Depressed - Prolapse

[MsWhat]

Hello to anyone that might be able to help!

Im 6 weeks PP and after having been stitched up wonky I thought I would brave a look and I have been in a state of deep sadness since.

Aside from the dodgy labia I now have, my vaginal opening isn't an opening anymore. It seems to be full of... flesh. There is also a little peak of flesh that sort of pokes out down the bottom. And as if that wasn't enough, my urethra is gaping! Like an actual hole.
I instantly lost my mind and called 111, got a same day GP Appointment. He looked whilst I was laying down and said he didn't see any prolapse but sent me to the local hospital. When I was there, a doctor saw me and again, whilst lying down Said she thinks I have a small prolapse on the back wall. Told me to do PFE and sent me on my way?!

I have not stopped crying since and it is ruining my time with my daughter. I just want to disappear.

Has anyone else had this? The only sensation I have is the slight feeling of maybe a finger just about to enter (sorry if too graphic) but no other feelings.

I feel like I'm 80 years old and that my body I'd ruined. As there's no vaginal hole I'm worried thats my sex life finished and obviously my marriage is worrying me. Can this flesh go back in with pelvic floors?? Anyone else's pee hole look like that??

I'm 35 and this was my first (and only) baby.

Please help I'm on the edge

Hi i think its very early days. I had a 2nd degree tear with my eldest and had to have loads of stitches and it took ages to start feeling ok again to even think about having Sex. He is 13 now but i can remember being terrified of going to the loo cause i just thought everything was going to fall out. I also had no sensation when i went for a wee and wet myself a few times.

, OP.

I wrote a long reply then the computer froze! Short version is that I had exactly the same, but slightly worse. However, I somehow managed to have another baby less than 2 years later and, 20 yrs on, I barely notice the problems (having far better sex than when I was younger, collapsing cervix is now just an occasional nuisance rather than something I dwell on). Pelvic floor exercises did help with urinary incontinence, but not the prolapse (because that's what mine definitely is). I'm the only person who has ever noticed my urethra! I can't say "it will get better", because some physical damage can't be undone - but what will get better is the rawness of it all, and your own perception of what was done to you. It will take time, though.

It’s still very early days and this kind of thing is really common OP. Try not to worry.
You can self refer to womens health physio- they are lovely and super helpful. I thought I was doing my pelvic floor exercises ok but they were looking for much more effort! It was definitely worth going.

@MsWhat I am feeling similar about down there, definitely doesn't look the same. I could never even see my urethra before but now I have an obvious hole too. I blame the catheter they put in when I was in theatre (for postpartum haemorrhage and retained placenta)! I also think the inside looks different I can also see flesh instead of the obvious vagina entrance that I had before giving birth however it doesn't poke out or anything and my husband and me have had sex since with no issue. I think it seems worse looking than it actually is to us? Please try not to worry yourself as you have been examined and they didn't have any concerns. Have you tried putting a finger or anything in yourself to feel? I did this before I considered having sex with my husband and had I not looked in the mirror, I wouldn't have noticed a change except maybe it's a little bit looser! It is a shock having your body change but it's an amazing thing giving birth to a baby. No one can have exactly the same stomach/vagina afterwards.

@ComeUnderMySexBlanket Thank you for the reply. When you say you had a prolapse, did you have tissue bulging out? Did that resolve itself? If it did, how long did that take?

@2020mission Thank you. I was expecting some changes, but I thought the Picasso labia were probably change enough! I have gone to insert a finger a couple of times, but I can't feel an obvious entrance anymore then I start feeling worse about the whole thing.

@Whattochoosenow I hope so! I'm hoping the flesh... tucks back up or something. I'm in a dark place right now. Is there a particular governing body that you refer to for physio?

OP ask at your GP surgery. There was a poster up on the notice board at mine and the clinic was at the hospital. If you can’t get through to your GP maybe ask the hospital switchboard?

@MsWhat Yes - I did have tissue bulging out. Still do, in fact (though, weirdly, its position depends on where in my cycle I am). I did get very upset about it in the earlyish days, not least because I could feel it hanging down below my labia and sort of pressing on my pants (sorry if TMI). I went to see a (female) gynae, who was completely dismissive of it and basically said it wasn't a prolapse and I was wasting her time. Maybe she was right, but I wasn't in the frame of mind to hear that, so went away crying and feeling even worse.

