Any midwives on here? What do you want to see on a birth plan?

[EspeciallyEager]

My community midwife was quite dismissive about them so I am assuming they usually aren’t useful 😂

Thinking about the first birth plan I wrote (I went straight to an emergency c-sec so it was irrelevant) I doubt it would have been useful.

I can’t really give guidance on preferred pain relief because I’ve never been in serious pain before.

Saying things like “I’d like a water birth/ I’d like to keep upright and mobile” are lovely but depend on the circumstances of labour, so feel like they are better discussed at the time.

I wondered if it’s more helpful (given you will have never met me) to say things like:

• when I’m in pain I cope best with lots of distraction/quiet and privacy

• I found X traumatic in my last delivery

— I like a lot of detail when I have to make decisions about my care

That sort of thing?

What sort of things actually help you help us?

My birth plan was really for my partner to help him hold the line. I had a homebirth though so I knew I was safe from a lot of the things I didn't want.

I don't think the midwives looked at mine or even the one I did with them at my 36 week appointment.

The main things midwives needed to know for me was basically don't talk to me, touch me and no vaginal exams.

I'm sure my husband conveyed it much nicer than that but that was the bottom line!

In a hospital situation I suppose it might be useful to say please don't offer me a,b,c if there's anything you know you absolutely don't want?

Oooh, yes, I like what you have put. That kind of thing is super useful. I'm also a community midwife, was a LW midwife for years too. I don't encourage birth plans that are intended to be given to the midwives. As a midwife the first thing I (and all the other midwives I've ever worked alongside) do is discuss a womans preferences and wishes. Being on paper is pointless for me (but may be helpful for you and your partner) as I still want to discuss it for informed consent purposes. I will always read one though, so I generally say if it is helpful for you to do one, go ahead.

Do you want vaginal exams?
who is cutting the cord?
baby straight to you or cleaned and wrapped first?
Do you want the injection to deliver the placenta or let nature take its course?
will baby have vitamin k?

these are important hinge but you can put anything in them. I’d never dismiss you but sometimes have to prewarn women that things don’t always go to plan

Pretty much everything that a birth plan was meant to cover I was very much either "we'll see at the time" or "whatever you recommend, you're the professional".

So it felt a bit pointless. It was very much about the fact I quite fancied trying getting in the water but I wasn't bothered if the pool wasn't free, that I would like to not have an epidural but I might change my mind.

Didn't write anything down about exams, happy to assume that if they were suggested it would be sensible and like the injection for delivering placenta it was just another thing I'd be happy to decide on there and then.

Something I found really useful to add / discuss was what we’d do in a medical emergency. Would DH go with the baby / stay with me / call his parents / my sister etc?

Birth plan is useful for you and your partner as much as the midwives

I didn't write anything down, all I cared about was having my music and dp with me. The rest I was totally go with the flow about.

This time will be the same with the exception of making it clear I do not want pethidine at all and will be very very unhappy if they push this onto me again like they did in my last Labour.