Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Preparing for giving birth without medical assistance

119 replies

Maevish · 01/07/2023 11:09

I'm due in three weeks. Because of where I live there is a reasonable chance I'll end up giving birth on the way to hospital, which is 2.5 hours away. There are lots of mobile phone black spots on the way so we may not be able to get medical advice via phone either.

I'm packing hospital bag and have included lots of towels, clips and badass scissors for cord.

We will also Google shoulder dystocia and positions that can help.
What else should we take/learn about?

It's my second baby, no complications, and me and my husband are competent and not panickers. My midwife won't really say much about which possible complications we could prepare for. I know it's likely to be fine, but I'd prefer to be prepared and not need it than to be unlucky and wish I'd prepared. If we are literally all on our own and there's a problem, I want to at least try to save the baby (or me!) even though we might not do it right.

BTW there are no other options here, like I can't have a home birth or anything.

OP posts:
CorBlimeyGovnr · 01/07/2023 11:11

Where do you live that your nearest hospital is so far away? In your shoes I’d be trying to stay closer for a few weeks

HowcanIhelp123 · 01/07/2023 11:14

Have you thought about staying in a hotel or with family/friends nearer the hospital or asking to be induced at the hospital to make sure you have medical care? Even if you had a family member that was only an hour away from the hospital that makes a big difference.

Crumbcatcher · 01/07/2023 11:14

Go and stay closer to medical assistance. I wouldn't be comfortable with your situation, especially as you're already a parent.

eetee · 01/07/2023 11:15

Has your midwife not offered any advice here?

eetee · 01/07/2023 11:15

Sorry I meant specifically about the practical aspect not giving birth unassisted

Original poster
Maevish · 01/07/2023 11:15

Scottish Highlands.
Moving to Inverness for a month isn't really an option. Cost issues, plus I have a toddler, husband has a job, etc.

OP posts:
Original poster
Maevish · 01/07/2023 11:17

Induction is an option, but I really really don't want one. Even if I did arrange one, the baby could come before that so I still need to be prepared.

OP posts:
Original poster
Maevish · 01/07/2023 11:18

I should add that lots of women here do this - it's not at all unusual in this area!

OP posts:
ClarityClankrant · 01/07/2023 11:18

How do people generally manage up their regarding births? Do most have home births?

WeWereInParis · 01/07/2023 11:19

Would it be better to plan for a home birth? Giving birth at home would be better than on the road in a mobile phone black spot surely?

helpfulperson · 01/07/2023 11:20

I thought most women moved closer to Inverness for the month beforehand.

TomatoSandwiches · 01/07/2023 11:20

Do you not know any otlf the local women well enough to see how they prepared, they may have much better advice and also be willing to help or be on hand in the event of.

Mrsjayy · 01/07/2023 11:23

Would the midwife not come to you. What do other women do it does sound like you ate preparing for a free birth tbh the midwives will be used to mothers being remote.

Mrsjayy · 01/07/2023 11:23

Are*

MichelleScarn · 01/07/2023 11:24

Maternity care in Highlands and Grampian is dire, the time that midwife unit at Dr Gray's was closed was appalling. And don't get me started on the roads to get you there!

MichelleScarn · 01/07/2023 11:24

Not v helpful sorry!

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 01/07/2023 11:26

I guess I'd be looking uo about delayed cord clamping. Wait for the cord to stop pulsing etc think it's usually a few mins. That way the baby keeps more blood.

ChocBananaSmoothie · 01/07/2023 11:29

Read up on how to deal with postpartum hemorrhage. Because of my experience with that I'd be looking to head for the hospital as soon as you have any hint that labour might be starting.

dadoodoodoo · 01/07/2023 11:34

I certainly don’t want to appear to be supporting free birthing ( I don’t) but if you really can’t stay closer there are a number of courses online regarding basic safety for free birthing which may be useful.

Caspianberg · 01/07/2023 11:35

I would be moving closer for a month.
You say it’s common, but it actually isn’t. Most areas which far away hospitals either fly to nearer city or drive and relocate 2-4 weeks before due date.

A friend in Alaska who was pregnant with multiples, had to relocate from 20weeks! Until birth around 34 weeks, then stay another 3 months until babies strong enough to fly home.

LadyofLansallos · 01/07/2023 11:37

There are several American resources for unassisted childbirth/free birthing which might be worth looking it.

MrsHsGirl · 01/07/2023 11:37

What's the reason that a home birth isn't an option? My mum lived on the highlands for many years and supported a number of local women in labour for various reasons (she wasn't a midwife)

MrsHsGirl · 01/07/2023 11:38

Also for the bag - bottled water, sterilising wipes?

Twattle · 01/07/2023 11:38

What did you do for the 1st birth?

pinguins · 01/07/2023 11:39

I lived in a similarly remote area in Ireland and for women who lived this far away from the (very small regional) hospital, they either induced them or scheduled c sections and let them stay in hospital around their due date. Is none of this an option? It sounds like the maternity services should be managing this sort of thing for your safety!