How did you cope in hospital during Covid?

[L3tsD0Th1S2020]

Makes me emotional to think I'll be alone so much in hospital as a first time mum. especially the postpartum ward.

I keep thinking I hope labour/delivery goes so smoothly that I can go home within the day. Partner won't be allowed to join me on the ward that first night potentially.

As a first time mom I'm clueless. I've felt a part of a 2 person team up until now. now that due date is nearing its dawning on me that I'm suddenly going to be on my own during the birth (until the end) and postpartum for hours/days.

just makes me sad.

am I alone in this?

You're not alone . I had my baby on 9th December 2020 during lockdown. I couldn't have my partner with me until I was in active labour (5cm dilated). My husband had to leave right after birth while I was getting my stitches lol.

I had a very positive labour however the ward was really a bad experience. Being FTM everything is new to us. Breast feeding baby literally every five minutes.

Try your best with getting as much advices as possible and if you need to press the damn buzzer for assistance then please do. The nurses and midwifes are there to help.

I didn't have a positive labour ward experience . The staff were not particularly nice to me so I couldn't wait to get out.

I'm sure you'll be fine. Try to get as much rest as you can when baby is asleep. The little ones are really beautiful when they are born. Don't pack too much clothes for the newborn . If you are planning to breastfeed you will be doing lots of skin to skin so a nice blanket / swaddle blanket will be needed aswell as hats.

If you need anything please feel free to ask me anything I've been through it and I'm a first time mum.

How come you’ll be on your own for the whole thing? (Sorry if I’ve read that wrong!)
I had a baby 2 weeks ago and I completely forgot about COVID while I was there to be honest!
In the delivery suite room my partner was allowed the whole time during the birth and for around 3/4 hours after while they stitched me up and got me and baby both settled (by that point it was 2am anyway so we were ready for some sleep!)
Next day he was allowed back for visiting for 2 hours at lunch and they let him stay another hour as they were about to let me leave anyway. The morning flew by as id got so many lovely people coming to do routine checks. My labour kicked off quick (I was 9cm and a bit panicked when we got to the room) so my partner and I completely forgot about masks in the chaos until after he arrived and the midwives didn’t even say anything. Think my partner should of been wearing one. I had had a negative COVID test though the day before as they were originally planning to induce me. The next day we wore them when staff entered the room but again half of them told me to not even bother getting up to get it.
I don’t know if it was pure luck or because I wasn’t there long but I never left my private room the whole time I was there, it was lovely and relaxed.
From what I’m aware of now one partner can be with you the whole time during birth (inductions and c sections I think the rule is they can get you settled then come back when labour starts/your op is booed for but not 100%)
Im a FTM too (and a total baby novice) and the whole thing was honestly fine. Talk to your midwife about your concerns though ☺️ Oh and take your an iPad loaded with some good downloaded shows to watch for if you do have any lonely hours

thank you @sabdellahi I appreciate that. Each time I've been to hospital appointment I've had a mixed experience with doctors and midwives. some are beyond lovely but others are the complete opposite. That plays into my concerns. I wish I could just have a familiar face around at a time I'll be at my most vulnerable. I'm assumed like @piccalily below that my husband would be allowed to stay for longer and visit again. I pinned my hopes on that. finding out today that that won't be the case was just a bit of a daunting realisation.

@piccalily19 no you didn't read wrong. I've been told by my hospital that my husband will have to leave an hour after birth. he won't be allowed to visit at all no matter how long I'm there. if needed he can drop items off at front desk for me.

I also won't be in a private room I'll be on a public ward with other mums.

Honestly,despite having my husband allowed to visit between 10-6, by day 5 post birth the minute my sons antibiotics stopped I was arguing with a consultant at 2am trying to get to discharged, I got discharged at 1pm but I d been very clear I d be walking out without the medicines I needed if I wasn't home by teatime that day (I don't mean to scare you but we were left 2.5 days with my waters broken as it was that busy so I felt I had to be rude to the staff at that point as I just didn't feel safe there) .
I d make it very clear to the staff that you want to be home as soon as possible.

