Natural birth or C Section . Advice please !

[Tigersparklespink]

I will try to keep this brief . Please be kind .
I am 31 and about to give birth for the first time . I am 35 weeks pregnant. I am classed as a low risk pregnancy . I have suffered mental health issues and received great support . I think this will be my online pregnancy ( however no one can say for sure but I imagine I won’t be able to cope again )

The baby was breach until yesterday when my midwife said she “ thinks the baby has moved but can’t be sure . I have a scan booked for next week to check .

The issue is I had told myself as the baby is breach I will have an Elective Section . Now reality is that baby might not be . So my midwife asked me - what would you like to do about birth ? She said she happy to fully support my choice for a planned section .

Im just so confused . I have read so much on both . I feel I would be so much calmer knowing I was booked for a selection at 39 weeks and knowing that was the plan . However , I am well aware a c section is major surgery and can have potential for infection and a really hard and sore recovery . It is not an easy option .

I feel extremely scared to attempt to give birth , I’m scared I’ll be over due and then have to be induced . I am also really worried about tearing and having a traumatic birth .

I am also under the impression it is best to pick a section as apprised to just try and give birth and if I can cope then have an emergency section . So I don’t think it’s right to say - I will try natural birth and see how it goes . I don’t know ????

I’m not sure if I have just terrified myself with fear and I need to be brave and just go for the natural birth . I just can’t help feel this is not what I want to do . But I’m confused !

I realise no one can predict the future. I have ordered a book on hypnobirthing and a positive birth book to try and prepare myself and then make an informed choice .

Does anyone have any advise ?

I am also under the impression it is best to pick a planned section as apposed to just try and give birth and if I cant cope then have an emergency section .

Excuse my typos !

Sending lots of encouragement your way! You are doing great & it's great your provider is so open to letting you choose what you feel best - that's a sign that you're in good hands.

If I were you I would plan for a natural birth due to the quicker recovery time (although that is not guaranteed always remember but often more likely). Do lots of research on different stages of labour & breathing techniques, pain relief so that you feel more in control and know what is happening.

Try your best to "go with the flow" as it may be that you need a C-Section still, so it's good to be mentally prepared for both.

Not sure how useful that is, but sending lots of hugs and encouragement your way! You can do it!

First things first! Find out from scan whether baby is breech or not then take it from there. Have you been referred for a psychology appointment to perhaps help with your anxiety surrounding a natural birth? Your midwife sounds like she will support you whatever you decide. But always remember that sometimes your body has the ability to surprise you and you can surprise yourself. Good luck!

I would encourage C section to anyone who asks. Wish I could go back in time and have c sections, I've been left with so much vaginal and pelvic floor damage. It's just not worth it.

A phrase from your post stuck out op. You called giving birth naturally "brave"

I'm not sure that's helpful tbh. As you say both methods have pitfalls. No medals for doing one over the other so take bravery out of it.

Maybe think about the best and worst side of each option and what you'd prefer then. Plus likelihood of each going smoothly.

Or think what you'd chose over all else. Do you value certainty over recovery time, for instance.

Good luck OP! Whatever option you chose I hope it goes really well

I don't know anyone who has had long term complications from a c section. I know quite a few who had medium and long term complications from a vaginal birth.

With a section there will be 6 weeks recovery but you know that in advance and can plan for it.

Agree, don't make a decision until after the scan. If baby hasn't turned then there's no change of plan.

I'd go for a natural birth if you can. I've had two lovely births and for me a c section would have been an unnecessary intervention.

I had a 3rd degree tear with my eldest, but easy to stitch up and healed well. It's less stitches that I'd have had if I'd had a section.

I didn't tear at all with my second, even though so was bigger. Both were over 9lbs.

My labours were quick - 6 hrs for DC1 and 3 for DC2. I was out of hospital so quickly with both. I only stayed overnight with my first because he was born at 9:30pm. They didn't want to send us home at 11pm lol. I didn't have to spend a night on the labour ward. I'm told those places aren't nice and with a c section you'll have to stay in one night.

As for long term effects - none. I can bounce on a trampoline all day without wetting myself. My friend who's only had c sections can't do that. Those issues come from pregnancy not birth.

I have no prolapses or major birth injuries. I didn't have a traumatic birth. I don't have any regrets.

I'm not saying a c section is bad - it's not. If you need one it's great. But vaginal birth isn't always a shit show. It isn't always the path to long term issues. It isn't always traumatic.

