Vaginal birth after a 3rd degree tear

[MoreCheesecakeNow]

I had a 3rd degree tear after having DS almost 2 years ago and I'm undecided between attempting another vaginal delivery or having an elective c section.
I'm not pregnant and won't be for quite a while but I guess I'm looking for reassurance.

Hello, I had a 3rd degree tear with my first (and episiotomy and forceps). I was very worried about tearing again when pregnant with my second child. The consultant told me I was unlikely to tear as badly the second time around (she told me the statistics but I can't remember them....!), and encouraged me to have another vaginal birth. Overall I felt another vaginal birth was the right choice for me (they said with a previous 3rd degree tear I could have an elective csection if I wanted). The second time I had a 1st degree tear and then in my third birth I had a 2nd degree tear.

I hope this is reassuring! But also it is only anecdotal.

I'm 6 weeks postpartum and I had sex last night. I got a second degree tear and Labia abrasion which required stitches, I was fine durinf sex apart from at the end when I had to say stop as it felt like I split open. Today it's stinging to wee and I'm so worried I've re opened is this possible lol . Looking with a mirror it looks pretty open down there but idk if that's the joys of my new vagina since having a baby

It's really unlikely you've done any damage. Is it bleeding? If not just keep an eye on it. Lots of lube when you feel ready for sex.

I just had an elective c section after a 3rd degree tear with my first. It’s such a tough decision to make - I regularly wished there was a reason for it to be out of my hands, like a breach birth.

Im still not sure I made the right decision but what I would say is that it being planned meant that there wasn’t unpredictable trauma (my whole first labour was traumatic) and I am absolutely still continent, no piles and it felt safe and supportive.

The downside was that I did find the surgery quite an ordeal and the recovery is much harder than I was led to believe. I have found the pain much worse and longer lasting than the 3rd degree tear and this is quite debilitating.

Im not sure if this is helpful - I generally found everyone I spoke to was massively pro planned c sections and underplayed how tough it is (or was for me).