Petrified of second labour.. any positive stories?

[beholdthecreation]

I'm 25 weeks with my second baby and I'm absolutely petrified at the thought of labour again. As in I'm crying all the time and waking in the night thinking about it. My first was 24 hours and ended in forceps, I had gas and air and pethdine. I also hate vomiting so I'm terrified I won't be so lucky not to this time.

ANY positive stories about seconds births would be greatly appreciated..

My first was 12 hours, had the drip, episiotomy and forceps. Took about 2 months to feel normal again.
Second labour was 3 hours from water breaking to birth, gas and air only and felt great the day after.

No two births are the same.

I had a friend who had a similar experience to you. She was really, really traumatised by the birth.

She asked for a C section at one of her antenatal appointments. They allowed her to have one without too many questions asked.

Would you be interested in a C section? I had an emergency section after screaming my head off for hours trying to give birth. It was absolute bliss.

Sorry., that should have said that she asked for a C section when she was pregnant with her 2nd!

My first ended with me being in itu a week.
My second was a breeze compared twin pregnancy so due to this and previous experience I had an induced labour at 36 weeks. Gas and air only, twins both born naturally after 8 hours.
Every birth is different, I think second time your more aware of your body and I was also more aware of what I would and wouldn't want, but also more willing to be flexible as labour progressed.
Maybe good idea to talk to your midwife regarding your worries so that you can look at solutions.

My first labour was 16 hrs, my second one was 5 hrs.

My first was very like yours. Took me months to recover and i had pnd.

When I was pregnant with my second I asked for an c section, they asked me to consider induction at 39 weeks (first was 42 weeks and 10ln 1 oz baby who h cause a lot of the issues). After lots of thought and conversations with others I accepted this. I insisted on epidural before drip and stick to my plan. Midwives obviously knew my history as they accepted what I wanted. DD was born 8 hours later in 3 pushes and it was love at first sight. Only needed a few stitches. Went home next day and felt great after.

I had a birth debrief when pregnant with DD (no 2) and this helped me process 1st birth again (already had a debrief) and understand again what happened a first time to inform my second birth.

My second birth was very easy, she obviously couldn't wait to get out!

I know it's really tough not to worry, but I'll share my positive experience with you!

My first was 27 hours, unmedicated for the first 20, I got an epidural because I was passing out in between contractions and ended up having back to back contractions after they broke my waters, it was awful, I was in a pool for a good chunk of this and always wonder why I was allowed to stay in there for so long but I was honestly so out of it because of the pain, my husband was holding me up out of the water! After epidural I got rest but he was stuck and when it was time to push he just wasn't coming out; multiple doctors nurses in there basically shouting that I had to get him out within 5 minutes or I'd have a c section, I'd been awake for 30+ hours by this point, eventually he was pulled out with forceps, I tore badly and was in pain for weeks after. Baby all completely fine!

Second labour I started having contractions about 5 pm but not bad, by 7 they were more painful but I had a bath (home alone with 2 year old playing with ducks in the bath while I was in there, he was out the bath!) my mum got there to look after son about 8.30, we got to hospital about 8.40 and he was born within 10 mins! We were home by 10.30, it was an entirely different experience. No tearing, a few days later I felt pretty much 100% normal.

Try not to let previous experience reflect on what will happen, it won't be the same again

Because you asked: my first birth was straightforward but agonisingly painful. I was dreading my second birth. As it happens, It wasn’t that painful at all and was a very positive experience. I didn’t vomit the second time either.

I hope reading these posts makes you feel a bit better.

My first I was induced, had 36 hr labour, only oramorph as pain relief as no bed available in delivery suite and no time for epidural as I was 10cm dilated by the time they examined me. Ended in being rushed to theatre, spinal block and forceps. Spent 5 days in hospital.

DD2 I was overdue but went into labour naturally, I had an 8 hr labour, got to have gas and air straight away and epidural soon after. Straightforward delivery and felt fine afterwards, walking around a few hours later etc. Home the next day.

My first was very long, exhausting and I ended up with interventions I hadn't wanted.

My second I was out of hospital and on my way home within 4 hours of the birth.
It is likely that your second labour will be easier than your first OP. Is there any way you can get some help to process your first labour so that it isn't preying on your mind?

Can’t help as I’m only on my first baby and he’s not here yet 🙈 I have all of these fears and symptoms of anxiety as you describe just at the thought of a natural birth, always have done for some reason! I’ve asked for a c-section for that reason and it’s been granted with very little hassle. The midwifes weren’t overly helpful in referring me but as soon as I spoke to a consultant she agreed to it without any dramas. Not sure if that’s something you’d prefer or if you want to go the natural route? If you want a positive birth story watch Kate Murnane on YouTube, her two birth stories sound like the quickest easiest things ever! X