Tips to bring on labour. Scared to go over EDD due to previous losses

[Hopingforbetterluck]

Has anyone done anything that actually worked to bring on labour.
I’m not due for a while but already panicking about going overdue for various reasons. I’ve had a miscarriage, then MMC then TFMR which as left me fairly anxious this pregnancy as I’m just waiting for something to go wrong and the further I get the more I worry about still birth and my placenta failing as I’m a little older.

I am also terrified of being in labour or in hospital on the anniversary of my TFMR which is possible if I go over. I know the baby will come when they’re ready and there’s not much I can do but the thought of it being the day I lost my little boy is really upsetting to me. I want that day to be about him and to be able to go to where I scattered his ashes.

sorry for the rant but if anyone has anything that worked for them to bring on labour closer to their due date I’d be grateful to hear it.

Can you ask for a c-section? My long awaited baby arrived via c section as I just wanted baby out!!! My consultant agreed when he heard my history. I didn’t want the unpredictable labour with potential for something to go wrong. I was happy to take the harder recovery myself.

Sorry for your loss. I hope you're home and cuddling your newborn by the time the date rolls around.

DS2: sex.
DD1: a big sneeze.

But also, just feeling safe, secure. I read the positive birth book - she talks about creating an environment that you feel good in - dark, quiet, calm.

Keeping fingers crossed for you.

Asked to be induced at 40 weeks

I think theres slight evidence that drinking raspberry leaf tea and eating dates might make a difference. I tried dates, but too late really, and still went overdue. I would look in to it though, it's worth a try.

Nipple stimulation worked for a friend.(2 hours worth)

Best wishes

With my 2nd pregnancy I wanted to go into labour naturally as I was induced with my first resulting in an emergency c section.

When I got to 38 weeks, I had sex with my husband in the afternoon, then afterwards I expressed some colostrum. I started cramping an hour later and my waters broke when I went to bed at 10pm. I think I may have been close to starting anyway though as I felt really drained that morning.

Thanks for the suggestions ❤️
I’m reluctant to request a c-section because of the recovery time and I’ve got a toddler DS to look after but I’ll have a chat with my midwife about the possibility of an induction at 40 weeks. Just a bit worried they’ll fob me of as there’s no medical reason for it at the moment.

I did try raspberry leaf tea with DS and still went over by nearly two weeks so not sure that works for me but I’ll definitely try all the other suggestions!

I’d be talking to the midwife or consultant about inductions and talking to a therapist about how to manage the anxiety about it.

Sex
Currry
Laughter

Lots of walking
Sex
Nipple stimulation (hand or breast pump)
Raspberry leaf tea
All of mine have been born between 39-40weeks but no way of knowing if they would have been born then anyway.

Midwives used to give castor oil and orange juice.

It's quite normal to go over for your first, many of my friends who were induced for first at 42 weeks ended up going naturally at 40 for their second as body was more ready. Some ended up going 41 but was still earlier. I don't know if dates bring on labour per say but they're known to ripen the cervix for more ease in delivery and less complications. I'm currently 39 weeks and trying everything and honestly I don't think anything works. My first came at 39+6 so I'm interested to see when this one comes.

OP you may well already be so don't want to patronise - but midwifery can put you in touch with services to help you manage this anxiety and it sounds like that would be a really helpful thing for you. It doesn't have to be one or the other - you can have both support for your mental health, and support to try and ensure baby doesn't go too far over.

I had a sweep at my 40 week appointment that seemed to get things going. But I wouldn’t rule out an ELCS if it’s really important for you and, given your history, it would be understandable - I had a CS second time around when I had a toddler at home and while it was annoying, we coped. I was pretty much back to normal at 4 weeks so it was really only 2 weeks of allowing the toddler lots of CBeebies and picnic lunches on the floor once DH had gone back to work and as far as I’m aware it didn’t scar her for life to have a very low key few weeks (which tbh I needed with getting bf established etc)

Nothing works short of chemical induction. Most is just old wives tales and in all testing, found to make no difference. Sex, for example, in some studies showed that it delayed labour. Basically, there's no correlation. Raspberry leaf tea is a weird one because it's a uterine tonic recommended to make your second stage shorter and when I had my 1st (a teen now) nobody erroneously linked it with trying to start labour but it's become common/fashionable to suggest it.

I understand, believe me, fears around labour due to previous experience. I've been there and know how debilitating it can be. I only discovered once out the other side of it that there was nothing I could do about that fear because it came from trauma and I needed somewhere to "hang" it iyswim. I projected it onto trying to control certain elements of my ds's labour and delivery and of course, when I couldn't, I spiralled and had a panic attack mid labour! I felt I was failing and the worst was happening. A very lovely, kind and patient senior midwife stepped in and helped me focus on what I could do. She offered support and she listened and she helped me engage with how to deal with the moment and not panic about the theoretical.

I'd wholly recommend talking to your midwife and ask to speak to somebody about what actually can be done to allay your fears rather than pushing yourself to achieve the impossible. You know and acknowledge that babies come when they're ready and you can't fight that with a pineapple and a cup of raspberry leaf tea but you can ask for more support and explore options like induction/CS/extra support.

You can ask for extra monitoring if you go overdue. Although anything up to 42 weeks is considered normal, I have similar anxieties about going beyond 40 weeks and have asked for a scan if that happens to check cord flow and amniotic fluid.

I took mat leave at 32 weeks both times so I could spend 10-12 hours a day on physical birth prep exercises. Both DC came at 40+0.

Thanks everyone. There are some really helpful suggestions here about getting support and asking for extra monitoring after 40 weeks which I didn’t know I could do.
I spoke to my midwife a few days ago and broke down in tears like an idiot but she was really supportive. She’s referred me to the antenatal clinic to discuss early induction and early sweeps etc. I won’t rule out CS but will see what they think.

I really want to do what’s best for the baby and won’t request an early induction as I don’t want to cause the baby any distress or to bring her too early but I’m hoping I can request a slightly earlier sweep than usual then to be induced just before 41 weeks if nothing happens and I will definitely request extra monitoring at 40 weeks to try and put my mind at rest. Hopefully that way I’m not trying to bring about labour before the baby is ready but I would, fingers crossed, be out of hospital on my little boy’s anniversary. If I’m not then I’ll just have to deal with it and what will be will be. I realise I can’t control everything and am trying to keep an open mind. It’s just so hard due to past events and I’m really grateful for all your kind and helpful comments.

Hi OP, I also have been anxious about going over/extra monitoring etc. I'm 40 weeks tomorrow and my midwife offered a sweep last Thursday (didn't happen as cervix was completely closed), she's coming again on Tuesday to try again and then one more time on Saturday. Then I'm booked in for an ELCS a week on Tuesday if things don't kick start naturally (I didn't want an induction). So I'm being seen and baby's being checked every few days which is really helping with the anxiety and the midwives have been amazing about it so you should be able to get the support you need to feel secure heading to the finish line x

@Hopingforbetterluck my due date was the death anniversary of my daughter, I ended up giving birth a day before and they feel totally unrelated x and sweeps won't work if you're not ready anyway so no harm in trying after 39 weeks if your body is ready. If it isn't ready the midwife can tell you and it wouldn't work.