I then saw someone else a while later (because it was still bothering me so much), and he said it was a 'moderate' cervical prolapse. To me, it felt major - but his advice was that any treatment (operation) was likely to have a worse outcome than what I was already living with. However: this was 20 years ago, and it may well be that things have changed since then. I did have to put some cones up my vagina at some point to try to strengthen the muscles by holding the cones up there, though that didn't do much for the prolapse. My cervix is so low that I can easily feel it with my fingers, and there's what looks like a great big satsuma or something at the entrance to my vagina (again, sorry if TMI).

I can't really remember what happened between then and now, other than an ELCS on medical advice. Not sure how I conceived DC2, but I suppose I must have been able to have sex. As I say, I mostly don't notice it now, even though I don't think it's changed much if at all. I seem to remember there being a point when I decided it evidently wasn't going to get any worse, even if it wasn't getting better, and that helped me to live with it - I'd been basically terrified that my entire inner workings were going to fall out of my vagina ☹️ But that has not happened. It does mean, though, that I can't use tampons or a Mooncup or the coil, because they won't stay put - but I can cope with that.

All that said: definitely ask your GP. I would hope that things have moved on a bit since my experience. It is still very early days for you. I was so battered by the first birth that it was months before I could even look down there, never mind try anything manual. I was completely traumatised by the whole thing, so you have all my sympathy.

I’m so soeur to hear this. I am in a similar situation five months PP after my second baby. I have a grade 2/3 rectocele (bowel prolapse) and a grade 1 cystocele (bladder prolapse). I saw a Women’s health physio privately and my GP, who has referred me to a gynaecologist (appointment in September due to delays.)

In the meantime I’ve done my own research and am doing the following:

• Hypopressives (form of pelvic floor rehab that has good clinical results for prolapse). Takes a while to learn the technique but then gets easier. I do this online a few times a week with an amazing Pilates teacher called Simone who runs Re-centre. There’s a lady on Instagram called Hypopressives with Alice who is an ex midwife I think and she has lots of info about the impact on prolapse

• I’m really careful about my diet to ensure I avoid constipation which would mean straining. Lots of water and veg etc. I put my feet up on a little stool when I go to the loo to help.

• pelvic floor exercises when I can, but remembering to release too so it’s not too tight or just one way

• I joined a FB group recommended on here for women with prolapse but they were mostly having surgery etc and we’re in more serious situations, so I left as I wanted to remain more positive!

I haven’t had sex yet after this baby but I’ve heard that prolapse shouldn’t impact it.

Could you see a women’s health physio privately? They would be more encouraging and knowledgeable about non-evasive treatment. I felt the GP I saw was quite dismissive and I felt crap afterwards - she referred me, which is what I wanted, but I found the experience a bit upsetting.

Ohhh I really feel for you - I was in the same position as you, now 20 months postpartum and I promise it gets better!! I was told by my GP that I didn't have a prolapse too but knew I definitely did so I saw a woman's physio privately - I'd really recommend this as they're so helpful, understanding and make you feel like you're not alone.
6 weeks really is early days, I was absolutely gutted about it as well but it's not ruined anything at all and I have learnt to accept it now. Sex isn't an issue either, I barely have any prolapse symptoms now other than a heavy feeling occasionally when walking (being pulled by my dog 😂). Please please please don't worry - I know easier said than done.
I'd also recommend this podcast: whymumsdontjump.com/
Take care xx

@Nightmanagerfan Sorry for the delay responding. I've since had another doctor look and are now saying back and front prolapse, grade 2. I've got my GP to refer me.
Do you think you'll have the surgery at all? I just want to be put back together ASAP....

@Emily29 What type/ grade of prolapse do you have, if you don't mind me asking?

I'm sick with worry that I will have problems lifting my daughter or even just living a normal life... carrying bags, exercising. Are you able to do everything you did before??

@MsWhat Uterus prolapse between grade 1-2.

I was the same, but you can still live a normal life and do all of those things! I definitely spent far too much time overthinking it and making myself miserable which now I regret but it's only natural to feel that way.

My physio said exercise is important because you need to strengthen your glutes, stomach etc. as they all have a part to play in supporting your pelvic floor.

The only thing she told me to avoid is jumping (trampolining) and if I wanted to run (which I don't) is that there's more specific training needed first but definitely no reason why I can't in the future with the right training.

I try to do low impact HIIT exercises, and lots of squats she said are good to do but need to make sure the technique is right. I'd definitely see a physio privately if you can as they can give you all the details which would be tailored for you.

