Terrified and intrusive thoughts

[Lolly127]

Currently 30 weeks pregnant . Severe health anxiety and unplanned pregnancy . I’m getting really really scared now . I know o won’t enjoy Christmas as it will be after that we are on birth countdown . Scared ill panic so much I’m gonna have a heart attack and it will be a massive trauma for all . I Csnt imagine even getting to see baby girl . I’m under peri natal , cbt once a week and I just can’t shift the thoughts . Anyone similar have a positive story to share

Oh OP I’m so sorry. What is it you are worried about specifically? The birth? Or something else? I had a lot of anxiety leading up to my first and second births. I did find CBT mildly helpful but struggled to implement the techniques sometimes into my daily life. Is baby doing ok or do you have any concerns? If so you could ask to speak to a midwife or even a doctor/consultant to discuss your fears surrounding childbirth.

If you can afford it see a therapist asap. I had a very similar experience and waited too long (after child was born) to seek help.

You and your baby will be fine but it's difficult to grasp that when you're feeling as you do.

Be very open and very vocal about how you're feeling to everyone.

Good luck OP x

Thanks for your replies . I’m under peri natal and have lots of support , I just can’t seem to shift the doom . I’m convinced I’ll die in childbirth it’s that black and white atm

Would a c section be less scary OP? You are entitled to request one (don't let the NHS bully you on this), might that help?

Sorry to hear you're feeling this way, it's really tough. I struggled with health anxiety and the doom feeling after my first baby.
Sertraline really helped me if that's something you would consider.
I'm 27 weeks pregnant now if you need anyone to talk to :)

Thanks Emily . What were your fears ? Are you much better this time round . Congratulations to you also x

It sounds like you are scared of how scared you will be. Have you spoken with your midwife about pain relief, including epidural? You might also find that once it's happening, your fear will dissolve as you will be engaged with the matter at hand - and I'm not saying that's a substitute for proper pain relief, by the way!

It sounds crazy but I’m not afraid of the pain . I know it will be really rough , but I also know that we all go through it in labour and it’s a normal response . I’m worried about how my body , mainly my heart will cope with the stress . When I panic my heart races and I’m like pacing etc and makes me feel so unwell . I’ve had this checked in the past and it’s all anxiety but I’m worried I’ll give myself heart attack

Hi OP,
I had a panic attack in my c section it was terrifying. I didn't die, nor was I ever going to, but my mind thought I would and I was left with PTSD for a long time.
Pregnant with my second now, and I am being prescribed (extra) medication during this birth. Is that an option for you, particularly as you are under perinatal?

@Thetractorjustmoved are you still active on here?

C-secrion is Major abdominal surgery. Look at the statistics of harm and see that.a natrual birth is better for you and logically come to terms with it.

I would reccomemd Yoga, meditation and pregnancy massages to help relax you mentally and physically. Go into this with an open mind.
All things in life are risky. Your more likely to die walking down your stairs then in childbirth. Put things into perspective.

Positive affirmations is suoer helpful also.

All the best of luck. You logically know your will be fine so work on those thoughts and encourging positivity.

I am normally a confident, balanced, logical person, if anything less anxious than I probably should be at times.
I do really badly with hormones though and had a huge sense of doom during pregnancy for no reason. I didn't even really dare talk about it. I was sure I would lose the baby or they would be seriously injured or have significant disabilities, wasn't sure I'd make it either. The baby was born fine, I'm also fine. So please know that this doom feeling can arise from hormones etc without having any validity and has nothing to do with what will actually happen in your future.

For me the thoughts continued to some extent after birth and during extended breastfeeding. I was sure my baby would die before the age of two and would avoid discussing anything after this age. That baby is 2.5 now, healthy and happy and particularly since stopping breastfeeding my doom feeling has tailed off and I can now think about the longer term ok.

From my experience I wouldn't necessarily expect CBT etc to help (not that I tried it) just because CBT as I understand it is about rationalising, and this doom feeling is absolutely irrational but feels very convincing. I'd look more to things that might make you feel better in each moment while you get through this period of time - e.g spending as much time as possible being around good people, in nature or with pets/animals, doing yoga/meditation/relaxation/walking etc, things that feel comforting to you (dressing gown, fluffy socks, soft toys, snuggling in blankets, hugs), anything that lifts your mood maybe citrus shower gel, sniff or diffuse essential oils you like, watching funny or uplifting tv/films/books, foods that appeal, buy yourself a little present here and there if you can. Literally just being kind to yourself and treating yourself gently, because you are having an unpleasant time living with this feeling just now and you deserve to be looked after, supported and pampered while you get through that.

I still remember after childbirth the enormous and overwhelming feeling of relief at just not being pregnant any more, pregnancy was such a horrible state for me it was just wonderful that it was over, even before it had sunk in that my baby was ok. Maybe that feeling is something worth trying to visualise. You will get there! All best wishes for you and your baby.

Oh op I completely understand. I am being induced Monday and a nervous wreck. My last two births were a bit traumatic and so now I’m in a awful tizzy about this one. But, I also am reassured that it could be third time lucky for me and as scared as I was on the last two, all worked out well in the end. The only thing helping me through is trying to practice mindfulness and also constantly reminding myself the birth is such a small part of a wonderful thing (well afterwards because pregnancy and Labour for me, are generally a bit miserable 😂). With the heart end, they are prepared for any issues (I have a heart problem and worry too it will act up) I know you say you don’t have one, but if something were to go wrong, the vast majority of the time they can fix it. It’s so tough though and I really hope it won’t ruin your Christmas. I know money is tight for most now but can you do anything extra nice for yourself over the next few weeks? Even scheduling in extra self care and relaxing time to try get you through this tough spot? I find my anxiety about this birth has me constantly in fight or flight mode and switched on so I need to take my own advice!!!

Just an update to you all ! I had my girl in feb , nearly one ! Emcs but not a massive emergency , but failure to progress . Labour is wild and I can’t wait to do it again ! That high is something I never prepared for after we had her . I think I was swinging of the ceiling 😂 but we survived , I’m not traumatised and actually enjoyed it . I couldn’t ever imagined me ever saying this ! I was so looked After , but did watch my ecg and bp the whole time haha

This is so good to hear, I’m not due for another 12 weeks and having a melt down

What are your fears honey ? I’ll help
you as much as u can . Been there