What’s wrong with a hospital birth?

[KO2018]

I’m first time pregnant, 18 weeks, and the whole idea of giving birth is starting to become more real.

There’s lots of things I don’t understand.

In my mind, it is a medical procedure - like having a major operation - and I was prepared for being surrounded by doctors and nurses and all the specialist equipment money can buy. Painkillers available as needed. For me this is a reassuring picture.

My local labour unit looks like a spa - it’s all ambient coloured lights, even actual fake candles?? The rooms are like hotel suites and they are always posting things about the power of your body, and how women know more than medical practitioners about what their body needs.

Come again? This is in complete contradiction to everything I have known and been told about medical care up until this point.

I guess I don’t understand - what is the problem about having a hospital birth or an epidural or frankly anything else that might make me feel safe...?

(This is a genuine question I am quite open to changing my mind but I feel like I am missing something)

Shhhh!

Personally i found pregnancy, childbirth and the newborn phase all incredibly hard work in different ways. None of it fun, in my experience, but other strange women enjoy some or all of it!

I'm not planning a third baby, but if I did have one I'd be asking for a home birth. My labours are short and got shorter. I actually don't think I'd make it to our hospital in time for another baby lol

It's about the risk mostly. If your pregnancy proceeds without any anticipated risk, you could very well have a spa like environment to give birth, keeping you calm and relaxed as the labour proceeds. If there is expected risk, you could be advised to give birth in hospital ward side and if you have an elected C Section, it would be the OT with the operating and supporting team.

When we were viewing the maternity hospital they basically showed us a corridor and said turn right for drug free labour and turn left if you want the drugs! I tried to tell them I wasn't interested in not having drugs and insisted on turning left but they insisted I tour the midwife led unit as well!

I was shown the birthing suite in the ML unit and it had this massive oval bath in it and mood lighting and it lit up like the bloody starship enterprise 🤣 with twinkly start lights on the ceiling. Bouncy balls and iPod docking (that was the only thing which interested DH incidentally!). It put me off to be honest!

Thankfully I ended up needing a planned c section due to having a breech baby

Yes I wouldn’t want any woman to be scared of needing a planned section, I couldn’t believe how civilised it was (I realise it isn’t easy for everyone )

The thing is, not everyone finds a "spa atmosphere" calming. I bloody hate spas at the best of times! So for me, it wasn't a trade off between risk and comfort. The MLU vibe just wasn't up my street and I was as calm as I was ever going to be on the labour ward, low-risk birth and all.

I once overheard two rather well-spoken women in a cafe near a hospital, sounded like they were senior staff there or academics, talking casually about how all the low risk women could just be sent to an MLU. I was really annoyed and felt fobbed off (whoever they were). So casually the right to an epidural brushed off!

@KO2018 Highly recommend looking at The Positive Birth Company if you’re feeling a bit confused about everything 😊 the “digital pack” is about £40ish from what I remember and it’s got loads of good info about the risks and benefits of various birth places and birth choices etc 😊

It depends how you feel about risk. The midwife who looked after me when I was having pfb mentioned that she'd had 4 easy home births but her 5th child was a difficult labour and she had to transfer into hospital for an EMCS. You cannot predict how any birth will go. I chose hospital and am so glad I did, because if I hadn't DD wouldn't be here with us today.

allfurcoatnoknickers

How old are your children?

@speakout

Giving birth to a child is the easy bit.

Raising a child is 1000 times harder.

What a weirdly irrelevant comment - it's not like the OP, or anyone else at all, made any reference to giving birth being harder than raising a child?

Also, it's apples and oranges. You can't compare.

I had my kids at home. That's what seemed best and most natural to me. I think everyone is different. Lots of people I know would hate the idea of having a baby at home but I felt the same about going to hospital (unless a medical emergency)

Horses for courses 😊

@PlanDeRaccordement

Birth isn’t a “medical procedure” it a natural bodily function that may require medical assistance.

This. And if baby is in the wrong position or your body isn't acting favourably then no amount of dim lights, whale sounds and oxytocin is going to help.

That's not to be negative about it, but there's very little you can actually "do" to make it any different. What I'm trying to say is, you get the birth you get, go with the setting where you feel most comfortable.

