Experiences with 2nd births

[babydueinautumn]

Hi all,
DD was born after a fairly quick labour by forceps in theatre. She was back2back and became transverse. Due to the very rapid labouring and constant contractions due to her position I basically caved and had pethidine ( the one thing I didn't want as didn't want to be out of it 🙈) epidural wasn't available at the time apparently, although when it became an emergency they soon managed a spinal. Anyways DD was born, I was high as a kite probably on the meds and adrenaline so I didn't really think much about my experience.

Recovery was bad. I felt so so rough physical and mentally drained for the first 4 months. Although this might not have just been due to the delivery as at 3 months my doctor ran my bloods and I was anemic.

I'm now expecting no.2 and starting to get really worried about this birth. I totally know no one can tell me how it's going to go this time or what I should do but if you could share your experiences if you had similar births and what happened for any subsequent children I would really appreciate it. I don't know if my issues with the first birth and likely to cause an increase chance of similar happening again?

Also does anyone know if the episiotomy I had will have scar tissue? I can see why it would but would this impact a natural delivery do you think?

Thanks ladies 😊

So for my first, I had a long labour - think it was 28 hours from waters breaking to holding him. Things were slow and they ended up giving me some Pitocin to help my contractions. He was also in an awkward position (facing my left side) and didn't want to turn. In the end, they took me into theatre and used episiotomy and forceps to turn and deliver him. I lost a fair bit of blood and was also on the anaemic side. We stayed in the hospital for 5 days while Henry had IV antibiotics.

For my second I was in labour for about 2 hours and almost gave birth in the car. He was genuinely born less than 3 minutes after arriving at the hospital curb (my husband missed it by about 20 seconds because he missed the lift!). I was home 4.5 hours later, with no excessive bleeding and no instrumental delivery.

Two completely different labours! For my first I was also much more stationary, for my second I had been labouring while standing etc, which I assume helped his positioning.

So just know that your first experience doesn't pre-determine your next delivery!

My first labour was a lot like yours. 49 hours of back to back pain, it was horrific.

Second - I was induced, and then labour last about three hours. Just gas and air. I loved it, no kidding. If I could do it again I would. It was like my body just recognised what it needed to do, and it sort of took over for me. When it needed to push, it pushed, when it needed to stop, it stopped. I felt a bit like a passenger. It was an incredible feeling actually.

1st was really long, baby back to back, took all the drugs offered (two injections) was high as a kite ended in ECS.

Second labour a few hours at home. Off to hospital, straight into delivery. Baby popped out about an hour or so later. So so so different to the first. Home that day.

Good luck.

My labours sound very like @UnderHisAye

1st - 52 hour back to back forceps delivery (with no bloody pain relief!) awful and I felt traumatised.

2nd -all done in under 2 hours. Out in 3 pushes. Had gas and air. It was quite easy really. It was so cathartic.

Obviously nobody can predict what your second birth will be like but my first was 24 hours from having 'a show' to DS being born. He was back to back. Went into hospital 5cm dilated and told it was too late to have an epidural but he wasn't born for another twelve hours!
I had no desire to push and his heart rate kept dropping, so ended up with the emergency buzzer going, a room full of people, ventouse and the resuscitation trolley. It was pretty scary.

Second birth was completely opposite. Still back to back and contractions for a few days but regular for about twenty hours but I went into hospital at 9cm dilated. Lovely midwife and student midwife delivered DD. They encouraged me to stand at the side of the bed. Felt the urge to push this time and everything was fine! No tears or anything.
I remember being offered gas and air and I said, 'Oh yeah, can do I suppose'!
Mind you, DS was 8lb 2oz and DD was 6lb 151/2 oz. Don't know if that made any difference 🤷🏻‍♀️

Thanks ladies- your experiences have calmed me. I know no one knows what labour/births are going to be like but it is good to know that a lot are more positive next time around!! Xx

My first birth was awful- I think I ended up with some PTSD from it.

Anyway, baby number two was unplanned and I panicked so often during pregnancy. They couldn't and wouldn't give me a C section unless life or death due to the anaesthetic risk. I cried and cried when I went into Labour because I was so afraid. Baby number two came out easily, totally chilled delivery, placenta came out intact and within fifteen minutes of delivery. Same for baby three.

My first was long, 32 hours and he was born back to back.

Second was so easy. First stage only lasted 20 minutes and second stage was basically just one push.

I’m loving these replies, @UnderHisAye yours was so nice to read!

I also had a back to back first baby. It mentally broke me. Ended up with an epidural, pushed for 2 hours and just when doctor was about to get the forceps DD flew out accompanied by a huge tear and I lost a lot of blood.

