Considering ellective C section

[Jbow1987]

I am 28 weeks pregnant and terrified of going through birth again, so I am considering an elective C section. I am low risk so there is technically no medical reason, other than my crushing fear and trauma from my last birth.

Has anyone chosen this? Or had a C section? how was it for you? How was the experience and healing after?

My last birth was traumatic. I felt alone, the hospital didn't give me proper care. I was left in an empty room with no bed or midwife for 12 hours, I ended up hysterical and in so much pain from the contractions. I finally got an epidural and had a forcep & episiotomy delivery. I haemorraged after and the doctor had their whole arm up inside me like a cow to stop the bleeding. I spent 6 days in hospital after birth, I couldn't sit down or walk for 2 weeks and my scar never fully healed. 6 years on and it still reopens inside my anus when I pass a stool. I also have to sometimes use my fingers to pass a stool because the anal muscle is damaged from birth.

I also ended up with severe PND, I was self harming (cutting myself) until my daughter was 3 months old. I had thoughts to harm her too and was under perinatal care for 18 months. Through therapy and medication my PND was resolved, but the trauma never left me and I am still on low dose medication now, but doing great and loving life. I can't wait to be mum again, but I cry everyday about going through birth again. I wake in the middle of the night and feel so petrified at the thought all that might happen all again in just a few months time. I want to be able to bond with my baby this time, and not be so completely traumatised.

My midwife has suggested an elective cesarean due to my previous experiences, and I have an appointment on 10th Jan with doctor to discuss further.

Any stories or advice anyone can offer would be greatly received.

I had my first c-section in 2020 and my second 4 days ago.

First one was after a 33 hour labour. Had to have it 10cm and baby was transverse so when they pulled her out, my cervix ripped and I lost 2.5L of blood and had a transfusion. Very difficult recovery.

Second one - I was booked in for an elective this week and my son had other ideas. I'd been warned that as I'd laboured to 10cm first time if I went into labour again, could be very quick. At 39+1, totally normal day and started contracting in the afternoon. Long story short, I was 9cm in only 3 hours and he was ready almost to be pushed out. Some waters were in tact so it was holding him off the last cm but was told he would fly out as soon as the waters went. I held on tight as I wanted another section and even though I'd had a very quick, painful and other full labour, it was a great experience. I'm very mobile and although sore, I felt so in control in theatre, and even though it was classed as another emergency I'd still elected for it over vbac.

That's so great to hear a positive story, thank you. I don't think I would mind a flabby overhang, it will go nicely with my flappy butt hole from the last birth 😆 ... no but seriously, I am ok with my body image altering, I'm a lot less concerned by that this time round. I think it's part of becoming a mum and getting older, we should be proud of our flabby bits 🙌

I'm in the same Primary Care Trust as you and just had an elective c section agreed based on previous birth trauma. They went through the pros and cons and then let me decide, everyone has been really supportive so don't let those kinds of concerns put you off.

Hi @Jbow1987 i had a c section in October. I was in labour for 18 hours bubba didn't arrive so i had an emergency c section.
I didn't feel a thing (had an epidural), I wish i had just had the c section earlier.
In the recovery ward i had a catheter for my pee (sorry tmi), i was given paracetamol and ibuprofen and blood thinning injections.
When i got home i continued to take paracetamol and ibuprofen for a few days and i injected blood thinning injections in my thigh bit for 6 weeks.
Next time i would defo have a c section.
Hope the above helps x

Can understand your reasons. But just to say, I haemorrhaged after my c-section and needed further surgery which involved them using implements via/through my vagina whilst I was awake (spinal block) which still haunts me. No birth is guaranteed complication-free.

Have you considered a home birth as you are low risk? I'm 27 weeks and wanted a home birth as knew id feel less stressed but more supported but sadly am high risk so can't

Had C section since induction didn't work. Wasn't very happy with it initially but I was doing all the household chores from next day including looking after baby. No problems with walking etc. Just took painkillers and felt not much pain. It's not too bad coz I was told my baby was measuring big for me so don't know what the outcome of a vaginal birth could have looked like. But just wanted to say you can be up and doing things from next day after c section. Just avoid lifting anything heavy etc.

I've had 2 sections recovered well after both and would always elect to have a section when having babies.

I had an emergency c section with my first under general anaesthetic so wanted an elective for my 2nd, thought I'd have to fight for it but they just said yeah that's fine 😂 also got sterilised after my 2nd and they had no issues doing that either.

I did go into labour with my 2nd before my elective date but they took me straight down to have my section so don't worry about that either x

Have the section if it will help ease your mind.

I’ve had two, one emergency and one elective due to the trauma I experienced during my first labour. Neither recovery was anywhere even on the same spectrum of what you’ve experienced.

