Free birth

[Bluffysummers]

Any one free birthed? What was your experience and why?

I’m not pregnant nor do i plan to be. But I follow a few doulas on social media and they often refer to a free birth, basically for any one who doesn’t know without any trained medical personnel. I’m just really curious. Home broth I can definitely see the appeal, although not for me personally but can see why someone would want to. For a freebirth the fact no one medically trained is on hand is a little scary to me, the what ifs would worry me, esp in light of the ambulance crisis in the UK

This is a no judgement no shaming post, I’m just really interest in experiences. Why, if the lack of medical personnel in event of emergency did scare you, any regrets?

I myself have a had 2 hospital births, 1 delivery unit and one MLU (definitely preferred the MLU)

So that was a home birth @USaYwHatNow? And that doula just completely got in the way and obstructed you from doing basically everything? That poor mum and dad, I bet they’ve never forgiven themselves for being sucked in and that doula will just get on with her life and chalk this one up to ‘mother nature’. I think it’s all well and good saying you can rely on baby being active during labour, but in the midst of regular contractions, I couldn’t feel anything, not necessarily because baby wasn’t moving but because of the pain, apparently it’s really common.

Are there any consequences for that doula? If it was a doctor there’d be investigations and They might be struck off.

I had a midwife before who said she hated having a doula present because the ones she’d ‘worked’ with were like pit bulls interfering in everything. I feel some what cheated lol as mine was the laziest woman ever and did absolutely nothing

@Bluffysummers it was a planned freebirth but with doula 'support'. By the time the mother realised something was wrong and demanded to be transferred to hospital it was too late. The aftermath occurred at the hospital. We had no idea this was all going on until she tipped up to the labour ward in an ambulance.

Im not sure in terms of what happened to that doula, aside from the fact that she was banned from providing 'in hospital' support. I assume the parents could press charges for misrepresentation, as its illegal to present yourself as a midwife when you're not qualified to do so

Sorry I’m @‘ing you loads @USaYwHatNow it’s just so harrowing! Even in hospital she got in the way of your trying to listen to the fetal heart beat? Ffs. And no resus? Actually thinking of it one of the HB groups I was on, did praise a woman who’s baby wasn’t breathing on delivery for keeping calm and resisting ressus and doing skin to skin and the baby came around because the cord was still attached, and I wonder if that’s what this doula was trying to emulate?

God this person needs to be named and shamed (not saying you have to here of course) but they need like a wanted poster in all the local hospitals and be warned against. She’s deadly. Makes me so cross because it’s all preventable

Wow, there is so much that needs unpicking in some of the comments here!

I freebirthed my third baby, after my first baby was born after interference and intervention without consent and coercion. Second baby at home where I found the midwives interfering and ultimately stopped me being fully in the zone and aware of my own body. Decided that I would only call the midwives in my third birth if I felt that I needed them (ie not because I was "supposed" to). Baby was born very smoothly, I was fully in control and with deep awareness of every stage because I was able to focus and trust my body. My husband was there too as he was the only person I wanted around.

People will always say that it is risky, that babies die and that mothers choosing freebirth are stupid/selfish etc blah blah but these people sadly lack a proper understanding of true physiological birth and a mother's deep awareness of her body if allowed to let this develop. Repeating and exaggerating the risks just drives women underground. There is a lot of work to do in learning about why women make these choices because unfortunately it isn't always a positive choice and often comes at the cost of maintaining working relationships with HCPs. Women want and deserve better than the current NHS midwifery offering and they should not be blamed for turning away from a system that is not fit for purpose. If women want something different to what is offered then it is the system that needs to change, not the women!

Freebirth is not for everyone and I would never "recommend" it, but women who actively choose it and do the internal work to prepare should be trusted and respected for their choice. It is naive to think that midwives and consultants are the gatekeepers to all knowledge around birthing babies. There is so much knowledge among people who are not formally qualified in birth but unfortunately the 'mainstream' completely ignore and discredit this wisdom.

The fact is that there are many many more women out there who have freebirthed than you will ever know because most of them will never tell you, simply because there is so much ignorant judgement out there, as evidenced in these comments.

There is so much knowledge among people who are not formally qualified in birth but unfortunately the 'mainstream' completely ignore and discredit this wisdom.

Do you mean Doulas?

If I had been stupid enough to take this route when I was pregnant with my first child, she would have died and goodness knows what would have happened to me. All my antenatal checks had been fine. It was noted that she was quite a big baby but nothing out of the ordinary about her position was noticed. When I went into labour the midwife spotted immediately that my daughter was breech. I ended up having an emergency C section. She was fine, I was fine, great outcome for both of us, but the decision to do that was taken because I hadn't progressed to the second stage of labour at all. She was stuck. I was told later it was a frank breech presentation - she was jackknifed and her ankles were up by her ears. No way I would ever have delivered her from that position, given her size (well over 4kg).

