pregnancy and birth

[racheljones22]

Hi,
I am an A level student and I am doing an EPQ on the importance of informed consent and empowerment in both pregnancy and birth. I would therefore like to use the experiences of women who are pregnant or who have been pregnant in addition to women who have given birth previously as I aim to study at university to become a midwife.
It would be really helpful if you can answer these questions;
Are you pregnant currently or have you been pregnant in the last 5 years?
Did you make a birth plan? What were your main preferences? Were they supported?
Were you aware of your choices in both pregnancy and birth?
What were you told about pregnancy and birth before? Did you do any research when you were pregnant about birth?
Would you change anything now? Why?
What were your experiences of birth?

Thanks,
Rachel

Are you pregnant currently or have you been pregnant in the last 5 years?
Yes, currently pregnant with 2nd baby. First baby is almost a year and a half years old.

Did you make a birth plan? Yes
What were your main preferences? Waterbirth but didn’t get it with my first.
Were they supported? Yes but first didn’t go to plan.
Were you aware of your choices in both pregnancy and birth? I was aware you could choose to give birth in the birth centre or delivery suite but not sure why they didn’t put me in the birth centre (where I wanted to be)

What were you told about pregnancy and birth before? Did you do any research when you were pregnant about birth?
Told by who? I’ve heard loads of different things from experienced mums. I did do some research while pregnant about birth.

Would you change anything now? Why?
They put me on the hormone drip, and had to be induced. If I knew the contractions were going to be more painful than natural contractions (as I’ve heard), I would’ve been on the epidural sooner.
What were your experiences of birth?
I was always scared of the thought of giving birth, my first birth didn’t make it any better. I had a long labour and felt like pushing the baby out was very difficult and long.
Recovering from an episiotomy was a bit scary as I didn’t want to rip the stitches if I wanted to do a #2 even though they said it was fine. It was uncomfortable recovering with stitches and I was always scared it could get infected.

I haven’t had baby yet so can’t really comment but I think Milli Hills book ‘give birth like a feminist’ would be really useful for you. The majority of it is about the history of childbirth and how the approach to things like consent varies around the world. It’s also full of references so would point you in the direction of key case law and papers etc. In the area you’re interested in

Are you pregnant currently or have you been pregnant in the last 5 years?
I have a 1 year old and I am currently 17+3 with second baby.

Did you make a birth plan? What were your main preferences? Were they supported?
No, I was very asked about a birth plan but I stated that I wanted a natural birth on an MLU, no instrumental intervention unless it was life or death situation. They were absolutely supported, I was lucky enough to go into labour naturally and was a low risk pregnancy.

Were you aware of your choices in both pregnancy and birth?
Absolutely.

What were you told about pregnancy and birth before? Did you do any research when you were pregnant about birth?
I did a lot of my own research online about the actual act of giving birth but I pretty much went with the flow.

Would you change anything now? Why?
I would listen to my body more during the pushing stage. I pushed at times when I shouldn't have and subsequently had 2nd degree internal tearing. I think I could go as far as saying that I could have avoided such tearing if I had let my body take over a bit more.

What were your experiences of birth?
Mind blowing. It was the single most incredible thing I have ever done. I'm opting for a homebirth this time as I feel that being in the comfort of my own home will lead to a much more positive experience this time. I also much prefer the idea of total 1 to 1 time with the midwife.

Hope that helps :)

Thank you all so much! I have read Give birth like a feminist already :)

I would also like to know if the coronavirus affected any of your choices or if it had a significant impact on your experience. Thank you so much 😁

@racheljones22 I had my DD the day we went into the first national lockdown, but at this time there were no restrictions within the hospital so my partner could stay with me until I was discharged (we had our own private room on the MLU)
This time, I have had to go to all of my appointments thus far alone. However, now restrictions are easing they have told me my partner can be present at my 20 week scan and any midwife appointments I have going forward.

Are you pregnant currently or have you been pregnant in the last 5 years?
Yes, I had a now 7 month old daughter.

Did you make a birth plan? What were your main preferences? Were they supported?

Yes I did. I wanted the full hypnobirthing experience: pool if available, dimmed lights, gentle voices. When I went to hospital eventually during labour, my birth plan didn't even leave my bag and I wanted all the drugs I was offered.

Were you aware of your choices in both pregnancy and birth?

Yep, I wanted a vaginal birth. This however, was not meant to be.

What were you told about pregnancy and birth before? Did you do any research when you were pregnant about birth?

I did the NCT antenatal course to prepare for labour (though you can't prepare at all really). I only did my own googling about pregnancy.

Would you change anything now? Why?

I had an emergency c-section as my baby was transverse (sideways) and requested a section before pushing which I was refused. As I pushed for nearly two hours, my daughter was very low and I lost a lot of blood when they did the emergency section to get her out. I would have absolutely refused to push but it's hard to implement these things when you're there.

What were your experiences of birth?

It was long (33 hours), frightening when I had my section and above all, extremely painful!

Are you pregnant currently or have you been pregnant in the last 5 years?
Currently 39 weeks pregnant.

Did you make a birth plan?
Not yet, I will, but it will be a very vague plan- I don't want to get too attached to a strict plan because plans might go out of the window.

What were your main preferences? Were they supported?
I'm confident any preferences I choose will be supported because my pregnancy is low risk.

Were you aware of your choices in both pregnancy and birth?
Yes.

What were you told about pregnancy and birth before? Did you do any research when you were pregnant about birth?
This is my 4th so I didn't really need to be told much. Yes I researched even though this is my 4th, when I'm pregnant I do recap the info just incase there's anything new to know- I'm a big fan of reading up on things.