And don't be afraid to press the buzzer and press it again and make a nusiance of yourself

@1990shopefulftm you're dead right. my experience with the staff so far has shown me I'll need to be able to stand my ground with things. suppose that's why it's hard. antenatal classes etc reinforce so much that your partner is to be your advocate and to ensure you are heard etc. of course that goes goes out the window in the world of covid.

I'll buck up and prepare myself for this now. have no choice and it might turn out better than expected. I'll definitely be making it clear that all going well with baby I want to be discharged sooner rather than later

@L3tsD0Th1S2020 I hope you have a better experience than me but yes it's good to be prepared.

My experience was great, honestly

Partners were never allowed on the postnatal ward overnight in our trust anyway, and our first (pre Covid) was born in the evening so he went home not long after. The ward was busy and the next day so noisy with so many visitors

Had DC2 in lockdown and it was so much nicer. DH went home as before, and had a much more peaceful night on the ward as less women per room due to regulations, and no constant stream of visitors the next day. In our hospital birth partners only were allowed to visit in the day, if that's not an option I can see that it would be harder particularly with a c section recovery etc, but personally I found everything a lot easier with only birth partners visiting the other women on the ward

I did have to go in alone before midwives checked me to confirm I was in established labour but it was fine, my DH just waited in the car until I called him to say it was ok to join me

Just read that you definitely won't have your DH visit and I realise that is harder for recovery especially as a FTM

That said, on balance I think I'd have probably preferred it still to the chaotic noisy crampt pre Covid postnatal ward, but I didn't have a c section or complications so physically didn't need the help and I realise that's not the case for everyone

I also was worried about it so to find I preferred it was a surprise to me too!

I had a mixed experience. The staff were amazing, so kind and helpful. They honestly couldn't do enough for me. However my first baby was an emergency c section to a premature baby as I had a life threating condition and I've had 3 miscarriages since that have left me traumatised since. I have diagnosed ptsd which is particularly bad in hospital.
My newest baby was also prem and born very poorly but he was with me all the time. So as you can imagine that after a few days in hospital I was going off the deep end without my husband and other child. We were in for a month and it was hell for me but the staff were so nice and comforting

Second was a planned section

My dd is ten now, so quite some time ago! But there was swine flu, bird flu and the norovirus so was only allowed limited visitors.
I was so glad when my partner was told to go home! He was getting in the way and not being at all helpful.
And, when you're trying to BF your baby, having strange men walking around, staring at your boobs is quite off putting!
The maternity nurses were lovely and helped so much (in my case, more than the midwives) and one was an older lady who was like having my mum there with me.

I honestly don’t think things would be much diff with covid or without covid post partum.
With both of mine DH had to go home pretty soon after, with my first due to the birth at 3pm, post surgery I didn’t go onto the ward until 6pm and no visitors beyond 7pm.
With my second we had another child at home to look after.
Honestly no one knows how to look after a child the first time around, we all just muddle
Through. Press the buzzer, ask for help if you need it, but don’t worry about it. I’d never held a new baby till ds came along, never changed a nappy etc!! It just comes in time and is easy with your own

I had a hard time of it to be honest. I had an emcs with complications and was in for 5 days. It was hard without my dh but I got through it and you will too. Take books and magazines with you and pay for the tv service in your cubicle to pass the time. Before you know it (hopefully within 24 hours!) you'll be home.

I’ve had a baby in non covid and covid times and it didn’t really make much difference. My 1st baby was a 23hr labour (from active to delivery - you really want to stay home until your in active labour) so my husband had also been up that whole time and he was exhausted. I sent him home quite soon after the birth so that at least one of us caught up on sleep. He could have stayed over night but would have been on a wooden chair the whole time so he didn’t stay. Everyone else did have their partners stay so it was noisy and uncomfortable for me.

My 2nd time I was in hosp before active labour (booked in for induction but given the chance to progress naturally as I had already started too) so I was alone for that, but it helped me to focus and I actually spoke to the other mums this time.

Husband joined me as soon as I was in active and in the delivery room, I had an amazing birth (only 5hours!) and then they let him stay for a good few hours after maybe 5? He went before being asked because our son was at home. This hosp doesn’t let dads stay anyway and we couldn’t have both left our son.
I had a private room and was happy to have peace and actually get some sleep. I went home the next day. The only hard bit was packing up my room on my own but I probably should have made someone help me!

