Too stressed to go into labour?

[UnicornRainbowSky]

Hi everyone,

I'm currently 40+1 with my second baby. My first came at 41+3 and weighed 7lbs7 so not massive. I've been mentally preparing myself for going overdue again but this time round I've been having strong period pains, loose stools etc for about two weeks already. Baby is very low and engaged. The midwife on Friday said "oh, I'll probably see you this weekend!"

I perfectly well know that due dates are to be taken with a massive pinch of salt. But I do worry that a certain amount of stress I'm under is preventing me from going into labour.

I've been suffering from excruciatingly painful sciatica for almost two weeks. It's only slowly getting better now after going to the osteopath a few times.
Because of that I can barely look after our daughter so my husband has had to take lots of time off work (he's self-employed), which I'm so grateful for but I know it's very stressful for him so it makes me more stressed as well.

We also have no family close by, everyone is busy with their own summer plans, weddings coming up etc. So I also feel a bit isolated, especially as I can't even go for a walk or anything like that due to my back pain.

I just feel like I'll never be in the right mindset to go into labour and soon the medical pros will start talking to me about induction, which I really really don't want. So it's stressing me even more. Argh!

Not sure what advice I'm looking for, just some encouragement maybe?

Thanks for reading if your got this far x

Hope you have a wonderful birth when it gets here. You and your body will just know what to do when it does happen, and drugs can help with the sciatica and the stress.

Enjoy it as best you can, and remember your husband is a dad as well. It’s not a favour to you, he is 50% responsible for your kids, so it’s great that he sounds super supportive, but it’s for his benefit as well. Don’t feel guilty about any of it, you’ll be great!

Ah OP you poor thing, this is something that I have wondered about on my second pregnancy too - definitely fewer naps and poor sleep this time around, fewer massages, no yoga classes...
I'm a big believer in the mind body connection, so I get where you're coming from. And of course when you fret about a possible induction, your stress levels rise, and you feel guilty about the stress, then you worry about the effects of the stress... been there and it's a horrible vicious cycle.
Try to internalise what that midwife said, they have seen it all. Is there a mental health nurse you could speak to on your team? Is there the option of a membrane sweep?
I hope it goes really well for you xx

Oh you poor thing, sounds tough.

As hard as it is, try to relax when you can. The baby will come when it is ready. Get as much rest as you can and don't feel guilty about it.

Any friends or neighbours that can help with DD? Could she go on a playdate for 2 hours so you can nap and have a bath (dont know how sciatica is about such things)? Small breaks can be very valuable.

Hope you had a good weekend OP. Your body is designed for pregnancy and birth, hopefully it'll happen soon x

Sounds stressful OP. I'm currently overdue (41 weeks tomorrow) and find the induction pressure similarly stressful.

Am trying to remember that babies are born in war torn countries and that at the end of the day, baby will come when they are ready - even if we're stressed or not.

Sending my best to you xxx

How are you getting on, OP?

Have a large glass of wine! Honestly... 🥰

I was told by my midwife that I was too stressed to go into labour at 2.30pm. I went home, collected my two children from school and had dinner and put them to bed. At 10.30 my waters broke and baby no 3 was born less than 2 hours later.

They will arrive when they decide to!

Should have added at 39 weeks exactly.

Ugh I feel so sorry for you the last week or so is the absolutely worst!! I’d be half tempted to get induced and get it over with tbh.

I wouldn’t worry about stress, your body will know when the time is right!

Hi OP, I felt the same with DS2. I was convinced I was too stressed to go into labour and the more I thought about it of course the more stressed I got. My waters broke and naturally at 40+5 so it definitely didn’t prevent me from going into labour (DS1 arrived at 38+1 so I do wonder if stressing caused the delay but I will never know).

I really do sympathise for you. I genuinely felt like I would be pregnant for ever. I was so tired, physically uncomfortable and mentally drained. I think I was actually a bit depressed. It all lifted when DS was born, he’s now six weeks old, and all the stress and discomfort is a distant memory.

Good luck for your impending labour and delivery, it will happen before you know it.