Would you change anything now? Why?
No.

What were your experiences of birth?
I have been very lucky with giving birth. Three uncomplicated vaginal deliveries with fast recovery and short labour times- 10 hours with my first, super fast with second (less than an hour after waking up and waters going, might have been contracting as I slept). 5 hours with third, which was a planned home birth.

Thank you all

@racheljones22

I would also like to know if the coronavirus affected any of your choices or if it had a significant impact on your experience. Thank you so much 😁

100%. My husband was unable to attend our 20 week scan, which was disappointing.

More importantly, he had to wait in the car until I was in active labour in hospital and had to leave very soon after birth, only being able to visit for 2 hours per day. This was particularly difficult as I haemorrhaged and needed a blood transfusion. I was very weak and a particularly vulnerable patient, unable to lift or hold my baby without help. Because it was so busy, I could be pressing the buzzer for a midwife and it'd be half an hour of my baby screaming for a bottle, with nothing I could do but wait. This was very distressing for me when I was in hospital for 5 days.

that must have been so hard sending you all the love, thank you sharing

Are you pregnant currently or have you been pregnant in the last 5 years?
Last birth was December 2017
Did you make a birth plan? What were your main preferences? Were they supported?
Didn't make a plan. Intention was to assess each choice as and when it occurred. Would have taken the water option if it was offered but it wasn't and I wasn't bothered enough to ask. Hoped not to have an epidural and didn't but was open to reconsidering at the time if needed. I wasn't really interested in planning it, more "I'll do it on the night" sort of thing.
Were you aware of your choices in both pregnancy and birth? Aware of what choices there were to be made or aware I was making a choice as it happened. Too ambiguous a question to know what you really want here.
What were you told about pregnancy and birth before? Did you do any research when you were pregnant about birth? I did NCT which went through how labour progresses, pain relief options, basic baby safety and care etc. Not a lot else really. Didn't do any other independent research.
Would you change anything now? Why? No.
What were your experiences of birth? First one is >5 years ago so I assume outside the parameters of your questions although that isn't clear. 2nd one was textbook. Laboured at home for about 6 hours, went to hospital, happy with TENS, sent straight to labour room with gas and air and delivered about 3 hours after getting to hospital. One stitch for minor tear.

Thank you

Are you pregnant currently or have you been pregnant in the last 5 years?

Currently pregnant (32 weeks) with first baby.

Did you make a birth plan? What were your main preferences? Were they supported?

I want to have an ELCS due to fears & tokophobia and have been voicing this with the midwife from day 1 at every appointment and a few followup phone calls. As it's my first baby I'm a bit unsure of the process but they have finally booked me in for a call to discuss it at 36 weeks. I don't feel hugely supported as there's a lot of "oh, you're young and healthy and there's no need for it" but no-one has been outright resistant either, although I fear that they might be kicking the can down the road so I go into labour naturally.

I'm writing a birth plan for what I will do if this happens but it's more about my preferences for the delivery room (no photos, prefer to keep clothes on where possible, as few people in the room as medically necessary) rather than the procedures I'd like, because I have no idea how things will pan out.

Were you aware of your choices in both pregnancy and birth?

I am aware of all the choices available, but I'm not sure I've been given an honest weigh up of the pros and cons.

For instance, my trust offers a series of videos about the birth process rather than antenatal classes. One is about "the pros and cons of a CS vs vaginal birth" - which talks only about the negatives of a CS and the positives of a vaginal birth. No mention is made of any risks of a vaginal birth. They also oddly added that C-section babies were more likely to be autistic, which is based on a very vague correlation and no studies.

What were you told about pregnancy and birth before? Did you do any research when you were pregnant about birth?

I was actually very well informed about pregnancy & birth beforehand (I studied biological ethics). However, it felt very different learning about it when pregnant rather than in an academic sense. I have tried to do more research but I find it very emotional and difficult.

Would you change anything now? Why?

Nope.

What were your experiences of birth?

None yet...!

How has COVID affected things?

Significantly. Many of my appointments have been virtual. They tried to book my pregnancy jabs as phone appointments (!) and it took me threatening to complain to actually book them in. The nurse who did them was shocked at how late it was.

I couldn't get the NIPT test because due to Covid they had halved the number of people taking bloods and the queue to wait was hours long.

Husband was allowed in to scans but none of the other appointments.

Thank you this is really helpful ! I hope everything goes the way you want it to

Are you pregnant currently or have you been pregnant in the last 5 years?
Baby is 3 months old.

Did you make a birth plan? What were your main preferences? Were they supported?
Yes. It went out the window as I was induced. I wanted a water birth with no student Midwives. Ended up in the labour ward with a student midwife but I found her to be invaluable. They were honoured where
Possible, but overall, it just didn’t go to plan.

Were you aware of your choices in both pregnancy and birth? Yes, but I did a lot of research from a lot of sources.

What were you told about pregnancy and birth before? No really.

Did you do any research when you were pregnant about birth? Yes, a lot.
Would you change anything now? Yes. Too much focus is on the birth Experience Why? Nothing will ever prepare me for the recovery after birth, feeling a baby, the pressure from
Midwives (or neglect in some parts) while trying to get to know and take care of a newborn.

What were your experiences of birth?
Positive. Ended up with an assisted delivery, not ideal. But not negative. My post
Natal cafe was just awful and I have had nightmares since reliving it.

Too much emphasis is placed on giving birth. That lasts a few hours or a day. This needs to balance our with postpartum realities which can be a much longer road to recover from. I was shocked about how hard it was.