Having a VBAC wobble .. can someone chat to me pls

[mrssunshinexxx]

I had my first daughter last year via emc although there wasn't anything traumatic going on I was just totally exhausted both physically and mentally after 26 hours of intense contractions for the most part 4 in 10 mins lasting a minute and she was back to back I had also lost my mum suddenly 6 weeks before so was in a v bad place mentally all in all it was a shit show but nothing actually wrong as such with me or baby. The recovery from EMC was quite frankly horrible I had infection after infection and really struggled with the 'don't do too much'advice. I'm due again in a couple of weeks and planning a vbac but I'm just having a wobble I think because it's creeping closer. I know everyone says an elective is different to an emergency but I don't have support other than my husband and he would have Max 2 weeks off so the idea of having a 16month old that I can't/ shouldn't lift in to cot , bath, highchair or drive is just a no no. Basically I need someone to give me a kick up the arse and tell me there's a chance I can have a vaginal birth that's not horrifically long or ends in emc

Thanks @creamandberries I have some good friends but they all either have young babies themselves or are pregnant and are working full time I don't want to be a burden. It's a risk isn't it just have to hope I have a smooth time becagse if I do it will definitely be the right option 🤞

@creamandberries also we definitely want more children so I am factoring that into my birth choice x

I had my first by emcs and my second I had a vbac. I would hands down opt for a vb every time now I've been able to compare the 2, I honestly don't know how I would have coped if I'd needed a second cs and the recovery was as long as my first one, I was in bits and just pretty broken for a good 4-5 weeks, compared to not even a day with my vbac, just a bit tender, but I could drive and do all those kinds of things. I enjoyed those early newborn days with DD2 much more than I did with DD1 I know everyone's experiences are different and there are a lot of different factors that go into it but I was dreading the thought of needing another cs and having to look after 2 kids

Sounds so positive @Survivingmy3yearold 8 hope I get the same experience desperately x

My first was born by emergency CS after 40 hours of Labor. I had a vbac with my second. My DS almost died in the first one, I almost died in the second one and had a huge number of stitches for tears. The recovery was far worse with the VBAC. If I had it to do all over again I would do an elective C-section for both.

So sorry that sounds equally traumatic it's just so so so unpredictable isn't it @SofiaAmes

I'm sorry to be alarmist, but nobody really properly discussed the real options and risks with me and were rude and dismissive when I questioned the risks. And even more problematic, there were lots of options given to me that were totally unrealistic (like birth plans that no one would even look at, birth pools that had no water pressure so didn't fill up, pain relief options that couldn't be delivered because they were completely understaffed.....I waited 5 hours for the epidural for the EMERGENCY CS and then another 5 hours for the surgeon for the EMERGENCY CS....all of this at St.Mary's in London.)

I'm really sorry you had such a negative experience @SofiaAmes all women should have access to fantastic maternity care and postnatal. I cannot fault my local hospital but it's very small so I imagine that's why

@jubbablub anything happening with you x

[quote mrssunshinexxx]@jubbablub anything happening with you x[/quote]
Hey. Yeah. So went for induction booking appointment and BP was slightly elevated and some protein in urine. Dr was adamant a sweep was needed. Was 1cm dialated, which means things are on the way. Felt a bit railroaded into the sweep tbh. Then I had to go to one of the main maternity hospitals for a blood pressure study. Anyway, got my gentle birth app on had loads to drink and my BP calmed down to very normal levels and no protein in urine. Have an induction booked for Saturday, but have had some cramping this evening, so hoping things will progress well on their own.

Should add, it wasn’t my usual consultant and I’m a bit annoyed I didn’t have the blood pressure screening/assessment first.

@jubbablub that sounds annoying but good that you got BP down hope things have progressed overnight for you pls come back and let us know x

For anyone interested got to 10cm and pushing and her heart rate went into distress transpires the cord was round her neck twice and my scar was paper thin so the right decision was made but feeling very disappointed I went through all that to end with major surgery again and went into life with a new born having been through both labours and not slept for 40 Hours just totally wrecked to begin with . Been strongly advised next pregnancy should be elective which I will not ignore but will be gutted to have another caesarean recovery although I know an elective would be a little easier than

Congratulations on the birth of your DD and I think you're a very brave lady to already be thinking about a third
It's a shame things didn't go quite how you would've liked but it sounds like the decisions around your care were good ones. Fingers crossed you have an easy recovery.

Ha brave or stupid @ArtfulScreamer

Congratulations @mrssunshinexxx well done for trying, you gave it your best shot by the sounds of it. Hope you and baby are doing well x

@mrssunshinexxx

Congratulations! Sorry to hear it didn’t go as you would ideally have liked but sounds like it was the only safe option for you and your baby. And at least you don’t have any regrets about not trying.

Thanks @Chasingaftermidnight @neverornow defo no regrets already thinking about baby no3!

Hi,
I know it's been a while mrsunshinexxx but I am currently pregnant and expecting my second and I had an emergency c section in Sep 2021. I am due Dec 22 so will be 15 months apart from first c section to hopefully vbac. I am so nervous they will say no and really want a vbac as I dont want a 15 month and not being able to carry him as recovery was awful. Any tips and did you get your vbac?

I had a successful VBAC after a horrible CS. My first child was 2y3m when I had my second birth. I didn't lift the toddler for the first 2 weeks as I had DH at the time but by the end of week 2 I was climbing around soft play with him and picking him up over the bits of soft play he was too little to manage alone, lifting him in and out of car seat, trolley, pushchair etc. My oldest is 98th percentile for height and weight. I stayed very active at the end of this pregnancy and that helped a lot. The episiotomy was still a bit sore for about 4 weeks but that was the only lasting pain and it's completely gone now. That was a 18 hour back-to-back labour with pitocin drip in the last 6 hours and failed epidural, and ultimately an episiotomy for her huge head lol. The pain was horrendous for the first couple of days and I couldn't walk out of the hospital very easily, but I rested as much as poss for about 5 days and then it settled right down and I coped with that a lot better than with the lingering pain/activity restrictions from my CS. 6 weeks post birth DH left to work abroad so it's definitely doable. But VBACs are unpredictable and a ELCS offers the idea of being in control during the actual birth so you have to go with what you feel is right for you.

@SSB22 contact Birthrights if you're not being supported to have a VBAC and if it's medically safe for you to have one. You have a right (in the UK and in Ireland) to ask for a different consultant/hospital if yours is unwilling to let you have TOL (trial of labour). Can you tell I had issues getting a VBAC lol? My friend had a VBAC 16 months after her first EMCS so it's definitely possible but it probably depends on the reason you had a CS and how well healed your scar is (and how your consultant feels).

Thank you @PeekabooAtheZoo . It will be 15 months between births so I know they will be apprehensive. And lol I couldn't tell you had issues 🤣 but thank you will defo follow that route if need be but hopefully I won't need to. So nervous and can't enjoy this pregnancy at all because I'm so scared they will make me have another section 😩. Any questions to ask at my first appointment? Thank you

@SSB22 hi x my response Is a few posts down and that's the tame birth story it was quite scary but a mistake was made my a midwife that I believe cost me my section . I don't regret going for a vbac and will do so again if we are lucky enough to have a third x

To add @SSB22 you have a Legal right to be supported for a vbac so take no nonsense of anyone !