Baby blues, please help me :-(

[Bunny2607]

Hi all
I had my 2nd baby by planned c section on friday last week so today is day 5 and the baby blues have hit bad. I got so anxious last night when it got dark and i just didn’t sleep at all last night, maybe got 2-3 hours, even though the baby slept fairly well. My heart was racing and i was panicking wondering if we have made a mistake having a 2nd baby. I told my husband how i was feeling and he’s been so supportive and understanding, iv also spoken to the midwife and GP today and explained to them. I’ve cried all day today, parts of the day i have sobbed my heart out. I’m praying it lifts soon but i just wondered if anyone can share their experiences? I’m wanting to be back in hospital the moment it starts getting dark as i feel safe and secure there, even though all weekend when i was in i hated it! Please someone tell me it gets better and i haven’t made a big mistake x

It gets better. Stay in touch with your midwife. Your hormones are changing rapidly at this point. If it's not better in 2 weeks that's when they look at PND etc

And glad your husband is understanding

Hope you're feeling a bit better today @Bunny2607. You've done absolutely the right thing in talking to your DH and the MW

Thank you both.
Midwive came again today and I was tearful when she came. She’s reassured me its normal but if it carries on then to obviously get some help. I have had a better day today, husband still being amazing, just conscious its getting dark soon so hoping i don’t get really anxious again.

It really is so so common. You're doing the right thing, just keep engaging with MW. If you think it's not getting better they might have a mental health midwife they can refer you too.

I cried so many times in the 3 days after my baby was born, then on day 4 I felt like a different person. Hang in there, I hope it passes soon and well done for speaking to midwife/GP to get that support in place if needed.
Congratulations on your new baby :)

It is normal to feel like this and I’m glad you’ve told people in real lif.What is making you feel anxious at night? Is there something you can do this evening to help alleviate these feelings before they become overwhelming?

Writing a list? Having a bath? Having a drink and a snack at the bedside for you whilst feeding? Making sure your phone or kindle is charged for if you’re struggling to get back to sleep? Downloading an audio book or some relaxing music?

I had the exact same, down to the fears of the night.

What helped me was knowing I could wake DH up for help or to chat & also messaging a friend on a different time zone.

You can come back to this thread if you are awake in the night and someone will be here for a virtual handhold.

It also helped me to look at the moon & think about all the women around the world awake at the same time, looking at the same moon, also up with/nursing their babies. And all the women, including my grandmothers, who potentially had done the same years and years before.

You’re doing really, really well. Hour by hour, day by day and you’ll turn that corner.

OP this happened to me on day 5 too. Crippling anxiety that kept me awake all night. It was awful. I wished I could be admitted to hospital and sedated to escape it. What I learnt was that distraction is a really good technique so I watched as many movies or TV shows as I could whenever I could and tried to think about the plot,/storyline whenever I got anxious ( which was worse when it was dark like u say). Basically tried to avoid my thoughts spiralling into more and more anxiety because the sensation of anxiety is so bad that it makes you feel even more anxious ( if you see what I mean). Really good u spoke to your GP. If it persists then CBT could be useful. Good luck!!

Helen Kennerley wrote a good book called Overcoming Anxiety which explained why we get anxious very well ( and all the symptoms like heart racing)

Thank you everyone for your support. Just coming back to update incase anyone finds this thread in the future. I’ve kept talking to the midwives each time they have been and told them i’m tearful and they have reassured me lots which has helped. I’ve also asked them to come more often than normal which hasn’t been a problem, and iv kept having a cry when i need to and had loads of support from my husband. Baby is a week old today. The worst days for me were monday to Wednesday which were days 3-5. I’m feeling better today, not 100% but each day i can tell i’m feeling better.
Still get anxious around 4pm when i know the night is coming, but once its actually dark i seem to calm down. My mum said to me to try change how i see the dark and see it as an opportunity to get cosy and warm, so light candles etc and watch some nice tv which has helped.
It just felt like a suffocating fog on days 3-5 and i hated every minute but i just want to reassure anyone reading this that it does get better and just keep talking to the midwives etc.

It is more common than you think and it isnt talked about nearly enough.
We recently brought DD into our lives, our first child.
For the first week i was exhausted and emotional.
By day 5 i was a wreck. I was told by the midwife that DD had dropped alot of weight and blamed myself. Id been feeding round the clock. I was in pain and DD was always hungry.
I felt like a failure and I just couldnt cope.
Nights were the worst because I couldnt sleep for fear of something happening to her.
I had a day of crying non stop and asking for DH just to take her away from me because i wasnt capable of looking after her.

The 2nd week was better. I still cried but i think i was so sleep deprived it was unreal.
Were 10 weeks into our new family life and while there are days im exhausted, I xouldbt be happier with DD.

Hang in there, youre doing something amazing.
The days pass so quickly. Enjoy all of those newborn cuddles 😊