3rd degree tear, tell me it WILL get better!

[muppetgirl]

I had my little boy last monday (5th) and had a forceps delivery without an episiotomy. Consequently I tore from vagina to anus. The midwives have said the sewing is 'a good job' and I was beginning to feel better and even managed a few pelvic floors last week.

This week things are feeling a little strange - I need to run to the loo when I need a poo (not very often but still scary) and I am worried what to do when I am out...
I don't seem to be getting a full bladder signal but feel I need to go to the loo constantly. I am being treated for a UTI with antibiotics and the burning has gone but the 'I need the loo now even though I haven't got a full bladder' is still there.

I also feel like my whole insides are resting on my bits and this is VERY uncomfortable.

When I was being sewn (by the consultant) up I was told I would have a consultants' app in 6 weeks to check all was well, then I was told by another consultant it would be 12 weeks and then a midwife sister said on discharge I wouldn't be seen at all.

My questions

1. Will my bits ever feel normal again?
2. How long before they do??
3. Were you seen by a consultant to check all was well after your tear?

1. Yes
2. It didn't take that long. A month maybe?
3. Yes, I think it was 10 weeks. I had a delightful ultrasound scan and was pronounced fit for further vaginal deliveries. I didn't take home any photos from this particular u/s scan

Hi muppetgirl - firstly huge congratulations on the arrival of you ds!

Your tear sounds very much like mine and I had that running to the loo and couldn't stand for more than 10 mins as everything weighed so heavily on my pelvic floor. I think it was about 8 weeks until things were fine again - I remember bursting into tears at my 6 week check when the gp said I might need an operation if things didn't get better within another 6 weeks but thankfully they did.

It is horrible but it will get better - I would advise doing your pelvic floor exercises almost constantly and not putting yourself in a situation when you could have an embarrassing accident - i think I pushed myself to do too much too soon and that really stressed me out. I know 8 weeks sounds like a long time but it will get better

Congratulations Muppetgirl.
I had a 3rd degree with my dd1, and had to rush to the loo for the first couple of weeks (especially in the hospital where they insisted on me having Lactulose by the barrel load, things were much much better when I refused to have any more).
I found putting salt in the bath and the feme pads that you put in the fridge and then wear like sanitary towels really helpful with soreness.
I was checked out at 6 weeks by the consultant, but I felt back to normal before that (obviously everyone is different).
I am happy to say that 14 months after my tear I went on to have dd2, a much shorter labour and only a tiny tear, so things can get back into shape pretty quicky!
I have several friends who had smaller tears than me who took a lot longer to recover, I think because they were sewn up in a hurry, whereas I went to theatre and they took time to do a good job.
Good luck with the healing!

I had a 3rd degree tear and it took about 3 months to heal, 4-5months for the urge incontinence to disappear & probably about 12m all told to regain the same 'shape' as before.

Pelvic floors are important to regaining control.

I had a 2nd baby 2 yrs after the 1st & no problems although I was offered an elective section because of the urge incontinence/ tearing.

Thanks all,
This has really helped as I was feeling very much on my own. I don't want anymore children, 1st 9lb 1oz -ventouse, second 9 15 1/2 oz -forceps, god knows how big the thrid would be!!! (And I'm 5" 2 btw) I just hate the 'it's all going to fall out my vag' feeling. Will keep doing the pelvic floors....

Hi muppetgirl. I had failed ventouse and forceps with DD and a third degree tear. It sounds like yours is normal and healing very well to me. It is incredibly uncomfortable and scary, yes. I remember reading in one of the pregnancy books - what to expect? maybe? - that you might feel 'some discomfort' after a vaginal delivery and being slightly irked by the inaccuracy to say the least .

I had actual incontinence with mine so ended up having special ultrasounds (lets not go there!) and loads of physio (do your pelvic floor exercises as much as you can, even though it will feel weird for a while - fast then s l o w then fast!) - but after about six months I was/am completely fine.

Almost put me off having another baby, but now 7wks pg .

IT WILL GET BETTER!

Congratulations to you, btw - and respect. (DD was 9lb 6oz and I thought THAT was big!!)

1. Yes
2. 4 weeks to feel much better. 8 weeks to feel up to sex.
3. No, told I would get an appointment but forgot to chase it up. I recommend the feme pads to.