What’s wrong with a hospital birth?

[KO2018]

I’m first time pregnant, 18 weeks, and the whole idea of giving birth is starting to become more real.

There’s lots of things I don’t understand.

In my mind, it is a medical procedure - like having a major operation - and I was prepared for being surrounded by doctors and nurses and all the specialist equipment money can buy. Painkillers available as needed. For me this is a reassuring picture.

My local labour unit looks like a spa - it’s all ambient coloured lights, even actual fake candles?? The rooms are like hotel suites and they are always posting things about the power of your body, and how women know more than medical practitioners about what their body needs.

Come again? This is in complete contradiction to everything I have known and been told about medical care up until this point.

I guess I don’t understand - what is the problem about having a hospital birth or an epidural or frankly anything else that might make me feel safe...?

(This is a genuine question I am quite open to changing my mind but I feel like I am missing something)

It's a bit early to be thinking about antenatal classes anyway - they're usually held from 30 weeks or later, at least in my trust - so what the options will be under the current circumstances may not yet be clear.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=qetEoq6l4t8

This video explains.

@KO2018

Thank you - I also have no idea about complications from epidurals? I haven’t spoken with the midwife about any of that, plus I’m not going to any antenatal classes due to the pandemic.

So yes please book recommendations would be great! I am really nervous! And don’t know anything. Thanks all

I'd really recommend looking for some online classes.

It's a good idea to really do you're research in advance so you know all the pros and cons of the various interventions. As well as what to expect with labour and birth.

A great book for after baby arrives is called your baby week by week. Best book ever

I agree. I had one in hospital and one in the labour unit which is part of the hospital. I wouldn't have gone to it if it was in a separate location. My midwife kept trying to persuade me to have a home birth. I would never ever willingly give birth at home or any distance away from a hospital. It's absolute madness to me. Childbirth is no joke...it's fucking lethal.

You can sit at home with your fairy lights and whale music another time!

Also agree with PP who said it's not "like a medical procedure" at all, it's only like having a major operation if you have a c section (which isn't like having a major operation, it is a major operation!)
A vaginal birth is a natural biological process that might require medical intervention but might not, it's something that the birthing mother does and not something that medical professionals do to her.
For that reason I don't really like it when people say that a midwife/doctor delivered a baby, sometimes the HCP gets the baby out (if it's a c-section or instrumental delivery) but apart from that it's the mother who pushes the baby out!

Absolutely nothing wrong with a hospital birth, we all want and need different things. I found the discussion on this at the NCT class really helpful although I know others often find they are biased against hospital births and interventions.
I wanted a hospital birth for the security of knowing that there would be consultants and equipment there in case needed.... which they were in the end, and it all happened so quickly that it would have been difficult in a setting where transfer to hospital was needed. But, there is another side to the medicalisation of childbirth. I'm far from an expert in this area, but I do think there is a problem with overuse of medical intervention in hospital births. Sorry, I probably just confused the issue further!

@NameChange30

Also agree with PP who said it's not "like a medical procedure" at all, it's only like having a major operation if you have a c section (which isn't like having a major operation, it is a major operation!) A vaginal birth is a natural biological process that might require medical intervention but might not, it's something that the birthing mother does and not something that medical professionals do to her. For that reason I don't really like it when people say that a midwife/doctor delivered a baby, sometimes the HCP gets the baby out (if it's a c-section or instrumental delivery) but apart from that it's the mother who pushes the baby out!

The "deliver" is supposed to mean "liberate from" - as in the Lord's Prayer "deliver us from evil". To be delivered of a child = to be relieved of the cargo you've been carrying! It wasn't meant to be like delivering a parcel, but the meaning of deliver has shifted over time.

I would never ever willingly give birth at home or any distance away from a hospital. It's absolute madness to me. Childbirth is no joke...it's fucking lethal.

Nor would I - I hate the idea of a home birth - but I think it's worth noting that if it's a second birth and the first was uncomplicated it's just as safe as a hospital birth, statistically. We tend to think of hospital just as a place that removes risks but it actually removes some and introduces others. People talk a lot about the terrible things that might have happened if they'd given birth at home but no one ever considers the bad things that might not have happened at home.

Ah interesting!
I definitely felt as if I'd been relieved of the burden of being pregnant

@Hardbackwriter
Quite. My hospital birth resulted in avoidable complications and my home birth was lovely and straightforward.

@Hardbackwriter

I would never ever willingly give birth at home or any distance away from a hospital. It's absolute madness to me. Childbirth is no joke...it's fucking lethal.

Nor would I - I hate the idea of a home birth - but I think it's worth noting that if it's a second birth and the first was uncomplicated it's just as safe as a hospital birth, statistically. We tend to think of hospital just as a place that removes risks but it actually removes some and introduces others. People talk a lot about the terrible things that might have happened if they'd given birth at home but no one ever considers the bad things that might not have happened at home.

