A question for Hindu mums

[PrettyCandles]

I am going to visit a Hindu friend who is in confinement after just having had her second baby. She said I didn't need to bring anything, but I think that was loneliness and baby blues speaking. I would like to bring her something - is there anything traditional to bring, or to avoid? If I bring her food (vegetarian, obviously) is there anything that is frowned upon, or considered particularly good for a new mum?

I'm not Hindu but my husband is (so don't take my word for it) - his family brought a variety of the usual gifts. Hopefully you will get some more helpful replies! You could get some Indian sweets but my experience is that the younger members of the family are less keen on them (and often these are given out by the happy parents/grandparents to others in celebration in fact). My husband's family aren't veggie either by the way.

I second what SazzaK says - my dh is Hindu too. The gifts we received from his side of the family when ds was born were of the usual kind and I don't recall anything traditional being bought or anything to particularly avoid. They were all for the baby though so maybe get something nice for your friend ?

My mil did have a sort of 'tit for tat' gift buying system going on though, as she noted all gifts that her friends had bought us down in a little book so that she knew who and what level of gift to reciprocate when her friends had gc. I do wonder what she deemed an appropriate return gift for the people who got our ds a pair of white lacy girl's tights !!

my DH as well, so for us , the usual range of gifts
Winetime, my MIL does that too.
The same for weddings and in fact all celebrations.
If she is not there when i open gifts, I have to write it all down for her

I'm not Hindu but a lot of my father's relatives are - they just give the usual baby gifts. I'd suggest something nice for your friend - so she can pamper herself - as well as the usual for the baby (but if clothes, get it in a larger than newborn size - I got so many newborn things for dd that never got used as she grew so quickly)

Darrell, I wasn't sure if it was an 'Indian' thing or just one of her little idosyncrasies and there was no point asking my dh as he is clueless about his own culture. She would also stress to us that we had to update her on any gifts she hadn't seen us open.

I think there is an army of Indian MILs noting every gift down, and then re-giving the same level of gift, or the same amount of money
Teehee, re what would be appropriate response to a pair of lacy white tights.
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Especially if the tights-giver went on to have a baby boy!

Thanks.

Yep, another Indian MIL here noting down the Shagan!! "To ye that give shall be given"...

I can't think of any particular gift that is a tradition for hindus but in our family (hindu) it is traditional to place a piece of silver in the baby's palm for good luck when first meeting it - like a (clean and washed) 50 pence piece. Most of my family put a tenner in the cot as well which was good!

I'd say a box of Indian sweets is a lovely idea and very thoughtful if you manage to find a shop that stocks nice ones. Generally Hindus always break out the "ladoos" (big orange ball like sweeties) on all special occasions - it's kind of like the Hindu equivalent to champagne!

Not a hope of finding Indian sweets in our provincial little town - I tried to find Mighty Malt or Supermalt this morning and nobody had even heard of it! (I know that's not Indian, more like West Indian, but it's supposed to be very good for postnatal mums.)

But I've got a little outfit for the baby, and a bag of crystalised tropical fruit for the mum. Dried fruit is always good for you after giving birth .