No pain relief??

[K1999]

So I'm adamant at this stage that I do not want any pain relief. Gas and air at the absolute most. Any comments on this? 'You're absolutely crazy', 'don't be a hero' comments are all welcome, I just want to know how realistic this is as this is my first baby and have no idea what to expect other than excruciating pain..

It doesn’t matter. That’s my comment.

You feel like it does now, and it’s true you will remember the days your babies were born forever, but the having or not having of medication will not be the thing you remember. You might even feel like it matters for weeks, months, after. It certainly matters to nobody else, not even a little bit.

I have only given birth without pain relief, I have nothing to compare it to, but the thing I remember was the feeling of being on top of the world. Only a few years on, the birth story sharing has gone, the mechanics no longer matter, all I have left is the feeling, and I am certain there are many routes to that same end.

Good luck.

I just had gas and air for the last couple of hours and was in the birthing pool. However everyone is different. Some people have nothing and others have epidurals. I'd suggest research the different options and try to keep an open mind.

For what it's worth gas and air actually didn't relieve any pain for me whatsoever. It was just nice to feel a bit 'out of it' and breathing it in was something to focus on.

Good luck!

Personally I don’t think you should make your mind up and be adamant until you are in labour.

Everyone deals with pain differently -

I always say to people....do you take paracetamol if you’ve got a headache? Or lemsip if you’ve got flu / a cold?

The answer tends to be yes... so why wouldn’t you for one of the most painful experiences in your life?!

1st labour - diamorphine gas and air, didn’t want an epidural as I thought it would lead to forceps. I was physically exhausted and still ended up in theatre with a spinal and forceps. Should have had the epidural.

2nd labour- arrived to late for an epidural they said, still had six hours of agony , gas and air and some rubbish low level
Painkiller.
Ended up with internal problems after birth so ended up with an operation and another bloody spinal.

Should have pushed for an epidural!

I did Dd1 on gas and air (36hrs start to finish) and DD2 on nothing (super fast non planned home delivery). I wanted to avoid drugs as I was paranoid they would affect ability to bf. It was fairly dreadful (particularly as Dd1 went on so long) but means to an end. But you have to do what works at the time for you. Have a plan but don’t be afraid to change it if it doesn’t suit what ends up happening. And you may have no choice to do a different plan, so don’t beat yourself up if you do need something to help.

I would say I wouldn't be broadcasting this as 99% sure you'll want something. I only had time for gas and air as I had such a quick labour and it made me sick as a dog and didn't take any pain away just made me woozy. I had a retained placenta which required a spinal and that feeling was just joyous.

So I'm adamant at this stage that I do not want any pain relief.

I think the only thing to ask here is why?

There are no medals however your baby gets here. For me, having my options open and different things available if I needed them was a good thing.

Few people really care about others’ choices, but they do love commenting on the birth/baby/feeding/sleeping shebang in a way which can seem critical but is often (I think) “something to say”. “Oh that’s interesting” and move the conversation on can be a really useful tactic.

(And I’ve had three very different labours (from most of a day on a drip to an hour start to finish) with nothing more than gas and air. It is possible.)

Because of a blood condition I'm not able to have any pain relief at all so I've had 3 totally natural births.
If I could have had pain relief I would have snapped their hands off. Epidural all the way!
I don't think anyone knows how they will cope till it's happening. All I can give you is my experience and for me it was the most disgustingly painful thing I have ever experienced. No joke, if they had offered the lethal injection to put me out of my misery I would have taken it.
Some people cope really really well though so I would advise you not to rule it out and see how you get on without but don't stress if you need help.

My advice would be don't be adamant about anything. Every birth is different and you don't know how you will feel at the time. I've given birth without pain relief only because my labour was so fast I didn't get into hospital until it was too late for any. It was the most horrendous pain I thought I was going to die from the pain. I would have given anything for some pain relief. My first birth was a lot better with the gas and air I had.