My covid birth was a way better experience than non covid!

Do you know that you need to be induced? If not then hopefully you'll only be alone pre-birth very briefly, while they examine you - you don't really want to be in hospital unless in active labour anyway.

I gave birth on Monday and like a pp basically forgot about Covid and was never alone - I went in while DH waited in the car park for about half an hour but they confirmed I was in active labour so he then came in, then I was discharged 5 hours after giving birth and he stayed for that entire time. It was my second labour and a lot quicker/smoother than my first, but I didn't go to postnatal ward for my first either, so it is possible, though obviously nothing you can do to control it. In my experience they really don't want to keep women in for any longer than they have to (I think how quickly some friends have been sent home after C sections is actually a bit alarming), Covid or no Covid.k

I gave birth in a delivery suite on labour ward after being induced, with my Dh with me the whole time. We were then taken down to the midwife led unit as it was quiet and got to stay there for 24 hours before discharge. The only time I thought about covid was walking in the hospital because of all the signs and when they gave me the PCR test before induction. I had a great experience and couldn't really tell I was in a pandemic to be honest!

I had DS2 one week into the first lockdown. I had a c section and DH was allowed in for the op and had to leave about an hour after he was born.

Honestly? It was lovely! When I was on the post natal ward with DS1 it was so busy with visitors coming and going and constant noise. This time was ridiculously quiet with only me and a couple of other ladies on the ward. It was so nice to recover and establish breast feeding without strangers coming and going!

Please don't worry. I understand your fears especially as a FTM but the midwives are there to help and in my experience are (mostly) great.

I had my baby in second lockdown and was induced so went in on the Monday by myself. To be honest, that was the most boring bit by myself but I imagine my partner would just annoy me if he was just sat there bored too.
He was allowed back in at 1am when I moved to delivery suite, I was only 1cm but had some induction complications. Baby was born at 1pm by emergency section and he stayed with us until around 6.30pm until I went to the ward. Again, on the ward, I can’t imagine partners being there to be much help! The bays are tiny and it was already noisy enough with the mums and babies. I had some breastfeeding difficulties in the night and a nurse came around and was amazing and helped me for about an hour. The next day you’re so busy with different people coming round to check you and baby and feed you (so many 3 course meals!) that you don’t even have time to worry about being on your own. However, when I went for a shower I did notice there were nurses around ward helping new mums dress and change their babies. I heard one nurse/midwife go through with a new mum step by step how to change baby and what to dress them in.
We can went home at about 3pm. The staff were all lovely.

@L3tsD0Th1S2020

Makes me emotional to think I'll be alone so much in hospital as a first time mum. especially the postpartum ward.

I keep thinking I hope labour/delivery goes so smoothly that I can go home within the day. Partner won't be allowed to join me on the ward that first night potentially.

As a first time mom I'm clueless. I've felt a part of a 2 person team up until now. now that due date is nearing its dawning on me that I'm suddenly going to be on my own during the birth (until the end) and postpartum for hours/days.

just makes me sad.

am I alone in this?

If you don't mind me asking what hospital have you chosen to give birth in?

I'm based in Ireland - I think you are too is that right?

As of last week my hospital announced you could have one visitor for 2 hours on the postnatal ward per daycare so your hospital might have recently changed their policy. Worth a check.

I was very relieved!

I had my baby during the 1st lockdown, hubby had a few hours with me whilst i aas on labour ward then had to go when i went onto the normal ward. I think they are allowing partners on the wards now at set times, check with your local hospital.

But my experience was all positive! Midwives were lovely, i thought i'd worry as FTM on 'what to do' but your motherly instincts kick in. They are normally very sleepy for the first few days from the birth.

I sat on the ward whilst baby slept next to me in the cot and i facetimed all my family members and showed them the baby and had a chat about the labour etc. Adrenaline was running for days after the labour, and it went so quick when i was on the ward that i didnt even check the clock once and it was time to go, and i'd been on there for 8 hours!