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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Advice on how to deal with having a long and traumatic labour and delivery

11 replies

yelnif · 18/10/2021 22:33

Hello!
I had my gorgeous baby girl in November last year. i started having some mild contractions which were 10 mins apart throughout Friday night, Sat Night and Sunday night but they stopped during the day... i went in for a sweep on Monday and i made the lady stop as it was too painful and the midwive mentioned babys head was in a funny position and could slip back to back. i was then induced on monday evening (9days OD then) and contractions had started back again at that point, my waters broke 3am tuesday and intense contractions started properly within 30 seconds. All i remember is being on all 4s on the bed resting on the amazing yoga style ball and there being a few Drs in the room talking about my heartbeat/pulse acting up... at a few occassions it was going upwards of 230 and other points going back down to 40! i remained at 5cms for hours and hours and finally they decided i should have an epidural to rest my body and see if the vitals could stabilise. i could still feel the back pain with each contraction with the epidural in ( she slipped back to back when the waters broke ) and after 18 hours of labour, 3 hours of pushing, a full episiotomy and forceps she arrived at 7pm! they discovered after a weeks stay in hospital that i have some eptopics which means my heart skips a beat and then tries to catchup again by doing some extra fast ones and when the body is in stressfull labour it intensifies and does it no good as you can imagine. However, i was relaxed throughout the whole ordeal and never remember being scared, just praying and praying for my husband watching it all as many people flooded round me and tried to bring me back to conciousness 3 times! i was only 22.... should i dread my future pregnancies? has anyone had a similar story and gone on for another? i would love to hear your stories!!

OP posts:
choosername1234 · 18/10/2021 22:43

Have a Caesarian, fully planned and with experts on standby just in case

Pinkplums · 18/10/2021 23:21

Aside from the heart issues my first labour was very similar. Well overdue, long and slow start, got stuck halfway, had epidural to recover a bit, 3hrs of pushing (26hrs total) I didn’t have forceps but baby was back to back too.

My 2nd labour was also very overdue but wasn’t back to back, I went in early (because I had an induction booked in but I was already in labour) she was born 6hrs later (was in the pool and using gas and air) with only 14mins of pushing. Much much easier 2nd time around!

Immaback · 21/10/2021 23:52

Besides the heart issues this was similar to mine. 18 hours, baby back to back (but turned thankfully) no epidural , 3 hours of pushing and third degree tears. Very very long physical recovery for me as well as a PTSD diagnoses a year after the birth (I didn’t know it was abnormal to have flashbacks and relive the birth every day)
2.5 years later had a wonderful , uneventful planned c section. Couldn’t recommend more !

PanicBuyingSprouts · 22/10/2021 19:04

Definitely go for a planned c-section Thanks

Bobojangles · 22/10/2021 19:10

I had a horrific 1st labour (3 days ending in an emergency trip to threatre for a massive PPH, very long recovery afterwards)

I opted for an ELCS for no 2 which was agreed to no problem - instead I had a 1 he 30 min vaginal delivery 3 weeks early with just a few stitches!

No 3 was born in about 30mins, standing up with no pain relief and not even a graze. I was back home in a few hours

You really.csmt tell what is gonna happen in the future 🤷‍♀️ but I have found memories of my most recent labour and it was very healing

Flittingaboutagain · 22/10/2021 19:17

Hi OP how awful. I'm glad you and baby were OK.

I really recommend you have a look at the birth trauma association website and forum. You might also benefit from a debrief at the hospital to discuss what happened and why, and what could be done differently in future.

Peach01 · 22/10/2021 20:09

I had a terrible experience the first time. I can't speak about it without crying. The recovery was awful.

Contact your hospital to speak to someone from birth psychology, it really helps.
I'm pregnant again and found the midwives extremely understanding about everything that happened first time round. I've just signed my consent form for an elective c section.

Cappuccino17 · 25/10/2021 00:09

Hiya my first labour was back to back contractions followed by a traumatic delivery haemorrhage and kiwi delivery I had tons of stitches. I remember I couldn't rest due to the back to back so was just sat on the loo as I couldn't sit on a chair or the bed. Was just knackered.
The second one I had no contractions in my back at all. It was all front based. I could rest I between my contractions on the bed, the car ride was much more comfortable on the way to the hospital as I could actually sit. I laid on the bed. I never knew 2 labours could feel so different! The delivery was similar but I never had PPH but I had a ventouse delivery. A much better experience second time. The length of time was similar tho to my previous and not faster. I was told second time deliveries are much faster. Everyone's body is different I guess!

Cappuccino17 · 25/10/2021 00:15

Like urself I was traumatised after my first experience and now I wish I did get counselling in that time.

Floralnomad · 25/10/2021 00:17

I agree with other posters about having a section next time , that’s what I did . I had a terrible 1st pregnancy , miscarried a twin ,HG and lots of issues with remaining baby . Then had a hugely difficult labour , PPH , baby who was 10lb + taken off to SCBU and then to top it off I fainted in the loo about 5 hours after the birth and bashed my head quite badly on the basin . I ended up staying in for 4 days having blood transfusions . Second time I still had HG for 80% of the pregnancy but had a non eventful section , out of hospital in 2 days and out and about as normal within a fortnight .

Marelle · 25/10/2021 00:26

This is why I chose not to have another baby. I suffered terrible trauma and I couldn’t cope with it a second time.

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