the park instead?
am thinking i may have to have my mother around to keep her occupied when need be, but that could well be more trouble than just having to deal with the 2 yr old..IYSWIM

be interested to hear anyone's stories.

Ds1 was nearly 2 when ds2 was born. My mum and dad live very close, and the plan was that depending on time of day, we would ring them when ds2 was on his way.

As it turned out, I laboured through the night (lucky that ds1 is good sleeper) and gave birth downstairs at 6am. Ds1 woke up at 7am (heard him running across the landing)

We introduced him to his little brother, had cuddles etc, then about 8ish my mum and dad took him out for a few hours, and brought him back in the afternoon.

hth

Hi workstostaysane,
I have had three homebirths and obviously 2 of them were with toddlers in the house. In the early stages of labour I didn't need to do anything special with them. Every now and then I needed to get up and wiggle my hips and I just told them that I had a sore tummy because the baby might be born soon. When it got slightly worse I remember taking DS1 in the bath with me, great pain relief and he was happy playing. When I really couldn't play with them anymore the telly went on. And by the time you would call a midwife (and she stays) then it might be time to have some kind of minder for your toddler. I was lucky DS2 was born at 20.15h, about an hour after DS1 went to bed, and he never woke during my labouring. DS3 was born at 5.30am with first signs of labour beginning after DS1 and DS2 went to bed. Again they didn't wake up.

You could have a plan like, if labour starts in the day, send them away to play at a friend's house, if it starts later in the day/evening, have somebody in your house whose sole job is to look after him ie dinner and bedtime. This could be your husband (like when my DS2 was born), but it could be a good friend or your mother/sister.

Hth

Hi workstostaysane,
I have had three homebirths and obviously 2 of them were with toddlers in the house. In the early stages of labour I didn't need to do anything special with them. Every now and then I needed to get up and wiggle my hips and I just told them that I had a sore tummy because the baby might be born soon. When it got slightly worse I remember taking DS1 in the bath with me, great pain relief and he was happy playing. When I really couldn't play with them anymore the telly went on. And by the time you would call a midwife (and she stays) then it might be time to have some kind of minder for your toddler. I was lucky DS2 was born at 20.15h, about an hour after DS1 went to bed, and he never woke during my labouring. DS3 was born at 5.30am with first signs of labour beginning after DS1 and DS2 went to bed. Again they didn't wake up.

You could have a plan like, if labour starts in the day, send them away to play at a friend's house, if it starts later in the day/evening, have somebody in your house whose sole job is to look after him ie dinner and bedtime. This could be your husband (like when my DS2 was born), but it could be a good friend or your mother/sister.

Hth

I have had 1 hb with a toddler in the house, laboured at night, similar to runnyhabbit, with dd waking up to new sis. According to mw, loads of 2nd labours are at night when the mother is relaxed because they know dc1 is sorted for the night. Am currently pg, and have given present babe in womb strict orders not to come in daytime!

I have had 2 home births, with toddlers/pre-schoolers in the house, and both have been daytme labours.

For the first (2nd child) ds was 21 mths, so was woken at his normal time, had breakfast in front of the TV, big treat, but the pool was set up in dining room by then. Then the dh took him off to a friends, who returned him a couple of hours after the event.

For the second HB, ds now almost 4, dd just 2. Both were told that they were going to meet 'our baby' soon, as my labour started midday, and although ds kinda understood, he was more excited about going to visit the friends who were having the both of them. they just carried on doing their thing mostly in the garden, as last week wasn't too cold, and watched the pool go up with interest, then off they went when the mw turned up, both more excited by the promise of a bath fizzer that night. Dh collected them at 9.30 that night, dd went straight to bed, ds met our baby, had his bath and also went to bed, with no probs.

I recommend having several friends who dc could be sent to locally if poss, you are able to relax and get on with it if you know they are safe and well attended to. HTH and good luck

what great stories. thanks so much. i forgot that the baby might come when dd is asleep! she sleeps for 12 hours so there is a 50/50 chance that will happen i guess.
i think i'll just have to decide who to have with us who can occupy her when needed. we are going to have a pool as well and i think she'll enjoy that.

thanks again for these stories. they help a great deal

hi I had ds2 when ds1 was 2y3m. I also went into labour in the nighttime, but called dp's sister early in the morning to look after ds1. She came about 6 am and took ds1 off for breakfast, returning about 8.30 with some lovely flowers. I had planned to have my mum in the house but she had gone home for the weekend thinking I was nowhere near going into labour lol. So it definitely would help to have a few people on your list, but you can reassure them it won't be for long.

I am currently expecting ds3 and this reminds me I haven't even thought about what to do with the boys when I am in labour. This time I'll be hoping it all happens when they are at school .

DD1 was 18mo when DD2 born, Labour started at 1.30pm, DD2 born at 4pm DD1 slept through the whole thing got up at 7am to find a new sister.

Am worried this time though DD1 will be 4, DD2 2 1/2 don't think I can be that lucky this time, will have to suss out some friends to come and look after DDs, also I don't have niggles or anything it's 0-60 in minutes and I'm not quiet. I am worried about going into labour during the day the DDs seeing me screaming and DP not being there.