Baby with herpes

[anxiousmumtobeeee]

Have been posting in the
pregnancy group but been advised to post somewhere else..
So I am currently pregnant I want a c section due to my anxiety over my genital herpes. having herpes isn't deemed a good enough reason to have
a medical c section unless you have caught it throughout your pregnancy (if you had it prior then your baby will have antibodies and be at very low risk around 1%-3% risk of catching it, and even if they do the infection would probabaly be mild). however.. I don't want to take the risk, even though its like 1%. im sad because i wanted a vaginal birth, but i am just so anxious about this i feel better eliminating the risk to my baby completley. I don't want baby to even have a mild infection, especially as its a virus that lives with you forever. I couldn't deal with the guilt. midwife just says 'well there are worse things baby can get like HIv.' she's made me feel stupid for worrying about this and wanting the section but I still want it. I know my worry is disproportionate to the risk but still, it should be valid?

2nd question is i've read that babies that did get born vaginally and get the mothers antibodies could get the infection but it would only be mild illness or are completely asymptomatic and just carry the virus. my query is, if they are asymptomatic (so you don't even know they caught it) can it pop up at any point and where on their body??? or ,if they had neonatal herpes and then recover from it, can they get flare ups/ become symptomatic at any point in their life and Will they have it on their genitals or face?

How pregnant are you? Have you seen the consultant and been denied a c section?

34 weeks. I am awaiting an appointment with the consultant but the midwife has been useless so hopefully the consultant is more helpful. Its just a very hard decision to make and terrifying to think of going for the section and regretting it, hence trying to get advice from real people who may have been through it and seen what they did.

Good Lord! Calm down already. Do you really think they'd let you give birth to a child that would likely be abnormally disabled in some way due to an STD?
Do you know that a huge proportion of people carry the Herpes virus? Myself included. I've given birth to four babies since being told I have herpes and no HCP ever mentioned it. All my children are beautiful, healthy and bright. Please relax....your fears are crazily disproportionate.

It's lucky for you that you didn't pass the virus on, but other people have done and thats the reality. There is a risk, and where there is risk there should always be choice.

@anxiousmumtobeeee I think @whatsinaname2 was trying to point out, she didn’t actually mention if she passed the infection to her children - she just said they were all healthy, bright, and beautiful. You assumed that those two things couldn’t be true together - her statement and that her children were infected. I think you may be under a lot of stress about this issue.

Do you know when you acquired your genital herpes? I don’t want to dismiss your concern, but to be so focused on this does seem like a sign of anxiety. The odds are so small - it’s already less than 1%, and then 50-80% of infants who become infected during birth are from mothers who acquired their herpes during pregnancy (that’s why I asked when you acquired your infection). There are several possible birth issues with much higher rates of possibility that could concern you, so it feels a bit like perhaps you’ve latched onto the one you feel like you can control? And that’s natural. Labor and delivery are such an uncontrollable process, for the most part, and you’re trying to do the absolute best for your baby.

Paper about the seriously reduced risks unless you acquired your herpes infection during pregnancy:
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2780322/

But I would just say this. All the medical lit says that mothers with an active herpes outbreak during labor are more likely to pass it to their babies. If you’re not having an outbreak when you go into labor, if you didn’t acquire the infection during your pregnancy, then your risk is so much smaller than a host of other possible baby problems you can’t control for by having a C-section. Don’t deny yourself a vaginal birth, if that’s what you want. Speak to the consultant, tell them your concerns, because it’s okay to have concerns, and maybe just have a plan for a c-section if you have an outbreak.

Yes it's absoloutley because I can control it. C sections are so common now I'm not concerned at all about any risks to baby with that, the risks are more to me and that's fine. Yes it's 1-3% however why would you take that as a mother when you could eliminate that risk to 0?? Yes you can be bright and healthy with herpes..I certainly am! But also, maybe I don't want that for my children...its a lifelong, ANNOYING virus that I cannot imagine living with because my mum gave me it. I live with it knowing I got it myself..but passing it to my baby and them having to worry and think about the flare ups throughout their life even if mild, doesn't seem fair and its me that would have to live with myself knowing I gave them it.

It's your choice. If the anxiety is too much then you need to hold your ground with your consultant about wanting a c-section. Make sure you bring someone who can support and advocate for you if you get flustered or pressured

It's your choice. NICE guidelines suggest that you should be offered a CS if you want one. Anxiety is a perfectly valid reason. Do not take no for an answer if this is what you want. I suspect you will find that the consultant is perfectly happy to sign off on one. Attitudes have changed a lot since the various maternity care scandals and it's currently a brave consultant who denies a CS even on the basis of maternal preference alone (sources: I'm a healthcare lawyer, I've had one CS and am due to have another shortly)