I felt thankful for the much more controlled experience of my elective and it was very very positive. Obviously it’s major surgery, and there can be complications but it really helped me heal from my first experience.

I hope you have a better experience this time.

I thought about a section for similar reasons to you, forceps delivery and really bad recovery that took months.
I've made the decision to go ahead with another vaginal birth but have made it very clear that any sign of struggle I want a section not to be left to have failed ventouse, episiotomy and forceps. The forceps I blame for many post birth issues.
Everyone I know who was had an elective has told me I'm mad to not have had one. But the consultant I met I wasn't keen on (I really should have seen a second), and now I really have left it too late (38 weeks now).
Good luck x

Thank you for sharing, it really helps as I want to make an informed decision. I appreciate hearing all stories, good and bad. Haemorraging again this time round is one of my big fears, and is one of the main reasons I would prefer hospital than home. It haunts me too, so I understand that trauma ❤️. I honestly thought I might die last time (probably a bit dramatic I know but there was so much blood and the doctors looked panicked). I just thank the lord I had an epidudural though, as I have friends who had haemorrages with just gas and air 😱. Do you mind me asking if healing was harder because of your haemorrage and the procedure?

I'm really sorry for your experience, sounds awful. Well done for working through it all. I think choosing a caesar is completely logical.

It sounds like 2 issues, being unsupported during labour, and the actual physical trauma. Do you have support in place for this time?

My sister had a similar terrible first experience and a planned section the next time, she felt much more human and recovered well.

I just had a planned caesar 7 weeks ago, after 4 relatively uncomplicated vaginal births. It went smoothly, but I did find it a quite brutal and confronting experience. I went home the next day, mostly because I felt unsupported in hospital. I'm still not fully healed, my scar is not completely closed so I'm still not back to normal activities/exercise yet.

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

I had an elective c section in July and I have absolutely no regrets at all. I had baby in the afternoon and was up and about first thing the next morning once the catheter was out. I was able to care for baby with no issues tbf, I even was able to pick him up in his car seat when i was discahrged 48 hours later (although not advised) I would have been out after 24 hours but I had high blood pressure in pregnancy so I was keep an extra 24 for monitoring. I'm surprised my recovery was really easy, didn't feel like I'd had major surgery but your mileage may vary. i had no issues with breastfeeding and still do after 5 months, just took a bit longer for my milk to come in. And if you want a section, you dont need to give a reason, i had no medical reason for one, i just wanted it and it was granted, no questions asked and no objections. My body, my choice and all that 🙂 if that's what you want they can't refuse you

Do it. I had an elective section for mental health reasons and it was brilliant. I was so free of fear the entire pregnancy, knowing I didn’t have to go through labour again.

I had a truly horrific first 'normal vaginal delivery' where my son and I nearly died.

Had an elective caesarean second time round. No comparison. If I were to have another baby I would go down this route again. Recovery was great, I healed well. I actually found the whole experience healing from my first birth.

You are well within your rights to request one.

I had an emergency caesarean with my first so was given the option this time round, I’ve decided to go for an elective caesarean. Reasons being I’m having a really hard time with pregnancy this time, bad palpitations, breathlessness, tiredness, just feeling awful and I can’t bare the thought of potentially going over 40 weeks (I was 10 days over with my DD), and then being in labour for hours and hours to potentially having to have another emergency. I’ve not enjoyed this pregnancy unfortunately so given the choice of having a caesarean at 39 weeks was a no brainer for me. I’ve also been told by someone I know that an elective caesarean is much “calmer” than an emergency because you’ve had a decent (ish) night sleep the night before and you’re able to mentally prepare yourself more because obviously you know it’s happening and it’s not such a rush like an emergency.

I found my recovery last time not so bad. My DD had awful reflux and lactose intolerance so the second night (and last night) in Hospital she was hysterical crying and I could hear some of the other Mum’s in the shared ward ‘tutting’ about my DD making a noise so I was in and out of bed trying to console her so I was on my feet with no issues the second night! The only thing I found painful was getting in and out of the bath a week or so after!

I'm so sorry to hear you also went through a traumatic birth. Forcep delivey takes so long to recover from, if we ever do recover fully that is. I am sure this time it will be different for you, you sound strong in knowing what you want and don't want. I think if a positive second birth can happen, it must be so mentally healing, that was one of my main reasons for initially considering another vaginal birth. Do you have a strong birth partner who will also advocate for you? Wishing you so much luck, I really hope it goes well for you this time xx

2 sections.

5 days in hospital with first. 12 weeks of pretty solid pain.

10 days in hospital with second including 5 days in high dependency ward due to post op complications. 12 weeks of serious pain. Including a month of wound infections. 6 months to feel normal.