Both approaches are valid and it’s right that mothers can choose what suits them. There’s no wrong option.

Personally, I’m insisting on the labour ward for my second labour because I did not cope well the first time around and want the option to request an epidural. Warm water and whale song wasn’t going to cut it for me! Positive affirmations was not going to overcome the pain. Midwife suggested a home birth this time around, I think “hell no” was my response. I want alllllllll the pain relief and to know I’m really close to surgery should something go wrong. That’s my comfort.

For plenty of other women, the relaxing atmosphere, or being at home, replicating the cave etc is comforting for them.

Go with your gut.

Childbirth is no joke...it's fucking lethal

What a sensitive thing to say to a pregnant woman. Clearly it isn’t lethal, given that the vast majority of us survive it.

@VinylDetective

Childbirth is no joke...it's fucking lethal

What a sensitive thing to say to a pregnant woman. Clearly it isn’t lethal, given that the vast majority of us survive it.

Yes I did say upthread it was the wrong use of words. But potentially child birth can be dangerous. I think we take it for granted in developed countries that it is relatively safe...like I said, I had easy births..in fact my second was a water birth with no intervention but it's not a given that its going to be straightforward.

@VinylDetective surely most women are aware that child birth can potentially be extremely dangerous or fatal? Really don't think that comment was that bad. It is so important for women to have a choice in the type of birth they would prefer. However, I think the tendency to prefer "normal"/"natural" deliveries can easily lead to disappointment, as it is simply not realistic for many women, for whatever reason. For most of history, child birth was the single most dangerous thing a woman would do in her life. Evolution doesn't need every mother and baby to survive, just enough to secure the continuing existence of the species. Child birth can be dangerous, and it's important we're aware of that. How this knowledge then influences your decision making is a different issue altogether.

A Midwife Led Unit in a hospital is a good compromise for a first baby in a straightforward pregnancy. You probably won't need the machines and doctors but they will be available if you do. Plenty of women give birth with nothing other than gas and air. It's not easy but it's fine.
With my first I was home within 10 hours.

Nothing wrong with a hospital birth if that's what you want; but for many it isn't

Some women don't want medical intervention into something so natural - unless it's really required. It's only in the past 70 or so years it's been standard so that's 1000's more years it's not been!

Also, some of the standard hospital birth processes can slow labour or push you into starting labour before you feel ready. However you can request things like lower level lighting and birthing/labouring positions more conducive to a 'gravity assisted' birth

Download the 'fear free childbirth' podcast, do some more online research and keep an open mind, then see how you feel

Your body, your baby, your choice

@jackstini it's fine not to want medical intervention of course, but have you looked at the enormous decline in fetal and maternal mortality over the past 70 years?? The argument that women have been giving birth for thousands of years without medical intervention really grinds my gears. They have, and women and their babies used to also regularly die in the process.

@Letmegetthisrightasawoman
Agreed - medical intervention can be great. However, there are occasions where it doesn’t help or even hinders and sometimes falling into the trap of it being standard can be as dangerous as it not being there

It’s getting that fine balance where women feel empowered enough to listen to their bodies, have confidence in them and be allowed to make choices that are right for them without too great a risk

surely most women are aware that child birth can potentially be extremely dangerous or fatal?

Of course they are, that doesn’t equate to “fucking lethal”. The key word in your sentence is “potentially”. The maternal mortality rate currently stands at 13.4 in 100,000 births which is hardly lethal or even high on the risk scale. Obviously it’s too many.

My point was that it’s hardly helpful to say something like that to a woman who’s clearly already anxious about the birth of her child.

Mammals give birth in small dark private places so it's actually very unusual for us to do it in the presence of others in big bright rooms! This makes it more likely we will have a slower longer labour (imagine doing a poo in this scenario never mind labouring a baby!). We should have medical attention near by if needs be however by nature it is not a medical thing to do.

Of course they are, that doesn’t equate to “fucking lethal”. The key word in your sentence is “potentially”. The maternal mortality rate currently stands at 13.4 in 100,000 births which is hardly lethal or even high on the risk scale

Yes @vinyldetective I have said I should have added the word potentially. As for your statistic, imagine how much higher it would be if we didn't give birth in hospitals or centres with medical facilities available.