Seeing the consultant today to discuss getting planned c section what to expect

[whoeverthrewthatpaperyamomsaho]

I'm 36 weeks and am seeing the consultant tomorrow to talk about my request what can I expect? Will they make the decision ? I know they cannot refuse me as I have the right to one but what if tries to tell me that I don't like the last woman did

I had a meeting with a consultant to discuss my desired c section for DD2. My first had ended in an emergency section and the surgeon had told me clearly that my pelvis was very narrow "more like a male's" was what she said and she also said "No amount of trying would have got that baby out naturally" DD1 was 9 pounds.

With DD2 ...armed with this knowledge I was not going to risk another emergency so asked for a planned.

The consultant was a dismissive cow who said "There's no reason to think you can't give birth naturally!"

I went home and called my midwife who was very annoyed indeed and immediately called the consultant to request my planned section. It was granted.

If they try to tell you that you don't have the right, just remain calm and insist. Say "No, I want one" then if they argue just add things like "No, my mind is made up...I am requesting a c section" and don't be drawn into reasons.

I had my meeting a few days ago, and I expected it to be difficult but it wasn’t.

She checked that I had considered vbac and knew if the baby decided to come early it might not be possible to have a section if things were progressing quickly. She checked if there was anything else that could be put in place to make things easier- so she’s referring me to the infant feeding team as I had difficulty establishing breastfeeding last time.

She agreed to the section and agreed to put in my notes that I want a sterilisation at the same time. She explained sterilisation is less effective if done at the same time as a section.

I was expecting a battle but it was actually the opposite. I felt respected and listened to and supported. I really, really hope you have a similar experience.

I feel like I hit the jackpot this pregnancy as I have been so well supported- I had a very traumatic first birth and struggled with the mental health effects for nearly four years but the support I have had the last few months has been so healing.

@FortunesFave thanks x the last woman literally said to me that I don't have a right to request one and said that they do not do requests..... but then proceeded to say she would refer me to the birth choices clinic so made herself look a right tool there. She also kept asking "why do you want one" "why" and I told her my reasons And basically made me feel as thought they wasn't good enough.

I have tokophobia and asthma and also have the herpes virus which can be passed on through birth My midwife has prescribed me medication to take daily to prevent it but I still want a c section even if I won't have a flare up

@Brandaris thanks for your reply I'm glad everything's worked out for you :) I hope I have a similar experience I'm seeing a man tomorrow don't know what he will be like the hospital I'm going to there not really nice people when I first raised the request the consultant and receptionist were talking about me and laughing so it made me really upset and I actually complained about them I emailed PALs there the only reason why I even have this appointment I've been battling to try and get one since 20 weeks pregnant and wasn't being taken seriously I'm 36 weeks now they've left it so late

Don't let them push you about. I tell you something...if men had babies, 99% of births would be c section.

I know it's not fashionable to say this but I would have a section over natural birth any day. It's out and done with quickly, no heaving and grunting in agony...done. Yes the recovery is a bit tricky for some...and there are associated risks but that's the same for birth too.

@FortunesFave I agree your 100% right finally someone who understands and not telling me I'm crazy for wanting one a c section is so much more calmer, you feel more in control, everything's planned out, it's over and done with with no faffing about. The thought of birth terrifies me watch one born every minute. Absolutely mortifying. All the hours and hours of pain 😭and then pushing out something so big. It makes me cringe I don't even think I'd be able to. No thanks I'd chose a c section any day

I know some people take pride in natural birth but I'm most definitely not one of them! My first try with DD1 was terrifying, traumatic and awful from start to finish. The pain, the tonnes of staff...DH fainted when they tried to ventouse DD out...awful! My planned section with DD2 was wonderful! DH and I laughed and were happy during and after. Come back and tell us what they say OP...I'll be thinking of you.x

@FortunesFave
Thank you I definitely will ☺️xx

I haven’t got anything to add about your appointment I’m afraid but just wanted to add that I’ve had two sections (one emergency and one elective due to previous emergency one) and so many people have expressed sympathy that I didn’t “get to experience a natural birth” whereas I was relieved when they said any further births should be by section. I don’t feel like I missed out on anything!

The consultant went through all the c section risks with me and told me there was no reason I couldn’t VBAC (oh has been told in theatre I’d never deliver normally) butthat he could tell I’d already made my mind up. He also said if I did labour again they wouldn’t leave me as long. He signed off the c section and then my midwife booked it.
5 days before my c section I had a massive panic that I didn’t want one, a couple of days later I went into labour and had an unassisted VBAC. So I didn’t actually get the c section even though it was booked.

@user1493413286 I'd of told them fine by me I do not want to experience a birth ever 😂 only thing that I would be "missing out on" as they say is pain. Lots and lots of pain.

@Itllbeaninterestingchristmas
I hope he'll sign it for me and without having to put up a fight😫 what made you back out last minute if you don't mind me asking

Hi OP,

I had a midwife say to me "you don't get one just because you want one" at 16 weeks

At 28 weeks I had a consultant say " go away and have a think about why you want major surgery for no reason"

31 weeks birth choices the conversation went like this:
Have you thought about how you would like to give birth?
Yes, I'd like a c section
Ok, we just need to discuss the risks to make sure you are comfortable with them
Sure I've read the NICE guidelines, the RCOG guidelines and the hospitals policy and list of comparative risks
Ok, we'll book you in for 39 weeks

So hopefully it will all be fine for you today too

An individual consultant can refuse to carry out a caesarean birth but they are supposed to then give you the option of seeing an alternative consultant who.might take a different view. They should give you a full run down of the pros and cons of caesarean birth and the possible risks. You can ask about the possible risks and benefits of vaginal birth too of course.

@EvilEdna1 I'm allready almost 37 weeks I'm scared that if I have to be referred to someone else it's too late

I went in expecting a bit of a fight but it wasn’t! I had a very traumatic first birth and the idea of having to labour again induced panic. I requested a cons appointment and elective at booking in and saw the consultant after my 12 week scan. They agreed without any argument and on reading my notes actually agreed it was best due to high risk of SD again. If you have chance before your appointment read over the NICE guidelines they say if it is for anxiety or just a maternal request this needs to be listened to (they do have to discuss the risks so expect to listen to that) and if the obstetrician you see doesn’t agree to it they should refer you for a second opinion. Go armed with the info I actually took the nice guidance with the relevant parts highlighted in my bag but didn’t need them! Good luck, my elective section was a amazing I felt so I control which I really needed after the first birth!

@TakeMeToYourLiar I think it's so wrong how women feel as though it has to be a battle to get one and get told different things from different professionals us as women have a right to choose how we want to give birth we shouldn't have to feel forced into something we don't want to do and thank you I hope so 💞

@Itsalwayssunnyupnorth thanks x and yea the reason I want one is because I'm terrified to give birth and I have asthma

I don’t know it was just blind panic. They did ask me more than once when I got to hospital in labour if I was sure I didn’t want a c section.

@FortunesFave wow. I was not expecting this. I just got home and I am not exaggerating litterally the second I walked into the room and sat on that chair he booked me in within seconds. I didn't even need to say a word I came so prepared to have a long discussion/argument. Theese were the first words out of his mouth. "It's almost 5 o'clock, it's late, everyone here is tired there's no point going over and over I am going to book it for you now" he said that as I was only just sitting down and boom c section booked for the 26th of November I'm so happy but I'm really nervous now, it's all real!

Well done! That's going to be such a relief!

So pleased for you, now you just need to relax and enjoy the last couple of weeks of pregnancy!

That’s really good news.

Thank you all ☺️💞 xx

I’m so glad, that’s great news!

Brilliant news :)