The actual sections were fine. Just awful and long recoveries.

I technically had an elective C section. I was induced 2 weeks early as my baby was quite big.

After multiple attempts on induction the next step was to break my waters and I refused because I was so tired as I couldn't go home in between induction procedures because I was so early.

The best decision I made was having a c section. No complications and after a week I was walking around fine with no pain.

My baby was born 2 weeks early at 8lbs 11oz so yes I was glad to of been given an elective C Section.

I too was nervous as I'd heard so many horror stories (my SIL gave birth 11 months prior and ended up having sepsis!)

Hope this helps you make a decision OP xx

I had a pretty traumatic first birth, though not as bad as yours, you poor thing. I was also wondering whether to opt for a C-section. The decision ended up being taken away from me, as, due to a serious health problem, I had to deliver via C-section under general anaesthetic.

Anyway, the C-section recovery was far better than I feared. Yes, I was very sore for a few days, but they give you good pain relief. I was home after three nights and took it very easy; after a week I felt much better and after two weeks I felt pretty much normal, although it was another couple of weeks before I could do things like go for a walk in the woods. Baby is 9 weeks now and I'd say I'm totally recovered from the op (could've said this at six weeks to be honest) and my scar isn't giving me any issues at all.

Good luck. I think you'll feel a massive weight off your shoulders once you make the decision.

First birth very long with minimal tearing, second was induction with hideous tearing which led to reconstructive surgery and because of that I had to have a c section and it was preferable to both previous births. I was up having a shower (being washed down by a lovely orderly) as soon as I could stand. It was so relaxed and controlled, I felt very safe and the recovery was easy, I understand all aren't easy but for me it wasn't really a big deal and any discomfort far outweighed the absolute hell of passing faeces after having such a dreadful tear after number 2.

I'd say get the perinatal team to refer you stating all that you've been through both physically and mentally.

@Jbow1987, I'd say you have more than enough reason to want a c section.
And I'd also say, actually, that after the birth (choosing whatever route you decide) you really should insist on help with what I think is a fissure(?). There's no way you should have to put up with that.
Unfortunately, women are regularly dismissed or minimalised when they report medical instances arising from them being, umm, women.
I'm currently fighting for treatment for a recurrent rectocele - which gynaecology say I don't have, but the colorectal team say I do.
The whole situation for women is ridiculous in our current healthcare system. We are regularly viewed as liars. (I had a procedure to do with my gut recently and my pain was scored as a 2 by the nursing and medical team, meanwhile for me it was a 10.)
The only way you can be heard is to say what you need to, over and over, and repeat (what I am sure is true for you), that you don't want to just 'live with it'.
The very best of luck to you.

Same here! Would choose c section over a forceps/episiotomy ANY day! Good luck OP x

I had an emergency section with DD three years ago and am pregnant with no 2, having had four losses in between and a diagnosis of PNA after DD. I had to see a consultant because of my previous losses and the section at my 16w appointment and he asked about my thoughts on the birth. I said “I want a section”, he said, “ok” and wrote it in my notes. I went l, “really, is that it?” because I’d been expecting to really have to advocate for myself, and he replied “No we go with what you want, if you want a section that’s no problem”. Because of your physical issues post birth (which your HC team may actually worry about another vaginal birth exacerbating, hence the early and unsolicited mention of a section) and your MH you may well find you have a similar experience.

For what it’s worth I had a very straightforward recovery from my section, which is one of the reasons I don’t want to mess about with a VBAC. I’m also really well supported at home, but that’s another point you have to take into consideration when you’re weighing it up- but then again with another vaginal you’re risking another bad tear.

Really hoping this birth is a much more positive experience for you and you get the repair you need, it really does sound like you’ve been though the wringer x

I just wanted to say I completely understand how you feel. I had a horrendous birth with my first ending in forceps and episiotomy. I ended up having heart complications too. In hospital for weeks and couldn't bond with my baby, so depressed and anxious afterwards for a year. With my second I was under perinatal mental hewlth and specialist midwives. I chose to have an elective section. Was great. I felt so in control, was able to plan for it, was really peaceful. I bonded with my baby and was able to breastfeed. I was in tesco about 5 days later, recovery was fine. Scar healed well too. That was 3 years ago, I'm planning another baby soon and will have another csection when time comes. Good luck with whatever you decide. X

I loved my elective section. I had a traumatic first birth so insisted on a section for my second - it's your right to request one and they can't refuse, even though some hospitals will try and put you off it. I loved every stage of the section. It was so calm and pleasant. The recovery was an absolute breeze compared to my first birth. I still suffer from the first labour and I'm 13 years on as I had a forceps delivery which destroyed my muscles. I only have a very small and almost invisible scar from my section . Would definitely recommend!