Hoping by law of probability this baby won’t be back to back and I can have a different experience this time. Would absolutely love a water birth as I laboured for a couple of hours in the pool before my epidural and it made a huge difference! Something very calming about the water.

Supposedly, second births are easiest... Seems to be true on this thread! My 1st was 24 hours of early labour, but then only 3 hours of active labour so I was very lucky.

With DS2, from 1st contraction to baby born was just over 2 hours, and it was honestly a walk in the park! I remember a few mins after baby was born, I told the midwife, that was so easy, i'm ready to do it all over again!

My second birth was beautiful.

My first was ok, 6 hours, bleed in early labour, stirrups on the labour ward, 3rd degree tear.

Second was in the pool in the birth centre. Under 3 hours, no tear. Arrived at the hospital at 4 am, born 5:30am home 11am.

My first, 10 hours from waters going to baby in arms- it was scary because of the unknown so I was holding back that final push til they told me they were going to get the Dr, at which point the fear of instruments beat the fear of the unknown and he was out in the next push!

With my second we got to the hospital about 2 minutes before he was out...it was pretty funny tbh, they showed me to a room and the bed was up at chest height. They said to me they'd get the bed down and I said No! That's perfect! and proceeded to hold on to it while advising he midwife to "Catch!" and there he was, 2 weeks early, and clearly perfectly positioned for a rapid, water-slide-eque exit!

Third was a home birth (due to the almost not getting to hospital on time with my second), and lasted just a few hours, it was so nice giving birth at home then being able to relax with baby after, without worrying about postnatal wards.

I feel like I've been super lucky with labour, and I'm expecting my 4th, and hope that luck continues. Aiming for a birth center birth this time, as I feel the need to be near to the hospital.

Same as all above, first went on for days- exhausted and no idea what I was doing. Pushing was nearly 2 hours. Second one I did panic when contractions started, it brings it all back BUT it was manageable because it was 6 hours from very start to finish and she was out in three pushes. I was so chilled after that instead of the trauma I felt first time around.

DC1 - 45 hours from arrival at hospital for the induction to delivery. Every bit of intervention going, eventually delivered by forceps in theatre whilst being prepped for an emergency c-sec. Attached to a catheter for 24hrs, discharged after 56, couldn't really walk for a week or so.
DC2 - delivered 29 mins after I arrived at the hospital having gone in not sure if I was in labour or had trapped wind! Took 3 pushes. Walked to the shower about an hour later; was told I could be discharged a few hours after that but (possibly in an MN first!) asked to stay in overnight; left at mid-morning; took toddler DC1 to the park that afternoon with DC2 in the pram. The park is about half a mile away.

Wow loving all these positive stories! My first was quite drawn out with the drip so would love a better second birth! Good luck OP, and to myself as well positive thoughts

I felt the same and did a Birth Reflections session - basically a midwife talks you through what happened at your birth. I also had an instrumental delivery, episiotomy and back to back, but mine was ventouse and didn’t have to go to theatre. I wanted to know how distressed my baby actually was (medium, she wasn’t about to die but they weren’t going to let her stay in much longer), ask if my high blood pressure/suspected preeclampsia issues would return (20% chance) and also talk about whether a c section would have been better (no, it’s worse for tiny babies and mothers with high bp). I found it really helpful.

I’ve now had my second 4 weeks ago, the bp/preeclampsia issues DID return so I was induced again, but my baby was bigger and coped with labour better (could be that my bp was better monitored and controlled, could be that I was induced a bit earlier, could be just luck). She was out in less than 3 hours from the drip being set (first labour was 8 hours). I did find it a little bit more painful (I declined pethidine as felt it did nothing the first time - in hindsight maybe it did?) and I had horrible adrenaline shakes BUT it was lovely and quick. I had a second degree tear but it’s been much less painful than my episiotomy - I didn’t need any pain relief for it, not even paracetamol. I felt wonderful after the birth, had a lovely bath and could have gone home then if they’d let me. The recovery was much easier, even with a toddler at home to wrangle! I can’t feel my tear at all, whereas my episiotomy ached fit months afterwards. The one thing that was worse was the after birth contractions -WAY worse than the first time and some nearly as bad as actual labour contractions!

Good luck! I think second births are nearly always easier. And it’s true that it’s way easier having 2 little ones than wrangling a toddler while pregnant!

Just to buck the trend, my second wasn't easier but then I've had three very difficult and very different births!

I won't go into all the details as it wasn't particularly nice but just to say, it's natural to fret but honestly, none of it matters at the time, you just deal with whatever it throws at you.

In terms of recovery, 2nd and 3rd time there wasn't a lot of time to think about it. Just had to get on with it!