Help - Second birth after a first traumatic assisted vaginal birth

[Hopitihop]

Hi All,

My first birth was very traumatic. I was induced at 39+ weeks because of gestational diabetes, was in extreme pain when the contractions started, no doctor was around for an epidural, I was crying and begging them to get one and finally got it 4 hours later when on 5cm. Then, 6 hours later, when it was time to push, baby's heart rate dropped, the emergency button was pushed, the doctor said that the baby needs to be out in 5 min. I had a massive episiotomy, I lost almost 2lt of blood, and at this area I am still in pain 2 years later. Also, it was a ventuse delivery.

Now, I am pregnant to my second one and I have gestational diabetes again.

Has anyone else been in this situation again? I can't go through the same again and I know that I will have to be induced.

I just want the baby out the easiest, most predictable and uncomplicated way. Should I ask for an ELCS?

Has anyone else had an induction and uncomplicated, easy vaginal birth following a bad tear from a previous birth?

Please share your experiences!

Sorry 'birth' corrected to 'north'

Ventouse and episiotomy DC1
Ventouse DC2
Natural DC3 gestational diabetes

Tearing, incontinence, huge mistake
The worst was the natural one
If I could have my time again, elective
Am aware piper needs paying at some point and surgery means post-op discomfort but still think less trauma than what I went through

First birth, no GD but failed epidural, ventouse, episiotomy, forceps, 1.5L blood loss, retained placenta. I recovered fine physically from the above although had a minor prolapse which improved after about two years of physio/Pilates.

Second birth, elective C section.
Calm, restorative experience. I remember everything, I remember seeing my baby for the first time, it was so calm and quick. Recovery was very straightforward. I don’t get the whole ‘major abdominal surgery’ scaremongering. I felt so tired and traumatised for months after my first birth. I felt back to myself very quickly with the C section. Yes there’s a recovery time, but if my prolapse was made worse by a second birth there would be recovery time for that that I would feel much worse about.