Yes and my second birth was actually a water birth and I had no intervention. All the midwife did was occasionally check the heartbeat. Theoretically a home birth would have worked out ok. I know some women say that they're more relaxed giving birth at home but the opposite would be true for me. I'd be really panicky and anxious about something going wrong.

@formerbabe childbirth can be a very dangerous time and history is littered with women and babies dying during the process

BUT not every birth is like this and the majority are straightforward (otherwise our species wouldn't survive)

My second birth could easily have been a home birth. It was 3 hours start to finish, could have managed without any pain relief but used gas and air. Baby was well, I was well. No stitches needed and she fed perfectly 45 mins after birth.

Wherever you start out might not be where you end up!

For me, it really helped that I’d learned some hypnobirthing meditations. Any calming techniques would probably work. Then you’ve got that to turn to if it goes off-plan.

Yes @twizbe. My second birth sounds very similar...only gas and air and no intervention. Could have been a home birth but I'd never take the chance.

I would never ever willingly give birth at home or any distance away from a hospital. It's absolute madness to me. Childbirth is no joke...it's fucking lethal.

Again stressing that I support the right of every woman to make her own choices and have no judgement to make of your preference for hospital births- childbirth wasn't fucking lethal for me, my planned homebirths were not madness and there is extensive research suggesting that home birth is no more dangerous and may even be safer for second and subsequent births in low risk pregnancies. The midwives who attended both my home births were experienced, skilled professionals and came with an inordinate amount of kit. Perhaps the risks involved were more than you would be happy with, but homebirth is not 'absolute madness'.

@unmarkedbythat. Yes sorry, I should have said potentially lethal. Wrong wording for sure. Like I said, I had very easy births but I wouldn't have taken that for granted.

@unmarkedbythat
Well said. There is always a huge amount of negativity about home births on mumsnet... from people who mostly haven't had a home birth or done any research on them 🙄

how women know more than medical practitioners about what their body needs.

Tbf this is exactly how I felt during my 2nd labour. The midwives kept giving me these updates on what my body was doing and when I needed to push and I already knew it all, only of course I knew it about 5 seconds before they did because it was my body doing it all! If I could've told them to be quiet I would've done . Speaking to some of my friends a few of them have similar stories, including noticing something was very wrong long before the midwives did.

Anyway, I had home births with both mine and will hopefully be having a home birth with baby no 3. There wasn't any whale song, tealights or any of that crap but it wasn't at all medicalised and extremely relaxed. I know from experience that I get very panicky in a hospital environment, do I think I would probably struggle with anything too clinical.

It's no big deal if you don't agree as we are all different. I doubt you will get a surrounded by doctors and nurses birth though unless you are high risk.

OP I don't disagree that birth is a medical procedure, however it is vastly different to any other procedure you would go into hospital for.

Operations/ examinations/ tests etc are all things done by the medical team to you

Birth is something that you do. The medical team are there to assist or step in as may be required but the process is a natural thing that happens to the body (obvs small number of cases where labour has to be brought on).

So making the birth as relaxing and comfortable for the woman is beneficial as this is helping her body do something it's biologically designed to do.

I had a long tricky first birth (though not risky or very painful). When pregnant the second time I imagined being the baby and asked him where he’d like to be born, and the answer came back “where the doctors are!”

I’d stress though that I don’t think my body’s very good at getting babies out without help. Others are much better at it

I actually did end up surrounded by midwives and doctors (well I think just one doctor) with my second, although I hadn't really considered that they must have been quite concerned until just now. Mostly I was just busy screaming and telling people I didn't like them...

Whether you do antenatal classes or not OP, educate yourself. I didn't and regretted it!

Look up everything: all the stuff around good environments and birth locations right the way through to success rates of induction to the pros and cons of CS. Forewarned is forearmed. And you'll also be in a position to have an opinion on your options, wherever you choose to labour.

I would also say take the stuff about your body being designed to do this with a big pinch of salt. It is designed, insofar as you conceived. But your body is also designed to walk upright, therefore your hip shape needs to be narrower. My consultant told me that, if he'd been in charge of designing the human body, all women would have a hatch over their womb for checking babies and getting them out safely with minimal fuss...

It's really a to wash their own thing. I was delighted to have an ELCS and spend 5 days cracked off my tits on medical grade heroin.

My best friend couldn't think of anything worse and had a home birth in water.

You just need to figure out what works for you

• antenatal classes are probably a good shout.

Giving birth to a child is the easy bit.

Raising a child is 1000 times harder.

@speakout I reckon being pregnant was a million times harder than both.