@HungryHippo11

I don't know anyone who has had long term complications from a c section. I know quite a few who had medium and long term complications from a vaginal birth.

With a section there will be 6 weeks recovery but you know that in advance and can plan for it.

I do know people with issues resulting from their c sections. Some had bad infections in their incisions

There's no right or wrong answer, only what's right for you. I've had two completely easy emcs with no problems, quick recoveries after one night in hospital each time. DH found a vasectomy more traumatic. But I know people who've had difficult elective CS and difficult and easy natural deliveries. There's no guarantee in any direction.

I'd do plenty of research and then speak to your midwife about what you think is right for you.

You can't control the specifics as that's down to luck but the things that will make a difference and you can exercise control over are things like the support you have in place and how and why you will make decisions on the day. I'd explore that with the medical professionals and family you have around you so that you're choosing the path which suits you.

@HungryHippo11 I have long term complications from my section 2 years ago, which I had due to baby being beech.
I have been left with abdominal adhesions which basically feels like your stomach is constantly bruised. I can't lean on anything, wear tight trousers around my waist etc. Stretching hurts, as does laying on my front in certain positions. It also affects sex.
The only fix is further abdominal surgery, which won't be happening any time soon due to COVID.
There is also a chance that the surgery to correct it will leave me with new adhesions so I could have this for life.

I've had two natural births and a planned section 9 weeks ago as baby was a big size (born 11lbs 2oz 😲)

There are pros and cons to both but if I had to choose I would go for a natural birth as the recovery is so much easier.

That being said I had absolutely no problems or any pain after the section. The key thing is to move slowly and take regular painkillers.

Whatever you decide will be right for you.

I’m quite an anxious person anyway but my number one fear on earth has always been giving birth ‘naturally’. Between the fact you have no idea when it’s going to happen then the uncontrolled nature of the whole thing and the small issue of the pain and potential for emergency buzzers, forceps, emergency c-section etc it just wasn’t the route I was willing to go down at all. You don’t sound like you’re 100% set one way or another so I wouldn’t want to put you off trying for a natural birth if that’s what you ideally want. I think I was just missing that inbuilt desire to push a baby out your vagina that most women seem to be born with 🙈

I was one million per cent sure I wanted a c-section from the first appointment and made sure every health professional I spoke to knew that was the case 😂 I had it all booked by 29 weeks, found out the date at 34 weeks and it did wonders for my anxious nature. I was obviously still worried about going into labour early and was continually told by people that I would (a very helpful thing to say to someone who’s worried her whole life about going into labour 🙄). Anyway, I didn’t and I made it to my section date. It was the most amazing day of my life from start to finish 😊 I couldn’t recommend it enough if they came with some sort of guarantee that you get it like that. I feel so lucky that after the years of worrying I’ve done, mine went as smoothly as it did. I turned up at 10am, a couple of hours getting ready and having a few basic checks done, signing forms and speaking to the theatre staff then it was time to go. I walked through to theatre with the nurse, sat up on the bed, got a cannula in my hand which was the worst bit and was only a bit of a nip then had the spinal put in (which I thought would be the worst bit but was actually NOTHING). Was still fully in control of my legs and lay myself down on the bed, waited a few minutes while I very gradually felt pins and needles come on in my legs and I went numb. The screen went up, I didn’t even know they’d started the op then there was max 10 seconds of pushing down on me and in under 2 minutes from the screen going up it went back down and there was my baby! I was in disbelief it could be so, dare I say it, easy. I was stitched up in 20 minutes and as they wheeled me back round to recovery with my baby I was on cloud 9 and just thought why would anyone ever give birth any way that’s not that?! I couldn’t believe how amazing it was! So quick, so calm and so painless!

This obviously isn’t how everyone’s c-section experience goes and it is major surgery with risks etc but I just absolutely loved it. My recovery has been great too and I felt virtually normal by 2 weeks later, was out a walk with the pram by 1 week.

Do your research on both, no one can tell you which way is best, only you can decide that but I was very pleased with my decision 😊 good luck whatever you choose

If you do decide on a natural birth and you go over the date and have to be induced - I’d recommend looking into how likely it is to be successful. I was stupid and just went along with pessaries and balloons when my case had a low chance of success. Being induced was worse than the c section.

Obviously we’re all biased from our experiences. I had an emergency c-section and I’m much more pro c-section than I was before. If I have another it will be by elective c-section. There are good and bad points about both.

