Anyone had C-section at 37wks for mental health?

[WatchingFriendsOnRepeat]

I'm at the end of my tether after a horrific pregnancy that just keeps getting worse and I'm praying that they will let me have my baby soon...

I am 35wks (36 on Tuesday) with my second child. Have been hospitalised due to severe hyperemesis throughout the pregnancy, tore 2 holes in my abdominal muscle wall from the violent vomiting and I'm still sick. Sickness medication worked for a few days but now nothing works and tried various ones.

At Xmas I caught the flu and was hospitalised again. It was horrific and the care I received was so bad that I've actually changed hospitals (but that's a different story - only adding that to show the added stress). The hospital nearly killed me and baby. I'm now booked in with a far superior hospital that is well known for its maternity unit and so far they have been amazing, although they are at least 30mins away when there is no traffic so I'm praying I don't go into labour and get stuck in traffic!

Since having flu I haven't shaken the mucus cough and blocked sinuses so am constantly blowing my nose and having coughing fits, which is also triggering nosebleeds and even more vomiting!

Last week I cracked 2 ribs during a coughing fit and now am in so much pain that today I had a mini mental breakdown and couldn't stop crying - which only added to the pain in my ribs, and the mucus and snot and coughing, which kills each time I sniff or cough or blow my nose! (Sorry, TMI!)

My parents live next door so have taken my 4yo over to theirs with them. I have no partner/"baby daddy" because he left when I was 19weeks pregnant and I've not heard from him since half term in October (since found out he is living with a young 20yr old girl that he was having an affair with - my neighbour's daughter!). I have been on anti depressants since miscarrying my little girl in 2018 at 20wks due to Edwards syndrome and I'm in no way ready to come off of them. I have chronic fatigue/ME, fibromyalgia and stress triggered epilepsy (and the stress is just mounting and mounting despite me deep breathing and trying so hard to keep a lid on things).

I'm just so low and in such a dark place. I've not had a second to enjoy this pregnancy and I just want it over with now. I want to hold my baby and finally have some joy. I want to feel love, not resentment - something I'm desperately trying to fight off!!!! I want my body to finally rebuild its immune system and start healing.

I am booked in for a c section on the 16th March. I will be a day shy of 39 weeks then. That is 3 weeks on Monday. I'm seeing the surgeon on Tuesday to sign paperwork and I really want to beg him to take the baby out the day I turn 37weeks. What is the likelihood of that being allowed, considering my mental health??? What is the likelihood of there being anything wrong with the baby if he comes out at 37wks? It's full term isn't it? So it should be ok, no? Will my milk still come in? Will I still be able to breastfeed?

Has anyone any experience or knowledge of mental health deterioration being a good enough reason to deliver a baby at 37wks?

I am desperate and anyone that can see me, knows that. I don't want to harm the baby and I know him staying inside me as long as possible is obviously best, but if it won't harm him, it will be best for both of us if my mental health is under control, surely?!

Thanks for taking the time to read - I know it's long!!!!!!

I'm so sorry you're going through such a rough time.

I had my section at smack on 38 weeks on the grounds of mental health. I had also previously lost a daughter at 20 weeks and was finding the whole thing very hard. I outright refused to go a day over 38 weeks as I was terrified of going into actual labour. I had steroid injections a couple of days before and my second daughter was absolutely fine.

I would talk to your midwife and see what your trusts stance is and maybe you can get it done a bit earlier. I completely understand just wanting it to be over.

You poor thing, you’ve been through so so much.

I don’t think they’ll do a csection at 37 weeks unless it was for the baby’s sake. But with what you’ve been through I’m sure they’d seriously discuss an earlier section with you.

Speak to your midwife, and go armed with the NICE guildelines re csection requests. You need to show you’ve researched what a section involves and why it will be the best course of action for you and baby. Don’t let them talk you out of it, it may take some pushing.

I hope you’re ok, and you have your wonderful baby soon.

Thank you both for replying. Maybe they will say 38 weeks as a compromise. I hope they will.

What are the NICE guidelines? I'll make sure I do my research and go armed with as much knowledge as possible. And my mother... she has had to really handhold me through the past few months but even she has been brought to tears the past couple of days since my ribs went. It was the final straw for both of us I think.

It's my little 4yo I feel most guilty about - but he is the only thing to give me joy right now. When he catches me being sick, he rubs my back. When he hears me scream in pain from my ribs, he will hug me and ask if I need anything. When my nose bleeds for the 10th time everyday, he will run and get a box of tissues... it's not just me I want this over for, it's him too. He probably thinks I'm about to give birth to the antichrist! Luckily he tells everyone how excited he is about being a big brother and he rubs my belly and kisses it and tells the baby how much he loves him already, but I can't help feeling bad that he hasn't been completely shielded from the past 9mths of hell. I tried and still try but it's so hard especially now "D"P has disappeared.

He only contacted me once to ask if I knew where his PlayStation was and to tell me he doesn't want anything to do with the kids anymore - 4yo and unborn baby.

At least all the distractions with my failing health during this pregnancy have been so much to deal with that I actually couldn't give a shit about him now... think I shed about 2 tears for him. Now I have bigger problems to tackle!!!!

I had a section consultation earlier this week & asked why they wait until 39 weeks for Breech pregnancies (which mine is). The consultant said section babies are at higher risk of having breathing difficulties weeks than vaginal deliveries so they hold off as long as they can to ensure the lungs are as strong as possible! At 37 weeks in my hospital, they give steroids to strengthen the lungs of a section is needed so I’d be surprised if they’d go with 37 weeks for you.. but they might suggest 38 hopefully!

Sorry you’ve had such a rough time, I hope the end of pregnancy goes smoothly for you!

The evidence shows that the risk of respiratory distress syndrome in the newborn are much higher for section babies born at 37 weeks compared to 39 weeks. National guidance was changed a few years ago to say no sections prior to 39 weeks unless medical indication.

They may say your mental health is a medical indication, however it’s fairly unlikely.