ADHD and autism mum, how can I optimise birth this time?

[BetterBeGryffinphwoar]

Long story short, I've recently begun the diagnosis process for ADHD. There's a genetic link in my family, but I never pursued it until events of my first born meant all my strategies unravelled and I had a breakdown.

Anyway, I'm thinking back to my son's birth and wondering whether my ADHD had a significant effect on what made his birth more 'risky'. He has a suspected birth injury so I'd like to avoid that for my new baby, due soon.

He was PROM but I opted to wait for contractions.to start for 48 hours. They didn't. I am wondering if my dopermine low levels effected how oxytocin etc failed to get me started in labour, as statistically I should have started labour after this time.

I was then induced and had insane painful contractions. The kicker being that after ten hours of hell once I was dilated a medical emergency elsewhere meant no midwife attended me and I may have been feeling pushing urges but misinterpreted these and was probably pushing for a long time. When midwives eventually appeared all contractions had stopped. I had oxytocin drip but didn't feel contractions. I did end up pushing him out but I had excellent abdominal muscles from years of sport, which is don't have now.

Obviously now I know risk taking is part of my profile I wouldn't be opting to wait if prom occured again. At the time though, I was a bit misled by the statistics and being assured it would happen (by hyprnobirth practioner)

I know it may not be the cause and there could be a myriad of reasons, but I can't help but think it was my brain chemical imbalance from ADHD that meant my body didn't receive the 'cues'. I don't know if there is much research into how to coax an ADHD brain into following the cues, but would appreciate insights.

I am in a failing health trust system so any help or insight would be appreciated.

Not a medical professional and Don't have adhd, but nothing you've described sounds particularly abnormal, just unfortunate.

Waiting for contractions to start - that's a normal and valid choice, not risky behaviour, maybe not right for you in the end but they would have strongly advised against it if it wasn't safe

lack of natural contractions - there's always exceptions to statistics, that's why they're statistics not facts and why you agreed to a 48h limit on waiting

Dopamine/oxytocin - don't know much about this but I thought the hormone production is driven by the placenta and only really needs to affect the cervix (so very little to do with you or your brain), high levels of stress hormones will block the oxytocin but I don't think low levels of anything should do much at all.

Painful induction - sounds normal

Misunderstood pushing urges - pushing without urges is potentially a problem, not pushing despite urges is fine (excepting medical complications), not having urges is fine, pushing you can't control is fine and normal (whether or not you know about it), this really isn't an issue

potentially long pushing stage - it's not the duration of pushing that's a problem, if there is a problem then it can potentially cause a long pushing stage which might exacerbate it, but the duration of pushing didn't cause it iyswim.

Contractions stopping - can be a sign of transition, particularly after a long or difficult labour, considered normal in some cultures but not well recognised in western medicine and obviously not ideal during induction

Abdominal muscles - to be honest pelvic floor muscles are more use than abdominal muscles anyway, and there are loads of unfit mothers who have straightforward births and healthy babies.

Annecdotally, I had nearly 4 hours of 'pushing' that neither me nor the midwife could identify (she thought I was asleep), baby was fine. I understand that your situation was fundamentally different, and your baby isn't fine, but I think that's just luck. I honestly believe that the brain (adhd or not) has very little to do with natural childbirth.