I can bounce on a trampoline all day without wetting myself. My friend who's only had c sections can't do that. Those issues come from pregnancy not birth

They can come from both pregnancy and birth. Women who have c sections can have issues but vaginal births do have a higher rates. But there are treatments for it and other positives to vaginal deliveries.

(Under causes: “pregnancy and vaginal birth”
www.nhs.uk/conditions/urinary-incontinence/)

I understand completely where you're coming from OP. My DS is 4 weeks old and I faced the same fears when I had him. He was breech for a long time and I'd almost resigned myself to the fact that I was going to have a section. (I have had three previous vaginal births)

Due to me convincing myself that's how it would be, I developed this terrible fear of giving birth, even though I'd already done it three times. I was terrified of it going wrong, being left damaged, being in uncontrollable pain, having tears and stitches, needing induction, going overdue, a general feeling of being out of control due to not having a specific date to work towards. I was also estimated to have a big baby on board and I'd scared myself with stories of shoulder distocia.

My consultant and midwife and all midwives on the triage suite told me that I was perfectly capable of labour and that I was doubting myself unnecessarily.

As it happens, I decided to brave it and give it a go. I went overdue by a week. Ended up needing induction as baby was growing exponentially. I had a quick labour but a large PPH and a 2nd degree tear. I was back on my feet pretty quickly and able to do everything at home once I'd been discharged. DS was 10lb 7oz!

In hindsight, I'm glad I didn't have the section. I wouldn't have wanted the slower longer recovery and the lack of driving. I bounced back, as most women do after vaginal deliveries. Even though I ended up with the things I didn't want, it really wasn't that horrific. As soon as the baby is born it all seemed irrelevant to me.

I'm just rambling now but just wanted to say don't doubt your body. Try and get rid of the fear, it's really not that bad.

This is a decision that only you can make. Just keep asking questions until you are satisfied with your decision. My eldest was breach until 2 weeks before I gave birth. He arrived at 42 weeks. I did hypnobirthing and that really helped me. I also did extra Kegels when pregnant. Yes - I do them twice a day. Have done so from age 14. I (well I had my husband do it :-)) did perineal massage from 32 weeks. This I believed helped massively. No tears with either of my births. I can only advise what worked for me and to add that mindset is a big factor. Positive mental attitude will really help.

Just go with your gut. Neither way is a walk in the park. One way is completely out of anyone's control and could be straightforward or very complex, and it may be that you have no issues or that you end up with incontinence or prolapse (my biggest fear). The other way is major surgery but more controllable, with a slightly increased risk of death (still much lower than dying in a car) and a reduced risk of incontinence and prolapse - yes, pregnancy can do a number on your pelvic floor but you didn't cause even more damage by pushing a baby through the pelvic floor. Vaginal births can have really quick recovery times but it is worth noting this is not guaranteed. C-sections can have longer recovery times but again, this is not a given. I would do your own research into the pros and cons for both. I did and although I'm scared of surgery, I am petrified of the complete gamble a vaginal birth would be and I am more prepared to accept the risks of a c-section than a vagjnal birth. You'll know in your gut which one is for you.

It's impossible for anyone to advise as it is so personal to you. We can only share our experiences. I've had an EMCS and a VBAC. I would definitely opt for a section. Recovery was faster and far less painful with my EMCS. I was pretty much back to normal after a fortnight. My VBAC was a forceps delivery. It left me with a prolapse and an anal fissure which was excruciating. I think you need to take advice from your consultant/midwife and go with your gut reaction.

Thank you everyone . I am so grateful .
I have a scan on Thursday to see if the baby is still breach . If he is not , I am still going to follow my gut and opt for the c section which is booked for 39 weeks. Who knows - he may even turn early and it all changes !
Thank you to all .
Best wishes x

He may even turn up early *

I had my c section as baby was still breach . I was blown away . It was calm , quick and I was up
And showered and moving ( gently) 24 hours later.

I have had minimum bleeding and pain . I am blown away by Kent NHS.

That’s great news OP. I had a c section last month for the same reason- I too was really surprised at how easy my recovery was- out the next day- we went for a (gentle!) walk in the local park with the buggy on day 2! I was expecting to be bed bound. The baby had the scan to check his hips on Monday and all fine with that.

Congrats on your new baby x

Oh, great news, congratulations!

Fantastic too that you had good care.

I had an elective CS. Never even considered a vaginal birth from the outset, it was just not something I ever wanted to do. It was great, no pain at any stage, was home in 3 days and absolutely fine, up and about. 12 years later can't even see the scar!

Oh I see you had the baby, congratulations!