@Ohwhathaveidonenow

Wow, there is so much that needs unpicking in some of the comments here!

I freebirthed my third baby, after my first baby was born after interference and intervention without consent and coercion. Second baby at home where I found the midwives interfering and ultimately stopped me being fully in the zone and aware of my own body. Decided that I would only call the midwives in my third birth if I felt that I needed them (ie not because I was "supposed" to). Baby was born very smoothly, I was fully in control and with deep awareness of every stage because I was able to focus and trust my body. My husband was there too as he was the only person I wanted around.

People will always say that it is risky, that babies die and that mothers choosing freebirth are stupid/selfish etc blah blah but these people sadly lack a proper understanding of true physiological birth and a mother's deep awareness of her body if allowed to let this develop. Repeating and exaggerating the risks just drives women underground. There is a lot of work to do in learning about why women make these choices because unfortunately it isn't always a positive choice and often comes at the cost of maintaining working relationships with HCPs. Women want and deserve better than the current NHS midwifery offering and they should not be blamed for turning away from a system that is not fit for purpose. If women want something different to what is offered then it is the system that needs to change, not the women!

Freebirth is not for everyone and I would never "recommend" it, but women who actively choose it and do the internal work to prepare should be trusted and respected for their choice. It is naive to think that midwives and consultants are the gatekeepers to all knowledge around birthing babies. There is so much knowledge among people who are not formally qualified in birth but unfortunately the 'mainstream' completely ignore and discredit this wisdom.

The fact is that there are many many more women out there who have freebirthed than you will ever know because most of them will never tell you, simply because there is so much ignorant judgement out there, as evidenced in these comments.

@Ohwhathaveidonenow thanks for posting your experience, it’s really interesting to read.

Can I ask you (not in a goady way) but how would you know when an actual emergency was, or a situation that warranted a midwife? Was it recent? Were you worried that in a situation that you needed help from a medical person that no one would be able to come and then you’d potentially be in danger.

I’m glad it all worked out for you.

Did you have ante natal care?

Forgot add the key point to my birth story - there is absolutely no way I'd have known what was going on in my body and nothing I could have done about it without skilled medical assistance. The arrogance and naivete of saying a woman knows what's going on in her body is astounding.

The arrogance and naivete of saying a woman knows what's going on in her body is astounding

Seriously?!

Yes, seriously. When I went into labour I didn't know that my daughter was in the breech position and there is nothing I personally could have done to deliver her.

Similarly, when I was pregnant with my son, I didn't know that there was a medical problem with the placenta. It was picked up by a routine scan and thanks to regular monitoring after that he was induced early and delivered in good health, which he wouldn't have been otherwise, as the placenta was already showing signs it was starting to fail.

People will always say that it is risky, that babies die and that mothers choosing freebirth are stupid/selfish etc blah blah but these people sadly lack a proper understanding of true physiological birth and a mother's deep awareness of her body if allowed to let this develop.

I was on a Freebirth group and babies did die sometimes before due dates and without medical care - there was sympathy expressed but mostly a view that the death was natural and could not be prevented

Personally I think anyone who plans a free birth with absolutely no medical personnel present, no scans, no checks is absolutely selfish and incredibly self centred. I will never understand how someone can claim to love their unborn child while knowingly and happily putting them and the mother themselves at such risk.

I see a lot of people on VBAC groups free birthing because they so desperately want a fanny badge that they’ll stop at nothing to get one, even if that means free birthing. I’m going for a VBAC and knowing the risk of my uterus rupturing is 1 in 200, and if that does happen there are approximately 6 minutes between rupture and fetal death or severe brain damage.. is not a risk I would take by any means at all.

I did read something a while back about way back in the day when we were practically cavemen, women would die so often during childbirth, so the baby resembles the father so it would help the father to accept, bond and raise their baby and not leave it to die.

We should be thankful that we’ve evolved from those scenarios and are able to prevent so many maternal and fetal death.. with fetal doctors, midwives, sonographers..

@iamsoreadyforbednow It might be interesting to consider what events lead up to your previous caesarean and whether they could have been avoided? Chances are it was an intervention such as a sweep prior to 42 weeks that set the wheels in motion down the wrong path. Everything is risky you know.

@AnotherVice

Chances are you couldn’t be more wrong.. my placenta failed and baby wasn’t getting enough blood flow or oxygen. My body was the problem not the professionals that saved my child’s life.