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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Skin to skin. Yes or NO

77 replies

Naz2009 · 26/11/2021 01:57

Hi mums, what's your opinion in regards to skin to skin right after birth.
Should I have skin to skin right away once baby is born.
What if I chose not to do this right away will it be bad for baby?
There is a lot of positive for both baby and I on doing skin to skin right away. I've been reading online. But I want to know from mums, their first hand experience.

OP posts:

MinkyWinky · 08/12/2021 12:14

I had a c-section, so my husband held our baby (skin-to-skin) while they stitched me up. I did skin-to-skin when I was in recovery. It just felt right for her to be next to me.

DobbyTheHouseElk · 08/12/2021 12:16

It is a precious moment. But no one had told me what a newborn looked like. Purple wrinkly and covered in cream cheese and blood wasn’t what I’d imagined. I was so terrified of baby sliding off me as I was lying down for stitching.

EmpressCixi · 08/12/2021 12:22

I don’t think it matters so much right after birth. All they do is plop the naked baby on your naked deflated belly for a minute and then whisk them away to be assessed and cleaned up while you’re birthing the after birth and then potentially getting a tear or episiotomy stitched up.

The cuddling when you’re both cleaned up from birth and settled is much more important. Mine were also nicely alert and gripping my finger and nursing colostrum as well. To me that was more bonding than the skin to skin minute where it’s all exhausted you and exhausted baby both covered in blood and white goo.

user1483387154 · 08/12/2021 12:27

My son was born by c section 4 years ago and had to go straight to incubation. he is the most.cuddly loving child even though he had no skin to skin till i awoke from surgery

Roseandgeranium · 08/12/2021 12:48

I loved it with both of mine. It was exactly what I needed after an arduous first birth and a startlingly fast second birth. They both latched on very swiftly after being given to me which was great and I think helped to ensure breastfeeding was completely straightforward. But they also both pooed on me so if that would really bother you it’s something to prepare for!

Sickoffamilydrama · 08/12/2021 13:17

[quote elliejjtiny]@Sickoffamilydrama I had that primal urge too. When my youngest was born I remember trying to get up and go over to where he was being resuscitated because I NEEDED to hold him right that minute. Probably a good job I'd had a spinal and couldn't move as getting up and walking around with a massive hole in my tummy would have been a bit unwise [/quote]
Glad I'm not alone in that and yep probably not wise to wander around post C section until you are all closed up 🤣

Antiqueanniesmagiclanternshow · 08/12/2021 15:37

@laurenGame, you want the vernix to stay on the baby for a while because it helps protect their delicate skin as they adjust to the outside world.

laurenGame · 08/12/2021 23:15

@Antiqueanniesmagiclanternshow just googled Vernix (I'm first time pregnant so this is the unknown) - wow it has to stay on for a minimum of 6 hours! So baby will be covered in white stuff for so long! I don't know where I got it from that they get a quick shower rinse shortly after birth.

Antiqueanniesmagiclanternshow · 09/12/2021 00:02

It's amazing though isn't it? The more we discover about the relationship between mother and baby the more fascinating it is.

MovinOnUp · 09/12/2021 00:27

I asked for my babies to be dried and wrapped up before being given to me.
I am extremely squeamish and didn't want to take a chance of ruining our first cuddle with me throwing up. (Very real possibility)

MovinOnUp · 09/12/2021 00:28

Posted too soon.
It's had no adverse effect on our bonds and I'll do the same with the next one.

laurenGame · 09/12/2021 01:29

@MovinOnUp I'm v squeamish too 🙊 maybe it'll be different when it's my own baby
The thought of the vernix being left on has filled me with slight dread and I feel like a bad mother already 🤣
So much to learn!

Antiqueanniesmagiclanternshow · 09/12/2021 07:29

It's totally different with your own baby! Your hormones will take over and you'll be desperate to hold her!

elliejjtiny · 09/12/2021 14:24

@laurenGame I was really worried about this with ds1. When he was born I couldn't have cared less, although he was born in the birthing pool nearly 2 weeks overdue so the blood and vernix was fairly minimal (in total contrast to ds4 who was born by c-section 5 weeks early so was covered in blood and white gunk). Ds1 was also very considerate and waited until dh was holding him before pooing vast quantities of meconium over the towel he was wrapped in and dh's trousers .

Parker231 · 09/12/2021 14:31

I didn’t. DH got them dressed and gave the first bottle. Had no impact on the close bond we have. There is no right or wrong.

MrsPleasant · 09/12/2021 16:18

@Antiqueanniesmagiclanternshow

It's totally different with your own baby! Your hormones will take over and you'll be desperate to hold her!

This is categorically not the case for all new mums and the expectation that it is can be very distressing for those whose hormones do not "take over".

blossomkil · 09/12/2021 16:31

Skin to skin is a nice thing to do if you're well enough after the birth, and feel like you want to. If you or the baby need medical help you might not get the chance, and sometimes mum just feels too unwell to do it. This is totally fine too. Please don't listen to people telling you your baby won't love you or eat or whatever if you don't do skin to skin. It's just a cuddle.

Ozanj · 09/12/2021 16:33

It helped my milk to come in and helped my heart rate go down (I had severe tachycardia due to a severe pph). So from a medical perspective it’s worth it, but see how the birth goes and go with the flow on this one a bit.

TheHuntingOfTheSarky · 09/12/2021 16:40

Skin to skin yes definitely! I couldn't do this with either of my DDs (EMCS) and my husband did it instead. Years later I'm still jealous that he got the contact I felt was my right. Ridiculous but can't help it!

santasmuma · 09/12/2021 16:41

@Antiqueanniesmagiclanternshow

It's totally different with your own baby! Your hormones will take over and you'll be desperate to hold her!

One of mine was 3 hours old before I held them. Midwife kept trying but I was far too shocked by the speed and pain of the birth, and the loss of control of everything that I didn't feel I could safely hold them. I was shaking like an absolute leaf in a storm. My hormones were not doing anything wrong though; I think it's bad to suggest hormones will take over and make a woman behave in a certain way. My hormones wanted to protect my newborn and giving them to dad while I felt so bad was the best way for me to do this.

BoudecaBains · 09/12/2021 16:46

Makes absolutely no difference.

roarfeckingroarr · 09/12/2021 20:23

Why would you not?

StruggleStreet · 09/12/2021 20:34

Whilst I’m sure there are real benefits, I think skin to skin has become a bit like breastfeeding in that so much is made of how important it is and it creates a lot of guilt for mums who can’t or don’t want to.

I was shaking so much as a side effect from the spinal block that I couldn’t safely hold DD for the first couple of hours. I remember being really worried that it would mean we didn’t bond, two years on and our bond has always been great.

So, if you can and want to do skin to skin great, but don’t overthink it and don’t succumb to the guilt if it doesn’t happen.

StrongerOrWeaker · 09/12/2021 20:36

Hated it so much.

Nomoreusernames1244 · 09/12/2021 20:43

As with anything you aren’t going to know how you feel in the moment so keep an open mind. If you want skin to skin, ask, if not say no.

I had bad reactions to the anaesthetic during my sections so I asked them to give the baby to dh straight away. I was sick, shaky and felt like passing out, it was taking everything I had not to slide into unconciousness or vomit, or both.

So dh did the cleaning up, dressing, weighing etc then they were brought to me once on the ward.

It’s fine to do whichever you want.

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