Keep your options open. You don’t have to decide now.

I didn't have any pain relief at all. Not through choice. The pushing was easy and not sore at all. She came out in two pushes. What was sore was the 28 hours of contractions beforehand. I couldn't move for the pain so just went into myself. It was the most painful experience of my life. But the sense of achievement and empowerment afterwards was overwhelming. Even now I feel that.

Don't under estimate how painful it can be when breaking membranes if needed etc can be. I even vomited from the pain. But I did it, no stitches thankfully either. Just be prepared and it's not like a painful period pain vwell not for me anyway. It was a pain you cannot understand or describe until you've experienced it.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

I took all pain relief offered to me, i do not regret my decision. I was exhausted and needed to sleep.

I didn't get on with gas and air and had my first with nothing but the water. Did it hurt yes, am I sorry not even slightly. It was a great experience and I had the most amazing euphoria afterwards. I'd do that birth again any day and preferred it to my second where I had an epidural for the last few hours.

That said, I wouldn't be too set on anything in advance as a lot depends on chance and circumstance.

I was adamant I was having a drug free labour. Then DS1 was back to back, I had nearly 2 days of non-productive contractions. I was exhausted and in pain. Ended up with pethidine and epidural. I'd like to say they were brilliant but I didn't like the feeling of not being in control that the epidural gave me. That particular labour was out of my control by that point anyway so I don't blame the epidural! I couldn't have managed that labour without the pain relief I had.

Second labour, also back to back, but clearly managed to figure out turning and had him on my living room floor with no drugs and 3 pushes. It was almost enjoyable in comparison.

But both were totally different labours. I think you need to see how things are when it's happening and make a decision then.

Be adamant but change your mind at any point without feeling bad.

I had two births would painkillers apart from a couple of paracetamol. I was terrified of the thought of intervention and that wasnt great

^^my baby figured out turning. Not me obvs!

What is your motivation for no pain relief?

I didn't have pain relief with DC2. Not through choice, she just arrived too quickly for me to get any.
I'd say don't say you don't want it now. If once your in labour you still feel you can do without it that's different but I'd def keep your options open

Why would you make that decision until you know what level of it pain you will be in? Obviously if you are coping with it, you wouldn’t take pain relief. But you may need it. Every labour is different.

Why?

Have it as a preference, do it if you can & if it doesn’t work out for whatever reason then don’t worry. I wanted that first time, ended up with a crash c-section, which I would advise pain relief for! What happened was completely irrelevant in the end because the outcome was a healthy baby.

I think you should hold off on making your mind up as if you have a longer labour or for example a back to back labour you are setting yourself up for a lot of trauma.

Would I have loved to have had a 5 hour birth in a birthing pool? Yes but mine was longer and more complex. Don’t underestimate how shit sleep deprivation is either! Pethidine/ epidural can be great for getting some rest so you can enjoy your first moments with your baby.

I’ve had one birth with no pain relief and one with gas and air. The gas and air one was much better!!

My mother had two home births and my sister had two straight forward births.

So I had the confidence to try for home births. I had my first at home with only tens and paracetamol, gas and air for the last 10 minutes (as midwife got here very late).
It was definitely doable.

I also had my second at home, didn't bother with paracetamol and had a little longer of the gas and air but I didn't feel it helped me much.

I was very fortunate, had luck and genes on my side, physically.

To mentally prepare, I did a hypnobirthing CD, read loads of natural Birth books (Dick Grantley-Read? Ina May Gaskin, and Juju Sundin) which all helped me. I selected various coping mechanisms including breathing exercises and visualisation, pacing, stood up throughout both births pacing and counting each breath, in for 6 out for 4.

It is possible, but it's not the be all and end all. If you're happy to try it the go for it but there's no shame in changing your mind and going in to hospital any time and asking for pain relief if you need it!
The most important thing is a healthy mum and baby.

Good luck!