Doulas. What makes a good one?

[OrmIrian]

I've been pondering this for a long while. Having been blessed with 3 easy(ish) and joyful deliveries, I associate birth and labour with one of the best times in my life. However I am very aware that many women approach it with great trepidation.

I've had a quick look at the doula UK website but would love to know, from any MNers that have experience of being or using a doula, what qualities are needed most of all? And if you used a doula what did you find most beneficial? And on a horribly practical note, is it possible to actually make a living from doula-ing? Sadly it has to be an issue for me as I'd be giving up a job that keeps me solvent, if not exactly happy.

Hope no-one minds me asking.

Can I simply say ME? Or is that terrible? lol!

Okay in all seriousness...

Not all of my clients approach birth with trepidation. Some just want the surety of a constant presence throughout their labour. Some want an advocate for their wishes (sometimes mws are really pushed for time. My most recent client gave birth on Christmas Eve and the hospital was heaving with hardly enough staff).

What clients have said afterwards is (in it's simplest form) "We couldn't have done it without you and don't understand why others wouldn't have a doula". I think a lot of it is to do with the constancy of my presence and despite my natural personality I'm incredibly quiet and patient during labours. I remind them when to ask questions which sometimes stops unnecessary interventions. I never make decisions for my clients. I am very adamant about that, but I do help (I think) them make informed decisions.

What qualities most needed? Patience. Love of people (it's not about the babies despite the fact that babies are born) and the ability not to put your own agenda on people. Just a few I think.

As to making a living... well yes it's possible. You may never be rich (unless you find some celebrity clients... still waiting on that phone to ring) but yes you can make a passable living from it.

If you want to chat further you can email me on lovelymarslady at aol dot com.

I love the job that I do and can't believe I was lucky enough to find it!

Thanks mars. I will drop you a line if you don't mind. At work right now though. Supposed to be sorting end of year accounts. Oh joy...