Second baby birth fears/Hypnobirthing

[RoseBlush1]

I’m 25 weeks and have the choice of an elective c section if I want due to a traumatic birth with my first child. I haven’t decided yet and keep changing my mind but recently been thinking Hypnobirthing and getting a positive birth experience whether it be vaginal or c section.

Last night I was reading a Hypnobirthing book and listened to a 30 min relaxation track which was good at first but when she started saying “trust that your body knows how to birth your own baby” it got me upset and anxious as that wasn’t the case with my first!

Has anyone overcome their fears after a bad birth and managed to use Hypnobirthing techniques?

I'd have a good old epidural if I were you. I did it was a lovely experience.

My first was a traumatic birth and I ended up on itu. My second was twins born vaginally on gas and air each birth is different. I was told when you've had a traumatic birth the first time the fresh hold for interventions is lower.
I'm not sure about hypnobirthing but what about some counselling to talk through your options?

@madcatladyforever - I am considering an epidural as well!

@Rubyandsaphire wow twins! So pleased your second birth was a better experience for you. I guess I worry I don’t know how it’s going to go this time and so scared the same happens again. I’ve got consultant appointments to talk it through and with the midwife but with them both concluding it’s my decision and that’s where I’m struggling so counselling could be a good option.

My first wasn't exactly traumatic but I found it all quite scary due to having never done it before. Second time I did the positive birth company course. I took the whole thing with a massive pinch of salt. In the end my second labour should have been more traumatic as DD was back to back and stuck, and our planned home birth ended in an emergency transfer. But the knowledge gained from the PBC helped me to understand what was happening and stay calm. So even though I didn't get my "perfect hypnobirth", I am glad I did the course.

My first wasn't traumatic but he was undiagnosed breech, not discovered for 32 hours after my waters had gone with my midwife telling me we coild "wait it out and most people labour naturally within 48 hours" (this was before it was discovered he was breech when I finally took myself off to the hospital because there was also the possibility of merconium, which she also said we could "keep an eye on" 😑. Although not traumatic I've battled with how wrong it could have gone had I not trusted my gut instinct and the whole "your body was made for this" annoys the crap out of me, not in a sense of I feel personally attacked by the statement but I feel like it guides women into an absolutely false sense of security. I'm reading the Positive Birth Company hypnobirthing book this time because I'm constantly flipping between VBAC and RCS but honestly every time I hear that statement I feel like finding the author and hitting her square between the eyes with the book 🤬

@wineymummy thank you so much for your feedback on the Positive Birth Company, I've been looking at this and debating whether to buy the digital pack or not.

@FirstTimeBumps sorry to hear about your first experience. That is the type of statements that were bugging me and I was hoping my mindset would change if I listen to them more!

@RoseBlush1 I’ve no advice as such but just wanted to say I’m in the same boat. I have decided to elect a CSection as I had bad tearing last time and just can’t buy into hypnobirthing at all. Exactly like you say, the lines like ‘trust your body’ etc just don’t resonate with me. I hope you reach a decision that’s right for you x

@mamablondie2 sorry I didn't see this post until now. When are you due? I've been reading up on hypnobirthing still and still floating between decisions!

I'm in the same position as you OP.

I bought the Bump to Baby Chapter programme for £27 and it's actually been very helpful. It doesnt come out with (what I see as) trite nonsense like 'surges' or 'your body knows what to do'. It frames it as doing everything you can so the odds are stacked in your favour, and a big focus on EBRAN to help stay in control. The reviews are very good even from people who havent had births go to plan because it doesnt frame it as a 'fail'.

Also have you had a debrief? That helped me understand that the issues I had with my first were probably.down to it being my first so not necessarily going to happen again!

Just thought I'd do an update. I decided against doing the hypnobirthing course and declined an elective c section. Was so worried I'd made the wrong decision on both but after being induced my daughter arrived very quickly half an hour after my waters broke! I had the healing birth I wanted and all went well ❤️ thanks again for all your replies xx