Honestly I forget I even have a prolapse most days, don't get me wrong there are times it still gets me down but I promise it gets easier :)

@FF85 Thank you so much for your message. Can you tell me what aftercare advice you've been given? My main concern is that I would never be able to lift my daughter afterwards. I'm not really an exercise person so running etc doesn't worry me, but thinking I couldn't swing her around and play with her destroys me. She's only 2 months and I would miss so much.
Has the recovery so far been painful? Will you keep me updated on how you're getting on? X

Hi,
I had a grade 1 bladder prolapse after the birth of my first, and I paid privately to see a pelvic health physio. I completely corrected this with pelvic floor exercises within a few weeks. I’m not saying this is possible with a grade 2, but pelvic floor exercises when done properly do wonders.
The urgency to wee was also massively reduced by cutting out the coffee I was having.
I also did some training to help not leak when coughing or sneezing, it was like training to hold before a deliberate cough. I then moved to doing the training when stood up, then holding weight (my daughter) as I was boiling the kettle or something. I do my training several times a week, I think it will be a life long thing.

I just wanted to send support, because even though everything is ok down there functionally, it still doesn’t look the same as it once did. That’s normal. You are really newly post partum and things will settle, but definitely keep plugging away with the referrals.
Sending solidarity and support x

@Hellobunnyrabbit That's so positive to hear! Can i ask, when did you get your prolapse diagnosis and when did you start Private physio?
When you say completely corrected, do you mean a professional told you that you were now prolapse free?
I'm coming to peace with things looking differently, but the thought of my organs sliding out and affecting my life really frightens me. If I can get to a point where I've just got a slouchy ugly vagina, I will be over the moon!
Thank you for taking the time to send me a message x

@MsWhat
I think it must have been about 10-12 weeks post partum, the 6 week check i had at my GP was nice and everything but I felt she wasn’t confident in checking for diastasis recti (abs separation) so i booked private. It’s the best money I’ve ever spent on myself.
Your pelvic floor needs strength in the core so if you have abs separation you will need to adjust that too (physio told me).

Yes after a couple of sessions I was completely prolapse free. She assessed me thoroughly and on my last session I had said I feel good but it’s been a bit heavy abs she felt and said the scar from my episiotomy had got a bit stuck, so she massaged it and it went away again!!
However what I will say though is that when I am due on my period, things feel heavier and I have to work harder at my exercises (told that is normal) and also, drinking caffeine properly messes with my bladder so I’ve cut it as much as I can.

I completely get the worry, this part is hard and isn’t your new normal - your hormones will still be making your ligaments soft and it takes time for it all to firm up again. Be kind to yourself x

*and not abs!!!

Can vouch that it’s very early and there is a good chance things will improve, you are brave looking so soon I was too afraid but knew there were issues and gp sent me back to the hospital after looking. They said give it more time, I didn’t believe things could improve but they did insanely so. Took time mind you for sure, personally after a forceps birth on my first it was nearly nine months of healing for me! Had my second and way better this time around I’m at the nine month mark and no real issues!!!

6 weeks is too soon to expect to have gone back to your new normal. For me if was 3 months until sensations returned. Relax, give your body time to recover

Hi OP, same as you but at 41years old with first baby. Took me 2 GP appointments to be referred and consultant suggested I had minor operation to put it back in place. I did not have this until age 46 as had another surprise baby at 42 years old . Did pelvic floor exercises and didn't run or trampoline until after operation and now run 5k Park runs at 53. Please go for a post birth feedback with consultant midwife to talk through what happened at the birth. Every hospital has one and they explain everything in your notes and answer questions. After my first DC I was convinced I couldn't have another child as too damaged but I was reassured and DC2 was born 14 months after first one. It really does take a few months for body to heal and supportive health professionals which there are many of. Don't give up your sexlife is not over . Wishing you all the best.

I meant to say I didn't have operation until later on as I was scared but should of had it straight away as it was the best thing.

6 weeks is very early to make judgements.

I was referred to gynae and ano rectal following birth of DS2. Had physio and various tests done to test the damage.

I had epitosomy plus a third degree tear into my rectum as well as nerve and muscle damage front and back.. Slight pro lapse which went back in time.

I can't advise on what to expect but I can say at six weeks I had no bladder or bowel feeling, couldn't walk far without feeling immense pressure in rectum and couldn't move without tearing again.

However in time sensations did come back, I'm as recovered as I will get, I have a good sex life and I can chase around after my crazy toddler.

I still have scarring down below and an odd little bulge of skin. All looks a little wonky however everything works. Only person who looks is me in the mirror.